Reblogs

You are a villain, but not by choice. Your goals are generally condemned as evil without ever even listening to your reasoning, so when the hero offered to talk with you before your big fight you eagerly accepted, much to the hero's surprise.

The king listens to you. The prince learns from you. You can raise commoners to greatness and humble foolish nobles. But the court never could understand the power you hold because they can’t look beyond the jester costume.

Brain like a ganglion (2-3 nerve cells)

Whole-heartedly BEGGING writers to unlearn everything schools taught you about how long a paragraph is. If theres a new subject, INCLUDING ACTIONS, theres a new paragraph. A paragraph can be a single word too btw stop making things unreadable

$50,000 immediately dropped into my bank account wouldn't improve EVERYTHING but boy it sure would be a grand, sexy little start to a good, happy life path, don't you think

Reblog for unexpected $$$ dropping into your Bank account.

uhh did i forget how time works or was the first post in december 2018 and the second in august 2018

Reblog for time travelling $$$ dropping into your Bank account.

Wtf????

Smoove with it too 

This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters. 

“Pathetic.  You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”

Baseball players are to be feared

Reblogging for the last one

^Same for me

They just kept getting progressively more “woah”

much woah

Oh my god this is a lucky universe

every time this post comes around, my favorite part is the “I know it’s the Mets” qualifier at the beginning lmao like how baseball that this zillion note posts starts with “sorry for putting this hellteam on your dash, bUT”

Y’all have no idea how hard I was trying not to laugh in class at that poor bird

They…they just blew up a fucking bird…

World Heritage Post

Dude popped that bird and made it his whole personality. And you know what, I respect it. I’d do the same if I had that to my name.

You can literally make anything and anyone problematic if you try hard enough seriously give me people and things and I’ll make them all “problematic” right now.

Dogs.

I don’t even have to do this one because PETA did it first by insinuating domestication is inherently abusive.

The sky

Used to trick and mock anyone who asks “what’s up?” A bullying tactic.

Super Mario Bros.

Stereotypes Italians, enforces the narrative of women who need men to rescue them, and encourages violence against turtles.

John Mulaney

He was over on the bench and he SAW what they did to Tyler and he did NOTHING.

Omfg

Pokemon

Making your pets fight repeatedly is animal abuse.

OP

OP literally argued that dogs were problematic but go off I guess

This is a work of art and should be sent to everyone as soon as they sign up for Tumblr so they know what they’re walking into

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

As a joke you had always said "I dedicate this to Hades" as you threw away food scraps from your cooking and cleaning your plates. When you die you find yourself in front of Charon's boat with Hades sitting in it, seemingly very excited to see his most devoted follower in recent times.

She's so silly

Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.

BURN BAGEL BURN

OH WHY NOT?

I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD

The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!

Let’s see what you can do bagel

I need your luck, bagel

….. Bagel?

Bagel.

Roasted bagel

Why the Hell not, Bagel, please help, my package is late.

it’s here so why not see if it’ll do anything

lol yes

Well I can’t really retweet is because this is tumblr 🙃

kinda need this rn.

please bagel

hi bagel please help me out with #rares on #animal jam thanks

Pls babel