Call Me Cowboy

my excessive use of commas and my love of run on sentences is alluring and attractive to my readers

im completely addicted to Open Link in New Tab

if Open Link in New Tab is wrong then baby i dont want to be right

He was tortured and beaten by the ogre

He was beaten and punished by the ogre

He was punished and pummelled by the ogre

He was pummelled and tormented by the ogre

He was tormented and injured by the ogre

He was injured and hurt by the ogre

He was hurt and broken by the ogre

He was broken and damaged by the ogre

He was damaged and harmed by the ogre

He was loved and cuddled by the ogre as part of their BDSM aftercare

Didn't happen. He was harmed and attacked by the ogre

i bite you?

i bite you?

i bite you?

i bite you?

i b. actually that looks pretty bad. i put a bandages on it

coupons used to mean something now deals are like HURRY NOW! get 3 free napkins when you spend $75+ 😋

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

going forward, red words are considered odd numbers, unless the words were already even numbers, like five. blue words are scared of odd numbers and so will only appear in the same sentence with them if there are green words there too. green words are considered even and five. if you trap a blue word in a sentence with red words but no green words, death will result, and will be considered odd. odd numbers are divisible by purple words unless they (purple or red) are prime or it is raining. death has resulted. a prime number can eat the corpses of most red words and some others but they will be absolutely poisoned and die if they eat an even number, like five. this is how the stock market works.