one stigmata away from a good ass day

i, personally, love to straddle that fine line between “fandom blog” and “record of complete psychological breakdown”

The first rule of fandom is have fun. The second rule of fandom is find an enabler and become an enabler. Yes you should write that fic. What if it was even hornier? What if it was angstier? What if you wrote it just for me?

i very much want to clarify before people get mad at me: i am not saying this is a thing that matters genuinely literally at all ever. i just am curious if most people care or are even aware of this.

waiter waiter more depictions of traumatised malnourished characters putting on some weight postcanon to show their recovery from the horrors please !!!!!!!!!!!

the online identity and gimmick-ifying of autism is so odd. I'm diagnosed with autism and yet I barely identify with any stuff I see about it anymore. It feels like autism is being rebranded as the Silly Guy Disorder that gives you smart and beautiful hyperspecific interests. it's not that I mind silly jokes or being lighthearted about being autistic- but when the entire social movement is based around marketing us this way, I just can't help but feel isolated from it. it feels like I'm not the right kind of autistic. I'm not marketable and digestible to common audiences, and therefore I am discarded by the movement in the name of progress and acceptance. it feels foul.

"Doomed yaoi" this "doomed yuri" that what about doomed found family. What about finding comfort in these new people after going through so much on your own—a community, a solace, a home to come back to. Caring for them with all you've got, only to realize that it wasn't going to work, ever, no matter what you tried. Only to have it ripped apart, no matter how much you tried to hold them close. Found family that becomes lost family. Found family that takes your heart with it when they go.

it's called a museum because me 'n' u see 'em

There's a recurring online tendency to aestheticize consensus itself. The imagined future village is full of emotionally compatible people who enjoy communal gardening, conflict resolution circles, acoustic folk music, mutual aid potlucks, and repairing bicycles together at sunset. Which is nice for the people who genuinely enjoy that lifestyle. But plenty of humans are solitary, prickly, obsessive, urban, nocturnal, sensory-seeking, technologically attached, contrarian, novelty-seeking, private, or just plain difficult. Those people do not evaporate after the revolution. They do not get Left Behind while you are Raptured into the Utopia. They become your neighbors.

when your wire letterboxd mutual sees you log a cloth movie

Being autistic fucking sucks sometimes because other adults either treat me like a 7-year-old, or like a really really smart prodigy 7-year-old.

this never ends btw

one day, i hope to be moved from your downloads folder into somewhere more deliberate