Kitty The Clown/Jester Enthusiast

"Preparing [for the role of Nikki] was really fun. We got to watch a lot of fun movies, and kind of pick and choose, like a puzzle, what we wanted in the film. Moments that we took inspiration from, and made them our own." — Inde Navarrette for Fandango "We watched Get Out, and focused on a lot of the moments where characters are showing an emotion underneath but saying something completely different [on the surface], and how horrific that is. There's a scene where [Nikki] is saying, "no", and there is a [similar] scene in Get Out [which we took inspiration from]." — Inde Navarrette for A Shot Magazine Obsession (2026) Dir. Curry Barker Get Out (2017) Dir. Jordan Peele

i wrote this while working in a program for new writers. on wednesdays, two of the teachers would be contractually obligated to read our writing aloud to the group of 300+ teens. i had never read my work in public before. i had something like 6k poems and was panicking about it. none of them are good enough. sometimes the train is howling. it is hard, actually, sometimes, even as an adult.

and then i thought - what is one thing i wish i could tell all of them. each of these 300 kids. what did i need to hear, at 16?

i wanted to tell them about the day you wake up, and the sun feels warm finally. i wanted to tell them about carving a life out of soapstone, your hands turning bloody. i wanted to tell them that sometimes yes - it actually does feel easy. i wanted to tell them about weddings and cookie dough and long road trips. about albums of new music and old friends laughing and the sound of snow falling.

you will learn the pattern of the train. you will learn to close your eyes when you hear the engine rumbling. you will learn to let yourself have the grey days in their lily-soft numbness. sometimes it will feel like life is wet paint, and god has smeared your canvas across a sewer grate. sometimes it will be so boring it isn’t even pronounceable - the tenacious, soundless blankness. survival isn’t just ugly nights and wild mornings. it is also the steady, unimportant moments. it is just driving with your seatbelt on. it is calling a friend on the way home. it is burying your face into the fur of your dog.

when i had finished reading this poem aloud, the auditorium was silent for a solid minute. someone stood up to take a picture of where it had been projected onto a screen, and then three more people followed the action, and then - like a bad internet story, people remembered they were supposed to be clapping. kids came up to me after it - thank you for writing that. i think i hear a train coming.

i would write this differently now, i think, but it has been 7 years. i still live by the tracks. i also haven’t picked up a blade in over 10 years. the scars are still there, but these days i only pick up scissors to cut my hair. i know why you can’t tell your mom about it. i know how the numbness slips over everything, a restless horrible cotton. i know how when you dropped the dish, you weren’t crying about the broken glass. i know about feeling like all the roads have closed their exits, that you aren’t supposed to still-be-here - and yet.

i am still here, and still yours, and i haven’t forgotten. what i’m saying is if any hope is calling to you - i know it’s hard, but you have to listen. i’m saying keep driving, but slow down the car. sit down in the shower, i’m not judging you. we can stay in the dark with the good hot water and do nothing but stare. notice the stab wound. make it through another tuesday.

i know what it is like to miss yourself. do what you need to. come home to me. i am writing to you, my past self, from the future. i’ll be waiting for you.

also me:

Free Harvard courses. Free Courses from Stanford. Free Courses from MIT. Free courses from Yale. Free courses from Princeton.

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For paid, there's The Great Courses+/Wonderium. 20$ a month for unlimited courses.

And I also wanted to mention that humanitarian organisations have free courses too, like the Red Cross on international humanitarian law.

Bugs Bunny: I’m tellin’ you, doc, they/them pussy is different

Daffy Duck: Aw, pussy is pussy. Just watch me.

*fireworks*

At the start of my employment, my boss showed me videos of people stealing, and we both had a chuckle about it. How silly they were! There was a camera overhead, and it’s not to watch the shoppers. See, we can’t actually stop shoplifters. They get away with it maybe nine out of ten times. But we, who are watched and tallied and witnessed? We are always caught.

At first it was hard to hold one hundred dollars bills. An amount I had never seen before. An amount that didn’t exist in my household. It’s normal now. Here is something that is not for me.

“What the hell, I’ll take another,” says the man, pondering our 200 dollar watches. What the hell. Total comes to 580 and not even a flinch in his face. I have been working for 11 hours today and made only 110 dollars. It will go to my rent. Today I work for free, it feels. When I get my check, I will have 35 dollars left for food and saving.

The six hundreds he hands me go into the cash register. For a moment, I imagine having money. Then I put it away, counting out his change.

I know for a fact we sell our products for double what they are worth. That I could be making commission. That they could hand me those 580 dollars and change my life and not even mark the difference in their checkbooks. He’s not the only sale they make today, but I am the reason they made it. He’s not the only one spending 600 dollars, but if I hadn’t spent two hours with him telling me about his life, he wouldn’t have spent any. I go home. I don’t own a watch.

I have watched and rewatched a video on how to make salmon four ways. My shopping list is always the same. Pasta. Rice. Tuna. If I can afford butter it was a good week. I dream of the world I will never walk in, where I can throw the best fish fillet in the cart with a shrug. I hold hundreds in my hand and look up at the camera. I put them under the cash drawer.

I go to work. I scrap together my savings. I eat my bowl of rice slowly. My manager takes a paid week off from work just for his birthday. He owns a yacht. 

i was part of their college program. i moved to the state for it. they legally owned the building i was living in and still charged me rent. i ostensibly was being charged to work for them. it was a 2 bedroom apartment and they placed 6 adult women in it in forced triples.

as many as one in ten disney employees have experienced homelessness while working for the company. despite huge efforts to unionize, strike, or otherwise demand fair treatment; disney has refused to increase employee quality of life.

disney admits publicly that a good portion of their success is because the employees (“cast members”) are dedicated, passionate, and selfless. this is never reflected in pay. even “face” characters (ie those that are princesses etc) make barely above a minimum wage.

at the time that i worked there, i made $8.50 an hour. at one point i was asked to create a human shield around a bag because a bomb dog had alerted to it. for eight fucking dollars an hour.

i now work a very cushy office job. i have bought the salmon and cooked it all four ways.

i go to the store. i am nice to the person behind the counter. she looks up at the camera while she counts out my change. there is nothing fundamentally different about her and i.

Catching up on art posts, very honored and proud to share this oil painting which went live this past Friday, a work created for Elliot Lang's 'Character In Context' show at the A.R. Mitchell Museum in Trinidad, Colorado. Opening is June 5th (sorry, I will not be there) Link to the on line catalog with the few dozen talented artist's contributions with preliminary studies and final paintings in the comments below.

Precipice

20" x 16" Oil on Panel, framed, 2026

A part of my series of works in dialog with our mythological fascination with space travel and our place in the universe.

Character in Context

A.R. Mitchell Museum of Western Art

150 E. Main St.

Trinidad, CO 81082

Exploring good traits gone bad in a novel can add depth and complexity to your characters. Here are a few examples of good traits that can take a negative turn:

1. Empathy turning into manipulation: A character with a strong sense of empathy may use it to manipulate others' emotions and gain an advantage.

2. Confidence becoming arrogance: Excessive confidence can lead to arrogance, where a character belittles others and dismisses their opinions.

3. Ambition turning into obsession: A character's ambition can transform into an unhealthy obsession, causing them to prioritize success at any cost, including sacrificing relationships and moral values.

4. Loyalty becoming blind devotion: Initially loyal, a character may become blindly devoted to a cause or person, disregarding their own well-being and critical thinking.

5. Courage turning into recklessness: A character's courage can morph into reckless behavior, endangering themselves and others due to an overestimation of their abilities.

6. Determination becoming stubbornness: Excessive determination can lead to stubbornness, where a character refuses to consider alternative perspectives or change their course of action, even when it's detrimental.

7. Optimism becoming naivety: Unwavering optimism can transform into naivety, causing a character to overlook dangers or be easily deceived.

8. Protectiveness turning into possessiveness: A character's protective nature can evolve into possessiveness, where they become overly controlling and jealous in relationships.

9. Altruism becoming self-neglect: A character's selflessness may lead to neglecting their own needs and well-being, to the point of self-sacrifice and burnout.

10. Honesty becoming brutal bluntness: A character's commitment to honesty can turn into brutal bluntness, hurting others with harsh and tactless remarks.

These examples demonstrate how even admirable traits can have negative consequences when taken to extremes or used improperly. By exploring the complexities of these traits, you can create compelling and multi-dimensional characters in your novel.

1. Know why you’re overwriting.

Overwriting usually comes from fear—fear the reader won’t feel enough, understand enough, or care enough. When you know why you’re adding too much, you can fix the cause instead of just cutting words.

2. Remove repetition, not emotion.

If multiple sentences express the same idea, keep the strongest one. You’re not deleting feeling—you’re sharpening it.

3. Trust the reader to understand subtext.

Readers don’t need every emotion spelled out. Actions, reactions, and choices already communicate more than explanation ever could.

4. Use one concrete detail instead of many vague ones.

Specific sensory or physical details create stronger emotion than listing abstract feelings. One image lets the reader do the emotional work.

5. Filter description through your character’s perspective.

Your character won’t notice everything, especially in intense moments. Limiting description to what they would notice keeps scenes tight and immersive.

6. Cut intensifiers immediately.

Words like very, really, and extremely weaken prose instead of strengthening it. Strong verbs and images do the job better.

7. Let dialogue stand on its own.

Dialogue already carries tone and emotion through word choice and rhythm. Adding explanations often flattens its impact.

8. Keep metaphors purposeful and rare.

Too many metaphors compete with each other and slow the scene. One strong comparison is more memorable than several decent ones.

9. Read your work out loud.

Overwriting becomes obvious when you hear it. If a sentence feels long, heavy, or tiring to say, it likely needs trimming.

10. Ask what the paragraph accomplishes.

Every paragraph should move the story forward, reveal character, or raise tension. If it doesn’t, it’s probably indulgent filler.

11. Edit separately from drafting.

Overwriting is allowed in early drafts. Clean prose comes from revision, not self-censorship while writing.

12. Cut more than you think you should.