notizzy

boyfriend! taki who’s so turned on by whatever you do, and yet still so shy about asking for anything intimacy related - especially at the beginning of your relationship when everything felt so… foreign and scary. poor taki didn’t want to make you uncomfortable in any way so he waited patiently, the question lingering in the back of his head every time you’d make out, every time he’d feel your tits pressing against his chest as you reached for the remote on the other end of the couch.

boyfriend! taki who finally asked you one night at your apartment, voice barely audible, and it was as if your birthday came early - your lips on his in an instant, mumbling about how you were waiting for him to finally suggest taking that step in your relationship. only then did he realise that you wanted this as badly as he did: and that night, in your bed, will forever be engraved in his mind.

boyfriend! taki who can’t get enough of you - the sight of your beautiful tits bouncing up and down as you ride him, the feel of your bare skin burning hot under his fingertips, the feeling of your lips on his, tongues swirling together in messy, rushed motions. he could get drunk on that feeling alone, and he very gladly would if it meant that you’d overtake all of his senses and become the only thing occupying his brain.

boyfriend! taki who, despite being this obsessed with you, keeps your sex life pretty vanilla. you don’t mind it, truly - sex with your boyfriend, no matter its form, is always something you enjoy more than anything else in life. and yet you can’t help but wonder if he’d be down to try something more adventurous: but asking proves to be a challenge because when it comes to those conversations, you’re almost as shy as him.

boyfriend! taki whose eyes widen in slight shock when you shyly suggest an idea that has been stuck in your head for some time now - cheeks reddening and whole face heating up upon hearing that you want to try blindfolding him. still, he obliged happily: despite his prior surprise there was no way to deny his excitement for the idea, especially with the very evident bulge growing in his pants.

‘you said it’ll just be a blindfold.’ he mumbled, lips pouty as you tied a pretty pink ribbon around his wrists, hands behind his back as he sat up on the edge of the bed. ‘you’re saying i don’t get to see you and i don’t get to touch you either? that’s torture.’

you smiled at your boyfriend, leaning in to plant a soft kiss to his lips.

‘i um, wanted to try it out. just this once.’ you mumbled, lips just millimeters away from his face, forehead resting against his. ‘please?’

and how could taki say no when his darling girlfriend was looking at him with those beautiful eyes of hers, her voice so soft and sweet?

he took one last look at you - eyes scanning your features, your face, your figure, as if he didn’t have the image of it engraved into his brain already. his gaze landed upon the pastel pink material resting in your hands, the material seemingly delicate enough to make him think it wouldn’t actually fully obstruct his view. oh, how wrong poor taki was. despite its light colour, the blindfold covered his eyes perfectly, denying him any form of sight.

‘can you see anything?’ you asked, waving your hand right in front of his face just to make sure. your boyfriend shook his head slightly, the material not budging in the slightest.

‘nothing except for all the pink in front of my eyes.’

you giggled, and the sound of your laughter alone sent a wave down taki’s body - almost as if taking his sight away has heightened his other senses, as if he’s suddenly become sensitive to sound alone.

the sight in front of you was nothing short of beautiful. your boyfriend looked so… vulnerable in front of you, lips slightly parted as he breathed in and out, chest rising and falling at a slow, steady pace. for a split second, you got shy about your next actions, but you couldn’t back down now - with taki tied up in front of you, there was nothing left to do than to go through with what you had wanted to try, what has been occupying your mind.

taki had no idea of what you were planning to do - which made it even more surprising when he’d felt your fingers grazing at the hem of his sweatpants, trailing a little lower to palm him through the thick material. he gasped at the sudden contact, almost bucking up into your touch as your hand applied gentle pressure to his growing bulge, hand gently moving up and down his shaft. the material of his sweats felt almost like a prison for him - denying him the feeling of your bare skin on his, denying him of the bliss he could experience.

and then you stopped.

your hand lifted up from his pants so fast taki almost didn’t register it. and yet before he was able to say anything, he felt your fingers again - this time pulling at the top of his pants, sliding them down his legs with the little help taki could provide by slightly lifting himself up. you smiled to yourself seeing the damp spot on his boxers, precum already leaking from his tip.

‘didn’t know you were that excited.’ you mumbled, fingers lightly grazing his cock through the material of his boxers. taki’s breath hitched in his throat, suddenly hypersensitive to your every touch, no matter how light. but then you stopped again - hand lifting up from his crotch and not coming back, your boyfriend growing impatient with need.

‘why’d you- why did you stop.’ he said, voice already breathy, almost whiny, laced with want. you’ve only just begun and yet he was already worked up - a fact which seemed to only boost your confidence as you answered him.

‘oh i’m just undressing.’ your words echoed through the room, and all of a sudden taki’s mouth felt dry. ‘what a shame you cannot see me right now, isn’t it?’

oh.

taki cursed under his breath, voice low and airy. he wanted so desperately to see you right now, and yet he couldn’t - confined to the prison of a pink ribbon tied at the back of his head, restricting his view and leaving it all to his imagination. but what is the image of you in his imagination when he knows the real deal is right in front of him and he cannot as much as look at it?

‘this is literal torture, love.’ he tried to argue, his pleas falling on deaf ears as your fingertips traced gentle patterns on his stomach, trailing lower to the hem of his boxers. your grip tightened around the material, pulling it down oh so slowly and taki swore that his brain stopped working for a second. ‘you can’t just do this and- oh, fuck-’

his cock sprung free, hard and throbbing, head slicked with his precum and you wasted no time - one of your hands reaching for it and gently grabbing at its base, that touch alone enough to make taki whine quietly. he was completely at your mercy - melting and moulding under each movement of your hand up and down his shaft, setting an agonisingly slow pace from the very beginning.

taki wanted to say something - mention the merciless pace with which you pumped his cock, plead for you to let him see you just for a minute, a second even. but then he felt your tongue, wet and hot, licking up an experimental stripe all the way up to his tip and he swore he was a gone man.

another whine slipped past his lips as your tongue came in contact with his length again, swirling around his tip in a slow, almost tantalising motion. your teasing was starting to become more and more unbearable for him - from peppering light kisses up and down his cock, giving the head ever so delicate kitten licks all the way to taking only the tip into your mouth before pulling it out with a wet, satisfying pop. it was all becoming too much: all he wanted was to see you drive him insane, get to kiss you and touch your body in this intimate moment.

he could feel you switching positions - head now far from his crotch, face inching closer towards his. your breath was hot on his body and he couldn’t help but lean closer, almost as if on instinct, hoping to find your lips even if just for a second or two. you gave him none of that satisfaction: lips coming in contact with his neck instead, your hand replacing where your mouth previously was as it continued to tease his cock, movements as slow as ever as you nipped and sucked at the sensitive skin, your boyfriend’s breathing becoming heavier and heavier with each passing second, pretty whines slipping past his lips the most beautiful melody your ears could ever hear.

you surprised yourself with just how much you actually enjoyed seeing your boyfriend like this.

taki’s muscles tensed up, his breathing becoming faster, more rapid, and you knew exactly what it meant - and you could only giggle quietly at the expression on taki’s face when you completely pulled your hand away, denying him the release he was so desperately chasing.

‘oh my god, why would you-’ he whined, cock twitching involuntarily as it rested against his stomach, rock solid and aching for release. ‘please, fuck- i can’t keep going like this, love. please.’

you couldn’t ignore the wetness pooling at your underwear at your boyfriend’s whiny voice - especially not when his soft pleas hit your ears, few tears spilling down his cheeks from the sheer intensity of the situation.

for a split second taki thought his pleading had fallen on deaf ears - your touch leaving his body once again, the empty space you left behind almost torturous. and yet it wasn’t long before you blessed him with it again: one hand resting on his thigh as your mouth enveloped around taki’s cock, your other hand holding it at its base. you gave him no time to prepare, whines leaving your boyfriend’s lips in a beautiful symphony as your mouth worked its wonders, taking his entire length and humming around it. despite his desperate attempts at bucking up his hips into your throat your movements stayed slow, deliberate even.

his mouth became a sanctuary with the amount of pleas leaving his lips, desperation growing to an all time high as tears rolled down his cheeks. he looked so… beautiful like this. you couldn’t keep him waiting any longer.

finally, almost as if heavens themselves had blessed taki, he could feel you speed up your pace - head bobbing up and down as your lips wrapped around him, the muscles in his thighs tensing up under your hands. it didn’t take long for his release to arrive in thick white spurts spilling out of your mouth and onto your tits as you tried to swallow as much of it as you could, his mouth uttering a multitude of whiney thank yous in the process.

taki sighed the moment your mouth left his cock - back falling onto the bed, almost as if he’d just felt how tired his body was. he felt you nuzzle up next to him, gentle hands reaching under his back to finally free his wrists, going up to his face next to slide the blindfold off of his eyes. it took him a second to adjust to the lighting inside the bedroom, eyes landing on your figure the moment his eyes began to work properly again. and boy, was he glad to have his vision back.

you looked gorgeous. divine, even - he couldn’t help the way his cock started hardening almost instantly at the sight. you noticed, of course, a giggle escaping your mouth as your hand reached up to his cheeks, wiping the remnants of his tears.

‘did you… enjoy it?’ you asked, eyes sparkling with curiosity as you laid down next to him. taki nodded almost instantly.

‘of course i did.’ he mumbled, leaning in to plant a soft kiss to your lips. ‘i have no words. that might’ve been the hottest thing you’ve ever done. let’s never do it again.’

‘missed getting to look at me this much?’ you giggled, eyes drifting down to his half hard cock for just a second before looking back up.

‘you wouldn’t even imagine.’ he answered, hand resting on your waist as he cuddled up to you. ‘being denied the pleasure of looking at you is as torturous as being denied breathing.’

‘that was… surprisingly poetic.’ you admitted. taki smiled at your comment.

‘extremely romantic, though.’ he added, fingers drawing gentle patterns along your bare skin. ‘i think i deserve a kiss for that.’

you pretended to be deep in thought about his offer for a few seconds, then leaned in to connect your lips with his and taki couldn’t help but hum in satisfaction - smiling into the kiss like a lovestruck fool. the luckiest lovestruck fool this world has ever seen.

the sun has long been gone, the moon and the clear night sky providing a cozy, ambient light. an almost perfect atmosphere - with almost being the key word, as it was ruined by the harsh, white light of your phone screen and the same song playing on a loop for the fifth time as you awed at the screen.

you heard yuma sigh from your left: next thing you knew, your phone’s been snatched from your hands, your boyfriend conveniently putting it out of your reach. a chuckle left his lips at your confused face, and yet he gave you no time to process - swooping you up from the bed in one swift motion, hands holding you steadily, bridal style.

‘hey! i was watching that!’ you protested, and yet your words fell on deaf ears - yuma chuckling to himself as he carried you out of the bedroom.

‘you’ve watched enough. now it’s time to give some attention to your neglected boyfriend, don’t you think?’

you sighed theatrically, leaning into his chest slightly as he opened the door to the balcony with his elbow, the slight wind hitting you almost immediately - it was a nice change to the weather during the day, the scorching sun finally stepping aside, the air warm but not to an overbearing degree.

the two of you sat on the cold tile floor of the balcony, yuma’s head immediately finding your shoulder to lean on, his actions almost cat-like as he nuzzled into you.

his hands reached out towards yours - fingers interlocking, thumb tracing little patterns on the outer side of your palm. you planted a small, soft kiss on the top of his head, face nuzzling into his hair for a few seconds, and you could feel his body relaxing against your touch, a satisfied hum leaving his lips.

‘you really felt neglected for a second there, hm?’ you mumbled, head resting on top of his.

‘very much.’

‘because of… baby geese?’

‘because of baby geese.’

you giggled at his words, eyes looking up at the clear night sky - the moon shone down on you, the light illuminating yuma’s face in a way which made him look even more beautiful. if that was even humanly possible, of course; you’d always thought your boyfriend to be the most beautiful man to walk this earth.

‘all right. no more videos of cute animals today.’ you stated, yuma’s lips curving up into what could only be described as a triumphant smile upon hearing your words. ‘you have my full attention.’

‘perfect.’

yuma’s lips were on your in no time, peppering your face with kisses before you were able to object - a surprised yelp leaving your mouth, followed by a wave of giggles.

‘i could spend the rest of my life like that.’ he murmured, each word in between kisses as he continued on. ‘with you. you’re my favorite place.’

‘you’re sweet.’ you mumbled, hands reaching out to wrap around his neck. ‘that’s almost unlike you.’

‘i’m always sweet. you’d just rather watch videos of baby geese over spending time with your incredible boyfriend.’

you rolled your eyes dramatically, and yet still leaned into his touch when his hand came up to the side of your face, gently caressing your cheek as he leaned in to kiss you again. you could spend the rest of your evening and night like this - tangled up in a playful game of smooches, forgetting everything else and having your attention on him and him only. the night air was getting chilly, though: and with that your eyelids got heavy, body growing more tired with each passing minute as you put your head down on yuma’s lap, his fingers gently threading through your hair.

yuma leaned down to kiss your forehead, eyes filled with adoration.

‘should we go back inside, sweetness?’ he mumbled quietly. ‘it’s getting cold. don’t want you to get sick.’

you nodded, a low hum leaving your lips as you nuzzled into his lap even more, eyes closed as if you were nearing sleep - and yuma could feel it in the way your body eased up and your breathing steadied and slowed down.

‘alright. let’s get you to bed, hm? you’ll get cuddles there.’

you smiled, eyes slightly opening up for just a second to look up at him.

‘as long as you’re here with me, i’ll be happy.’

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‘missed this so much.’ he groaned under his breath, eyes flickering to your lips before coming back up, meeting with yours. his gaze was dark, filled with desire and a sense of possessiveness: something you haven’t seen from him yet.

he took a step closer - hand leaving your waist to reach out and brush his hair away from his face.

‘missed my girl so much.’

his lips latched onto yours before you were even able to form a thought about what he said, about what that statement indicated for the future of you both. but that wasn’t relevant now - his hands found their way under your shirt once more, tongue licking along your bottom lip as to see if you’d let him deepen the kiss, and suddenly all of your senses were taken over by the sheer bliss and pleasure of this moment.

your hands reached for his shirt, tugging at the hem of the black material. nicholas chuckled, clearly amused with your actions.

‘want me to undress so much, huh?’ he mumbled, a hint of humour in his voice. you shot him a pleading look and his lips almost immediately curved up into the sly smile you’ve seen thousands of times. ‘you’ll have to wait for that a little longer, darling.’

he chuckled at your annoyed expression, but quickly took action to change it into one of shock when his hands lifted you up effortlessly, the veins on his arms flexing subtly in the process.

nicholas continued kissing you - he was too starved to survive without his lips on you for too long - as he led the two of you towards your couch. he sat down, grip firm on your waist as he guided you down and onto his lap. you could feel his fingertips moving higher: now lightly grazing the skin of your back, trailing little patterns on your shoulders, your sides, around your bra. the touches sent shivers through your whole body, heat rising up to your cheeks.

and judging by his smug expression, nicholas noticed the effect he had on you.

‘couldn’t stop thinking about you all week.’ he muttered, voice low, eyes looking up at yours as his hands rode up your torso, tugging at your shirt while at it. ‘about how… jealous i got when i saw you with that guy last week. couldn’t stand seeing my girl with someone else.’

his eyes roamed over your face - searching for any signs to stop, any hesitation on your part. any slight indication that what he said made you uncomfortable: had it been the case, he would have backed away immediately.

‘your girl?’ your voice came out smaller than you had anticipated, a hint of surprise in your voice. nicholas couldn’t help but smile.

‘yeah.’ he mumbled, hand coming up to rest on the side of your neck, while the other kept you steady on his lap. ‘only if you let me have you for myself, darling.’

you didn’t answer - not with words, anyways. being around nicholas has taught you that with him, the more efficient way to convey your feelings is with your actions.

his eyes widened when he felt your lips on his once again; the movement so sudden it shocked even him. and yet he recovered quickly - deepening the kiss with intense vigour, breaking it only for the few seconds it took you to pull his shirt over his head and throw it on the floor, right next to the sofa.

nicholas chuckled as you stared at his naked torso, eyes filled with desire.

‘you missed me this much?’ he teased, a hand on your lower back pulling you closer to him. even through the material of your shirt you could feel the heat radiating off his skin, the sensation almost dizzying.

‘don’t get too cocky, now. you’re the one who came here like an animal in heat.’ you mumbled. and yet your body betrayed you - nicholas noticed the way your breath hitched when his face inched closer, the way your heart rate sped up, the goosebumps running along your arms.

‘and yet you’re the one who’s almost putty in my hands.’ his voice was low, barely audible as his hand gently squeezed your waist, and you hated that he was right - a gasp leaving your lips at his action, making nicholas grin even more.

he leaned in slowly and you felt excitement pinging in your chest, only for him to move in a completely different direction than you thought - lips right by your ear, a moment of silence filled only with the undeniable tension between the two of you.

‘should we take it to the bedroom then, sweetheart?‘

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and you weren’t alone, either. given that the apartment was a two bedroom one as opposed to his, it was only rational that you brought a roommate with you - a roommate he’d learned to be your childhood best friend, minju, one that you’ve grown so close with that the two of you not only stuck together throughout the entirety of high school but also all the way to university.

he saw the two of you on your first day, carrying numerous boxes of various sizes, chirping excitedly about finally being out of your family house and getting to be more independent. he walked a few meters behind, carrying his weekly groceries, headphones on but no music playing. he had to discreetly learn something about his new neighbours - and listening intently to your conversation was a great way to do that without having to actually get to know either of you. a perfect solution for dongmin, especially considering that you were far from silent: mumbling about anything and everything all the way up the stairs and down the hall right to the door of your apartment.

normally, he would lend a helping hand and offer to carry some of the boxes - neighbour courtesy, or whatever people called it. but he had deadlines to meet for his job and a project he couldn’t wait on continuing. he quickly slid into his apartment and locked the door behind him, leaving the introductions to his new neighbours for another day. not that he was particularly awaiting that moment: he was rather indifferent to it at that point.

but he couldn’t escape the chaos that ensued from the moment you stepped foot into the building.

dongmin first met you when getting back from a particularly long hangout with his friends - a monthly game night arranged by jaehyun. the evening was full of chaos and arguing over whose house rules were closest to the actual rules of the games played. when the meeting finally wrapped up, it was already 2am. the only thing dongmin wanted was to quietly retreat to his apartment and get straight into bed.

he stood inside the elevator, eyes half opened, waiting for the doors to close. as soon as they started moving, he noticed someone slipping inside at the very last minute - stopping the doors in its movements for a few seconds.

his eyes laid on you and he couldn’t keep a straight face, brows furrowing in confusion, amusement, even.

there you stood, breathing heavily, a bag of snacks in one hand and your phone in the other. it wasn’t anything special - he completely understood the idea of late night cravings from time to time. what caught him off-guard more than anything was your outfit.

dongmin liked to think of himself as someone who dresses well. he took pride in the curated collection of clothes he owned, a collection perfectly encapsulating his personal style and the way he wanted to present himself. despite that, he was never the one to judge.

but the sight of you in a shrek themed bathrobe, pink sweats and the cutest pair of wiener dog slippers definitely made him chuckle a little too loud.

you shot him a look the moment you heard the sound come out of his mouth, a slightest hint of embarrassment visible by the deep pink shade gracing the tips of your ears.

‘oh, come on. it’s not like i went out for a fancy dinner wearing that.’ you argued, voice cutting through the silence in the elevator.

‘noted.’ dongmin nodded, now staring at the elevator doors in front of him, waiting for it to get to its destination. ‘still quite an odd choice, though.’

‘it’s called dressing for comfort, mr. emo. do you own any clothes that aren’t black?’

he could hear the playfulness in your tone, giving you a slightly offended look . still, you didn’t miss the way his lips curved up into a grin at your comment.

‘i do.’ he stated.

‘socks don’t count.’

‘i still do.’ he could hear you chuckle as he mumbled, the elevator doors finally opening on your floor. the two of you stepped out of it, heading down the hallway in silence - the only sound being from the plastic bag and snacks inside of it. ‘and don’t call me that.’ dongmin added, right as he was about to open the door to his apartment.

‘what, mr. emo?’ you asked jokingly, purposefully repeating the nickname. the boy frowned. ‘well, i don’t know your name.’

‘it’s dongmin.’

you quickly told him yours, a smile on your face as you saw him nod, disappearing inside his apartment a few seconds after.

dongmin couldn’t help but sigh. he could already tell you were a chaos incarnate - something that would throw him off of his perfect routine of tranquility and peace. and yet that wasn’t the worst thing.

the worst thing was that he caught his lips curving up into a smile while thinking of you.

dongmin has grown accustomed to living across from a chaos incarnate - the past few months might’ve changed his life greatly, but he didn’t seem to be complaining much. at least not anymore. he still wasn’t the biggest fan of the unpredictability of your actions, never knowing whether he’d not see you leave your apartment for a week or have to get through your bizarre stories during an elevator ride together for five days straight.

to him, you were like a hurricane - he never knew what you’d do next, where the wind would take you. it was quite amusing, though, your irregularity. he had to admit.

dongmin stepped out of the elevator, grocery bags in both his hands, headphones on as his newly perfected playlist graced his ears. the day had been particularly good for him - no changes of plans, no disturbances at work, no crowds cramming in the public transport on his way home.

then his eyes landed on you.

first thing he noticed was that you were sitting on the floor in front of your apartment, which seemed strange enough on it’s own. still he could’ve chalked it up to an argument with your roommate or anything of that sort. but the more he noticed, the less sense it made for him - the fact that you were still in your work clothes, the bag you used everyday propped against the wall right next to you, the frown on your face.

he took out his phone to pause the music, taking his headphones off in one swift motion.

‘something happened?’ dongmin’s voice cut through your thoughts, you finally noticing his tall frame hovering over you as you looked up at him, his expression full of confusion.

you sighed. deep. frustrated.

‘it’s stupid.’ you muttered standing up, dusting off your pants in the process. ‘you gotta promise not to laugh.’

dongmin gave you an amused smirk, tilting his head to the side just slightly.

‘what, did you forget your keys or something?’

you looked away in embarrassment. that action alone was enough of an answer.

‘well, when is minji coming back?’ he asked and your expression shifted uncomfortably, like you couldn’t bear to say the answer out loud.

‘in two days.’ you mumbled.

‘oh.’

dongmin kept his poker face for around five seconds before letting out a laugh, the frown on your face deepening even more as a result, as well as the redness of your cheeks.

‘it’s not funny!’ you argued, trying to sound convincing. but it was all to no avail - dongmin just couldn’t take you seriously at that moment, the whole situation being so bizarre to him he couldn’t help but continue laughing.

‘alright, alright.’ he seemed to calm down only after you threatened to hit him with your bag, hands up in a pacifist pose. ‘can’t you stay at your parent’s house?’

‘they live three hours away.’

‘friends?’

‘i tried, but they all either have plans for the weekend or are out of the city.’

dongmin nodded slowly, taking in all of the information provided.

and then he sighed.

‘you can stay at my place.’ he muttered, and your head shot up so fast you swore you could feel it in your neck for the next few hours.

‘you don’t have to do that.’ you quickly answered, afraid of inconveniencing him. dongmin shook his head.

‘i know i don’t.’ he stated, voice stoic and flat, as if he’d just said the most obvious thing on the planet. ‘if i didn’t want to help, i wouldn’t even offer.’

you let out a little hum, still sceptical to the idea.

‘are you sure i’m not inconveniencing you?’

‘i’m sure.’

your arms loosened up hearing those words, finally giving in. dongmin saw the change instantly, hand reaching to grab the keys to his apartment from where they rested in his pockets the last few hours.

his apartment was everything you could’ve expected from him. seeing it for the first time only made you realise that he tailored it to himself almost to a t.

the decor consisted mostly of anything music related - vinyls and cds of his favorite bands, an electric guitar standing in the corner next to the sofa, an old vinyl player placed, ironically, next to a new and fancy gaming console. most of the furniture was black, with the exception of the sofa and the armchair settled right next to it.

you stood in the hall, admiring the interior, while dongmin excused himself to his room.

and then you heard it.

a quiet meowing sound emerged from the kitchen and, soon enough, you were met with a tiny head full of black fur, green eyes carefully looking out from behind the kitchen island. the creature moved. slowly. carefully. assessing whether or not you were a threat to her meanwhile you stood frozen in place, eyes locked on the little ball of fur heading your way.

then the realisation hit.

dongmin has a little kitten.

a little kitten that was currently standing right at your feet, sniffing you with the carefulness so visible on her tiny face it almost made you melt right then and there.

‘i see you already met mochi.’

seeing her owner coming out from his room, mochi immediately ran up to him, a purr of satisfaction as dongmin scratched her behind the ears and patted her head gently. a warm sensation ran through your body at the sight of this sweet moment and you swore you’ve never seen dongmin smile as brightly as he did at his kitten right now.

‘i didn’t know you had a cat.’ you commented quietly, careful to not startle the kitten by being too loud.

‘yeah. i guess i don’t share that much about myself.’ dongmin’s answer came out almost like a whisper as he looked up at you from where he was crouching down. ‘wanna pet her?’

the sparkle in your eyes upon hearing that proposition was enough for the boy to know you were more than happy to do so, slowly but surely leaning down and eventually kneeling right next to him. you fought to ignore the uncomfortableness of your outfit as you did so, all your focus on mochi and her sweet purrs.

she noticed your presence and tensed up for a second, as if alerted of an intruder.

‘don’t worry, she won’t bite you.’ dongmin’s words cut through the sudden silence, a soft smile gracing his features. ‘reach out your hand slowly. let her get settled in with your presence.’

you did just as he said. mochi moved towards you slowly, big green eyes focused on your hand, then your face. she sniffed you just like before - this time a bit longer, as if deciding whether or not to trust you. you didn’t make another move, too afraid to startle her, but then you noticed mochi’s body leaning into your hand, almost asking for you to pet her.

and you obliged, with the biggest smile on your face, so in the moment that you didn’t notice dongmin’s soft gaze was not on mochi now, but rather on you, his smile barely noticeably growing bigger as well.

‘i also got you some clothes.’ dongmin mumbled after a minute or two, handing you a folded pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. ‘figured you’d want to change into something more comfortable after work. oh, and you can use the bathroom if you want to take a shower or anything. i’ll give you a towel.’

you thanked him quietly, tips of your ears turning red. you prayed he wouldn’t notice.

mochi could sense her time with you was slowly coming to an end by the way you stopped petting her for a moment and meowed, as if asking for her attention back. dongmin chuckled at her antics, gently taking her up into his arms as he stood up.

‘mochi seems quite fond of you already.’ he stated, giving the kitten light pats on the head. ‘that’s surprising. she usually hides in my room or under the sofa whenever new people come here.’

your face was beaming with satisfaction at that statement. being appreciated and chosen by people was surely a great feeling but getting that blessing from a kitten was on a whole other level and you weren’t exactly sure whether you’ll recover from that level of praise. you’ll probably be raving about it to your friends for the next few weeks, you thought.

‘i guess i’m just that likeable.’ you chuckled standing in front of the bathroom door as dongmin handed you the towel you intended to use. the boy nodded.

‘yeah. be careful, though. she might like you too much and you’ll have to come over here more often.’ he joked. you could feel your cheeks turning pink for some reason, that familiar tingling feeling settling in your stomach. his words shouldn’t have that type of effect - he didn’t even say anything about him wanting you there.

and yet the blush on your face continued to spread at a rapid pace after you closed the bathroom door and looked at your face in the mirror above the sink, exhaling a deep breath you didn’t even know you were holding in.

you could hear sounds of the tv when you exited the bathroom. dongmin’s shirt was loose on you, and you wondered whether the sweats he’s given you to wear were truly his - they seemed surprisingly small to belong to him, but you’ve chalked it down to them being from when he was younger.

dongmin’s eyes shot up from the tv when he heard you approaching. he was sitting down on the couch, legs spread comfortably, already having changed into some home appropriate clothes, too.

he looked up at you and, for a moment, his expression changed. it was barely noticeable - pupils dilating ever so slightly, the corner of his lip lifting up into a small smile.

‘the shirt suits you.’ he commented, back to his neutral expression, now facing the tv. ‘you should keep it.’

the comment left you a little puzzled and even more flustered than before as you sat down on the other end of the couch.

your eyes turned to the tv screen, watching as he searched through the game catalog on his console, the focus on his face indicating he was looking for something specific. soon enough, he found it - putting the controller down next to him to turn to you once more.

‘wanna play?’ his question echoed through the room, the boy motioning towards the tv screen. ‘or are you too tired after being so scatterbrained today?’

even in his words you could feel the slight smile tugging at his lips, your situation still greatly humoring him.

‘it’s not funny.’ you mumbled.

‘it very much is.’ he answered, the grin on his face only growing when he saw the annoyed look on your face. ‘come on, humor me. i can’t play this one alone.’

you looked at the screen then back at dongmin, eventually giving in. your fingers brushed his when you took the controller from him - the touch lingering just a second too long for you to disregard it, the warmth of his fingers being all that remained from it.

dongmin seemed unfazed, though, as he stood up from the couch under the excuse of going to get some snacks and quickly hit the bathroom. he came back soon after with a bowl of popcorn in hand, tactically placing it in between the two of you. instinctively, you scooted closer - now not occupying the very corner of the couch but rather the middle of it, close enough to comfortably reach for the snacks as he focused on turning the game on.

it was no secret that he was attractive, but you never really got to see him outside of the elevator run-ins and small talk on the way to your respective apartments. this time, though, you got a chance to finally look at dongmin - and somehow, from up close, he looked even better than from afar.

not only that, but he also had an annoyingly perfect side profile.

you redirected your focus onto the tv the moment his eyes moved, as if being caught staring would’ve been the end of the world. and maybe, in your head, it was - but for now, to not draw suspicion, all your focus was on the opening scene of the game.

it was extremely fun to play - apart from dongmin’s little digs at your skills and the annoying boss fight you had to finish with your eyes growing heavy and your focus shifting from the screen to the idea of going to sleep.

dongmin noticed.

he paused the game right after you’ve defeated the boss, earning an annoyed grumble from you.

‘come on, i was watching the cut scene!’

‘your eyes look like they’re struggling to stay open.’ he stated matter-of-factly, arms crossed as he looked at you. ‘you should probably get some sleep.’

you looked up at him, opening your eyes a little wider almost as if to prove a point.

‘nuh-uh. i’m good.’ you protested, body reclining further into the sofa. ‘i wanna watch a movie.’

dongmin raised his eyebrows, amused.

‘you won’t even survive through the first fifteen minutes.’ he stated, a sly grin pulling at the corners of his lips.

‘wanna bet on it?’ your words came out almost like a challenge and from the change in dongmin’s eyes you immediately knew he was in. ‘if you lose, you pay for my next groceries.’

‘and if you lose?’ he asked. you shook your head.

‘that won’t happen.’ you said confidently, arms crossed over your chest.

dongmin just chuckled, plopping down on the couch next to you.

‘sure it won’t.’

you woke up to the smell of clean sheets and coffee.

the pillows were soft and almost too comfortable, so much so that you didn’t want to move from the bed. the sheets shielded you from the outside world, keeping you warm and satisfied. but then your mind slowly started waking up and realising a few things. main one being that you do not remember falling asleep on the bed.

you jolted up into a sitting position too fast, your head feeling a little dizzy from the sudden motion. a few seconds passed and you stood up slowly, making your way out of dongmin’s room.

he was standing by the kitchen counter - back facing you, a one of his playlists playing quietly in the background. he was in his own world. mochi was walking around her owner, taking little steps as she looked up, hoping to see what dongmin was doing up there where she couldn’t reach.

although you tried your best to be quiet, dongmin still heard your steps as you approached the kitchen. he turned around, eyes scanning your still half-asleep frame and smiled softly.

‘good morning.’ he said, his focus back on whatever he was doing in the kitchen. ‘your coffee’s on the kitchen counter.’

you sat down on one of the tall stools, the smell of coffee already taking over your senses. a chuckle left your lips as you picked up the cup and examined it - it must’ve been a gift from one of his friends, a silly picture of dongmin and one of his friends wearing cherry-shaped hats adorning it. as much as you didn’t enjoy the bitterness of coffee most times, dongmin made the taste a perfect balance between sweet and bitter.

‘you lost the bet.’ dongmin broke the silence, setting two plates of homemade pancakes down on the kitchen counter: one in front of you, one in front of the empty chair next to you. ‘five minutes into the movie and you were already snoring on my arm.’

dongmin could see the embarrassment creeping up onto your face with each passing second, a laugh escaping his lips at the sight.

‘don’t tell me you carried me to your bed.’

‘i did.’

the tips of your ears were bright red by now. you decided to focus on eating to at least partially ignore heat that was now rising to your cheeks, too. but you couldn’t really stay quiet for too long.

‘so what do i have to do for losing?’ you asked, curiosity getting better of you instead of pretending the bet never took place. ‘you didn’t give any rules of your own.’

‘yeah. because you were oh so sure you’d win.’ he mumbled.

you shot him a deadly glare, fork halfway to your mouth.

‘alright, alright.’ he pleaded, hands up in a defensive position. ‘i think i have something in mind, though.’

‘hm?’

‘you have to come stop by my apartment more often.’ dongmin’s words were fast, so much so that if you weren’t listening intently you wouldn’t have been able to catch all the words. you caught the slight awkwardness in his voice, the way his eyes drifted away from you. ‘because mochi seems to like you a lot, you know.’

you smiled slightly, eyes falling down to the plate in front of you. any hopes of your cheeks not being flushed were long gone by now.

after a minute of silence, your eyes drifted to the side, towards where he was sitting. dongmin was already facing you, staring intently as if awaiting an answer.

‘well, i guess i cannot disappoint her then.’ you chuckled, taking another bite of your food. ‘i’ll just make sure that next time it won’t be a result of my stupidity.’

‘i don’t care what the reason is, as long as there is a next time.’

the way dongmin mumbled it quietly under his breath made you think he didn’t intend for the words to leave his lips - like a thought that he accidentally made out loud.

each smile, each word leaving your lips with that excited tone of yours, each light graze of your shoulder against his as you walked side by side made him even more anxious, even more uneasy. even more stressed about what he had planned for that evening.

‘hello, earth to dongmin!’ you exclaimed, waving a hand in front of his face. ‘did you hear what i just said?’

he shook his head lightly - eyes coming in contact with yours and immediately lighting up at the sight of the excitement on your face.

‘sorry.’ he mumbled, hand reaching up to move the strands of his brown hair away from his face. ‘could you repeat, please?’

‘of course i can, dummy.’ you giggled and dongmin couldn’t help but smile - lips curving up in a way different than when he’s around his friends or family. this smile was more sincere, filled with adoration. ‘i said that there's a photobooth across the street. wanna take some pictures?’

dongmin couldn’t say no. not when you looked at him with that beautiful smile of yours, eyes shining with excitement so youthful and childlike it was almost endearing.

so he let himself be dragged to yet another place - posing for pictures in the booth, taking a walk through the park and stopping to pet every dog on your way. and eventually, the day came to an end - and he still hasn’t done what he had promised himself to do.

so he resorted to plan b.

he said goodbye to you at the entrance to your apartment with a quick hug and a promise of scheduling another hangout soon. he watched as you closed the door behind you then sighed - footsteps slowly but surely heading for the elevator.

the moment you entered your apartment, you reached inside your bag - eager to find the pictures from the photobooth and stick them up with all the other pictures of you and your friends. your fingertips brushed over a piece of paper and you instinctively took it out of the bag, only to be met with something entirely different than a picture.

a letter. sealed with a baby pink wax seal, in a white envelope just slightly worn out at the edges.

so you opened it.

‘to my dearest y/n,

if you’re reading this, that means i was too much of a coward to say it to your face today - which, to be perfectly honest with you, is very likely to happen. that’s just the effect you have on me: your presence alone makes me nervous, and all of a sudden all of the words i wish to say seem to get stuck in my throat, unable to get out no matter my efforts.

i never really cared for someone as much as i care for you. you occupy my each and every thought, no matter night or day, no matter what’s happening around me. you’re a significant presence in my life, one which i never want to get rid of - just the sight of you is enough to make the worst of my days into a great one, your smile could light up the entire world brighter than the sun could ever dream of. i’ll admit that i’m afraid; but i could no longer keep the truth away from you. i could no longer lie to myself and pretend that this feeling of mine hasn’t bloomed and flourished to the point where it is impossible to keep it hidden anymore. so i figured that it’s worth the risk.

if i hadn’t made it clear yet, by my actions or the contents of this letter, i love you. i love you and i have loved you for an awfully long while now - what happens now is entirely up to you.

love,

dongmin.’

the speed with which you ran out of your apartment bordered that of an olympic athlete.

you took the stairs: opting for the quicker option between them and the elevator, knowing that the latter was probably currently occupied by someone else. even when you felt you were getting out of breath, you didn’t slow down - not until your eyes caught the sight of dongmin on the other side of the street, earphones already in with his playlist blasting at high volume as he headed home.

you reached for the sleeve for his jacket and almost yanked it to make him turn around to face you, startling him in the process. his eyes softened when he realised it was just you - standing in front of him out of breath, visibly tired by the run you’ve just finished.

dongmin opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted almost immediately as your hands reached for the hem of his t-shirt, tugging him closer as his lips crashed with yours. although initially surprised, he soon melted into the kiss - hand gently reaching for your cheek, thumb grazing soft patterns against its skin.

‘so that’s why you were acting all weird today.’ you whispered, a giggle escaping your lips as you broke the kiss, the faintest trace of blush forming on your cheeks. dongmin nodded - still a little shocked on the outside, but feeling a wave of relief washing over him on the inside. ‘you’re a dummy for thinking i would ever reject you.’

dongmin chuckled.

‘i’m alright with being a dummy.’ he said, hand tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear in slow, careful movements. ‘as long as that dummy remains yours.’

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jaehyun kissed you with the fervor of a starved man - as if the feeling of your burning skin under his lips would give him salvation from this mundane world, a reason to keep going. his hand slid down the wall slowly, inching closer to your waist with delicate, feather-like touches, almost in perfect contrast with his mouth; now travelling higher up your jaw, each kiss closer to your lips.

you stopped him before he managed to reach them; you hand gripping his arm tightly, face moving slightly to the side, the only direction you could use to shield yourself from continuing whatever this was.

‘what exactly is your motive with this, huh?’ your words came out a whisper, eyes looking around the to check if there was truly no one there. even at this late hour, you could never be sure - the library wasn’t exactly the most private of places, after all. ‘is this your new way of making my life miserable?’

jaehyun chuckled, his free hand squeezing your waist gently.

‘oh, you got it all wrong.’ his voice was low and quiet as he leaned in, face just inches from yours. ‘i just love spending time around you. besides, let’s be honest with ourselves for a second - you’re enjoying this too.’

you shook your head in protest; an action which seemed to humor jaehyun even more.

he leaned in even closer now - the hand on your waist sliding to the small of your back, his breath steady and warm against your ear.

‘then why are you still here, sweetheart?’

you hated how your stomach fluttered at the nickname. what you hated even more, though, was that myung jaehyun was right. there was a very thin line between hatred and love - disdain and admiration. a line which you’ve crossed a long time ago: and a line which didn’t seem to be any of jaehyun’s concerns. he knew what he was feeling from the very beginning.

jaehyun kissed you and you didn’t stop him; hands landing on his torso, grabbing handfuls of his shirt as his lips attacked yours, his presence overwhelming all your senses, body pressed against yours. he licked along your lower lip, deepening the kiss the moment your lips parted slightly and you didn’t have to look to know that his lips curved up in that annoying grin you detested - or found annoyingly attractive.

‘see? i was right.’ he mumbled against yours lips, words quick as if he physically couldn’t stand parting his lips from yours for too long. ‘you love it as much as i do.’

‘i hate you so much.’ you murmured, arms wrapping around his neck, the kiss filled with so much passion someone could mistake you for a newlywed couple. jaehyun didn’t laugh, didn’t ridicule your words this time; his lips working swiftly against yours, hand leaving your body only for the few seconds it took him to loosen his tie.

‘sure you do, sweetheart.’

a loud sound startled you, your body almost jumping away from jaehyun’s, eyes widened as you carefully scanned the area looking for it’s source. jaehyun didn’t seem as concerned about it, though - slowly approaching your figure once again, his hands back on your waist in no time. you shot him a warning look; and yet you couldn’t deny that parts of you liked having him this close, enjoyed his presence more than your pride would like to admit.

‘relax.’ he whispered, thumbs rubbing slow, lazy circles on your sides. ‘it was probably just someone standing up from their chair. the seats are on the other side of the library, remember?’

his words somehow made you ease up; almost leaning into his touch, letting out a breath of relief as jaehyun’s hand crept up to the back of your neck, resting on the side of your face. he leaned into to kiss you once more - and that’s when you heard someone’s steps.

jaehyun sighed: the interruption could only mean people were gathering up at the library for some late night studying, which in turn meant no more privacy. not enough privacy, at least.

both of you pretended to be very invested in looking through the books about self betterment and being your own boss as the culprit of the steps walked by, shooting a curious glance your way before walking to the next section. jaehyun stuck out his tongue in the guy’s direction - a surprised look on your face when his action actually earned a giggle from you. to be fair, you were surprised yourself; but you couldn’t take it back now.

jaehyun checked his phone, seemingly to look at the time, then cursed under his breath.

‘i have to tutor my idiot of a friend in 15 minutes.’ he mumbled, noticing the flicker of a frown on your face, your expression almost disappointed. ‘don’t worry sweetheart - i’ll be back to bothering you soon.’

he disappeared just like that; steps getting quieter and quieter as he got closer to the exit, the sudden lack of his presence making you feel uneasy. you felt your phone buzz, though - seemingly forgetting to put it on silent mode before, a notification from none other than myung jaehyun popping up on your lock screen.

‘let me prove my intentions to you - my dorm at 6:30 tomorrow. i’ll cook you a nice dinner for cutting our little rendezvous short ;)’

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each moment with you felt like the most special thing one could experience in life - hearing your laugh was like listening to your favorite song for the first time, seeing you smile was like watching the sunset atop the roof on a warm summer’s evening. but i shouldn’t- i can’t be dwelling on these memories right now. for your own good.

that is not what this letter is for.

it physically hurts me to write this, but it’s better to give an explanation than to leave without a word, right? there is no proper way to do this anyways.

by the time this reaches you, i’ll probably be far away on the other side of the globe - away from your smile, your beautiful eyes, your melodic voice which always lulled me to sleep. away from the laugh that warmed my heart even on the coldest of days, from your little quirks and habits i adored with all my being. you won’t be my darling anymore.

you won’t be mine anymore. i won’t be yours, either. or maybe i will: as much as i am forcing myself not to. now that i think about it, this letter will only hurt you… just skim through it and toss it away, okay? don’t let your pretty little head worry about it too much.

i always prayed that we were written in the stars, meant to outlive them and this world as a whole. but i was wrong. oh, so very wrong. if our fate was ever written in the stars, we’d be starcrossed lovers - our love forever attached to this short lived moment, a dream of an eternity that was not meant to last. an eternity which i wanted more than anything else in this godforsaken world.

it is disgusting of me to convey all that through a letter, and for that i am truly and utterly sorry, but i hope you understand. i’m afraid i wouldn’t have been able to say it all to your face: to watch your heart shatter into pieces, without being able to offer you any comfort, for comfort in a situation like this would only twist the knife further into your chest.

i know it won’t be easy for you at first - lord knows it’ll be the hardest thing i’ve ever had to live through - but with time, the ache will wilt away. i need you to promise me, no, promise yourself, that you won’t let the sadness consume you. please, don’t be gloomy, don’t be blue. my absence will not be the end of your world: soon you’ll forget me and the agonising darkness will loosen it’s shackles. the world is yours to take, and you should take advantage of every opportunity thrown your way. my presence would’ve only held you back, so promise me, my dear darling, that you’ll live your life to the fullest. be joyful, go on adventures, do everything you’ve ever dreamed of doing. enjoy everything to it’s fullest extent and forget about my existence ever intertwining with yours.

i wish you all that’s best in life - your beautiful soul deserves nothing less, after all. but for the good of both of us, i cannot be there to witness it. i won’t try to contact you, no matter how strong the urge, no matter how painfully my heart will remind me of your absence. i’ll cheer quietly, from a distance: and i’ll always hope and pray that this world gives you everything your heart desires. everything i wanted to give you but couldn’t.

make sure to smile a lot, will you? light up the lives of all the people surrounding you. and don’t hold onto this letter for too long - it’ll only be a painful reminder of something that was not meant to be ours.

sincerely,

your dearest sungho.’

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his eyes lingered on you the entire night - watching your every movement carefully with the brightest smile his friends have ever seen from him, an unmistakable happiness coursing through his entire body and radiating from him, almost infectious to those around him. had his happiness been any less it would’ve been a crime: for to marry such an extraordinary partner and not be ecstatic beyond belief one would need to have no heart beating in their chest. but jeon wonwoo had a heart - a heart which had been given the most pleasant task of this world. a task which, to him, was almost as natural as breathing.

a task of loving you for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part.

and when all the guests left and only the two of you remained on the dimly lit dance floor, wonwoo knew that these words were only a beginning: a humble beginning to the best days of his life.

‘what’re you thinking of?’ he mumbled, placing a soft kiss to your temple as his eyes met yours, the room almost surprisingly quiet as compared to the lively celebrations that took place mere hours ago. you looked up at him and smiled warmly - leaning in to plant a soft kiss to his lips, a glimmer in your eye which could only mean you had an idea.

‘we should have one more dance.’

‘hm?’

‘last dance of the wedding.’ you explained, voice a quiet hum in the large room. ‘no eyes watching our every move, no cameras capturing the day, no unpredictable interruptions. just us and our memory to remember this special moment.’

it took one look into your eyes for wonwoo to give in and agree. how could he not when it was his beautiful wife’s wish?

despite the day tiring you out you still squealed with excitement, and wonwoo couldn’t help but find it the most adorable thing in the world - eyes following your figure as you ran up to the speakers, your feet bare on the ground as you long got rid of the heels you wore for the ceremony and most of the party, not wanting to cause yourself more discomfort than needed. you searched the song up on the laptop situated next to the speakers and hit play with the swiftness of someone who knew exactly what tune they wanted to play for this special occasion.

wonwoo recognised the song from the first note alone.

the song that you always mentioned loving whenever you’d hear it on the radio, in the car or at the mall. the song you always hummed along to or sang excitedly depending on where you currently were. the song which has topped your streaming statistics each year. the song you always mentioned reminded you of him - your love for it almost as big as your love for your dear husband.

the same song that played in the restaurant he’d rented out in its entirety the night he proposed to you.

wonwoo chuckled as he saw you walked back to him - your smile vibrant, your dress beautiful, moves still graceful despite being up on your feet since early morning. he’s never seen someone more beautiful than you.

his hands reached out, a gentle grip on your hips as your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him as close as humanly possible: enough to feel the warmth of his body, enough to feel his breath fanning against the crook of your neck. in that simple moment nothing else mattered - just you, your husband, and the love between you so overflowing it spilled out of you at all times.

you swayed to the music softly, bodies tired and yet still refusing to give out, even if just for these next few minutes.

‘you look like you’ve got something on your mind, dear husband.’ you mumbled with your eyes looking up at him, a small giggle escaping your lips at the title you used to address him. wonwoo’s cheeks flushed a light shade of pink, eyes looking away from yours for just a spare second.

‘it’s nothing too important.’

‘well, humor me. i want to know what’s on your mind.’

one of wonwoo’s hands moved from your waist up, resting on the side of your face, thumb caressing your cheek in gentle circles.

‘just thinking.’ he murmured, a soft smile planted on his lips.

‘of?’

‘of how i’m the luckiest guy to ever walk this earth.’ he answered, leaning down for a kiss. you obliged happily - lips connecting with his in a gentle motion. you pulled him closer, if that was even humanly possible: so much so that you could feel his heart beat in perfect sync with yours, a harmony possible only to those who were truly meant for each other.

you broke the kiss first - taking in a much needed breath of air, face heating up as you rested your forehead against his, the song nearing it’s end.

‘i’m glad it’s you.’ you mumbled, just enough for wonwoo to hear. ‘i couldn’t imagine this with anybody else.’

‘well, now you have me.’ he answered, voice low. ‘for eternity and whatever exists beyond it.’

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he chuckled - partially at seungcheol’s drunken attempt at telling a joke, partially out of amusement at just how hard you were pretending not to notice him.

you dipped into another room after a minute or two - making sure you don’t spill your drink, dissappearing in the crowd of people. but not before glancing back just for a split second. your eyes connected with jeonghan’s: your gaze playful, a hint of a smile on your face.

that was enough for him to get the memo.

the house was heavily crowded - but not all corners of it. there were certain places where you could still get privacy. and, to seungcheol’s disadvantage, both you and jeonghan knew them the best.

his rules were set firmly from the very beginning: he didn’t want any of his friends dating his sister. no buts, no maybes. unbeknownst to him, it was already happening - and what you don’t know can’t hurt you, right?

jeonghan’s lips were on yours the moment you closed the door to seungcheol’s office - your back pressed against the wall as his hands slipped down to your waist, rubbing your sides with gentle but swift movements.

his kiss was filled with fervor; rough and passionate. jeonghan kissed you like he was running out of time - and, given the secrecy of your relationship, you could say that he was.

‘you look mesmerising today, angel.’ he mumbled in between kisses, lips struggling to stay away from yours for too long. his left hand trailed higher, resting on the small of your back as he pulled you even closer towards him, with you standing between his legs. ‘it’s difficult to keep my hands to myself.’

‘then don’t.’ you looked up to meet his eyes, offering him a sweet smile as your hand toyed with the hem of his shirt, tugging on it so you’d reach his face.

jeonghan couldn’t stop himself from grinning, lips inches away from yours.

‘oh, and what would your poor older brother say if he saw us here?’ he cooed, a hint of teasing in his tone. he rested his hand on the side of your neck, thumb gently brushing your cheek. ‘with his best friend, of all people.’

‘seungcheol’s not here.’ you whispered, sings of impatience showing on your face as your eyes dropped to your boyfriend’s lips and then back up, much to jeonghan’s amusement. ‘he won’t know.’

you leaned in to finally kiss him again - eager to feel his lips on yours once more - but were met with nothing as you looked up at his face, now inches away from yours. the playful grin on his face was enough to know what he was doing, and you couldn’t help but frown.

‘hannie.’ you mumbled with a hint of annoyance. ‘we don’t have much time.’

jeonghan chuckled, seemingly giving in.

‘just wanted to see you frustrated.’ he admitted, leaning down and finally kissing you again - this time slower, more sensual. his lips soon left yours, trailing little kisses down your jaw, neck, under your ear, you would lie if you said you weren’t enjoying yourself.

the slight buzz of the alcohol mixed with the pleasure clouded your senses: so much so that you didn’t object when you felt him nibble at the skin under your ear, gasping at the sensation of him gently sucking at the spot, then kissing it to soothe the feeling.

jeonghan’s lips left your neck, eyes observing the spot where they were just seconds ago. he smiled, pride beaming from him - and only then did you realise what he was actually staring at.

‘a hickey? really?’ you whisper-yelled, furrowing your brows in disbelief. jeonghan laughed at your expression, hand still resting on your waist.

‘i couldn’t help myself.’ he said with no hint of shame whatsoever, perfectly satisfied with his work. he leaned in closer to yours ear, making your breath hitch. ‘you look divine today. i would’ve done more if it wasn’t a pain in the ass to cover up.’

you turned to face him, noses brushing in the process.

‘one is plenty of work to cover up too!’ you argued, trying to ignore the burning of your cheeks, blush spreading through your entire face. ‘you’re insufferable, you know?’

‘and you love it.’ he mumbled, planting another kiss on your lips, laughing right after at the sight of your sulky expression. ‘come on, i’ll buy you some blind-boxes for the inconvenience?’

you rolled your eyes at his offer, but jeonghan still noticed the hint of what seemed to be excitement on your face.

‘alright.’ you mumbled, jeonghan’s face beaming with triumph. ‘should we head back now? seungcheol might notice we’re gone.’

your boyfriend shook his head, brushing a strand of hair away from your face,

‘he’s too drunk to notice, angel.’ he mumbled, hand coming down to yours as he grabbed it gently, fingers intertwining. he leaned in closer, his breath hot against your neck. ‘besides, i still should properly apologise for all the future trouble i just caused you with that hickey, should i not?’

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you hesitated before knocking - the air suddenly feeling heavy around you, doubts forming in your head. not about whether he’d be there - that you were sure of, but of whether he’d want you to be there. whether he’d get excited to see you, eyes lighting up the same way he did at the very beginning - back when the relationship felt like a fairytale, like a beautiful poem written with pink ink, hearts drawn all around it.

and yet when jihoon opened the door he didn’t seem excited nor happy. just… tired.

he let you in without a word, the door closing behind you with a soft thud, footsteps the only sound in the room as you softly sat down on the couch, letting out a shaky breath. jihoon went back to his chair - but not before glancing in your direction, eyes falling down to the bag laying on the small table in front of you. you noticed.

‘oh, right. i brought you some food.’ you mumbled, taking out one of the boxes with utensils and standing up to hand it to him with what you could only describe as your best attempt of a polite smile. jihoon smiled, too - weakly, his lips just barely curving up as his hands brushed against yours, mumbling a quiet ‘thank you’ under his breath.

you could clearly tell he was exhausted - if not by the dark circles under his eyes then by his unusual level of quietness. of course, jihoon wasn’t the most talkative man: that title has surely belonged to soonyoung. but with the expertise of his friends you’ve learned that it was different around you. he was actually more lively, eagerly starting conversations about nothing just to be able to hear the sound of your voice. so his current silence - the coldness, aloofness - hurt even more.

jihoon ate with his back facing you, the backrest of his chair a shield keeping you at a safe distance, just another wall that has built up between the two of you as of late. the silence between you was louder than any arguments or shouting matches could ever be - like a dying flame slowly losing it’s fuel.

‘can we talk?’ your voice came out weaker than you had anticipated. ‘love-‘

‘stop.’ jihoon interrupted you before you could continue, the sound of the nickname feeling like a knife to his chest. he still hasn’t faced you - he wouldn’t dare. ‘just- don’t.’

‘but-‘

‘you’re trying to hold onto something that’s been dead for months. you need to let go.’ his voice was seemingly calm: and yet you could clearly hear the hint of sadness fighting to be seen, the slight crack in his voice. ‘you need to accept that there’s nothing to save here. this relationship has never had a right to work out, it was never meant to last. so please. please, just- stop trying to keep it alive. keep us alive. it’ll only hurt you more.’

‘and what about you?’

jihoon sat there in silence for a few minutes, plastic fork still in his hand, the now empty food container staring back at him, no, mirroring him and his current state. unfilled. hollow. stripped of something that once made him feel special.

he chuckled - airy, a hint of sadness in his voice.

‘no need to worry about me.’

he could hear the muffled sob escaping your lips - a sound which normally would’ve immediately meant he’d be right by your side, arms wrapped around you in the most comforting hug one could ever wish for. this time, he did none of that. he stayed still: heart shattering with each quiet cry leaving your lips, chest aching as he physically restrained himself from standing up from his chair and consoling you.

‘i should leave now, shouldn’t i?’ you sniffled and jihoon could barely bring himself to answer, a quiet, almost inaudible ‘yes’ falling from his lips.

the door closed behind you with a quiet thud. only then did jihoon allow himself to properly pour his feelings out - the tears prickling his eyes for the past minutes bursting out of his eyes like waterfalls of despair. he kept telling himself he made the right choice by letting you go: preventing you from an even bigger heartbreak, from wasting your time on someone who could not give you the time and attention you truly deserved.

and yet he still cried. because deep down, his love for you has never truly wilted - and maybe letting you go was the only true way he was capable of showcasing that. lee jihoon’s one final act of love.

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