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xB: There’s not enough people out there just trying to make people laugh. Like, there’s people out there trying to make people scared, there’s people out there trying to make people broke, there’s people out there trying to make people not exist…w-we got enough of all that. Y’know? Like, if more people just spent time trying to make other people laugh…imagine how much better of a world we would have. Y’know what I mean?
Shauna: —in this room. Okay.
Nom: (away from his mic, shouting) Who the fuck is in this painting?
4c: (high pitched, like he's trying not to laugh) Nom! (4c laughs)
Nom: (away from his mic, still shouting) If I have to look at one more ass on this photo I'm gonna lose it! (Abolish laughs)
CC: Oh, 4c. That's diabolical.
Abolish: I fear where 4c's at.
4c: Is it good?
CC: Yeah, I think it's good.
Abolish: Um? Yeah, pretty good.
4c: Yeah, I think it-it's-if you—oh CC, oh CC, that's so good.
CC: It's—ugh. (the sound of whistling)
Shauna: Oh.
4c: (high pitched) Nom—
Shauna: Oh hi. (sound of gunshot as Shauna shoots CC)
CC: No!
Abolish: Oh.
CC: Yeah. (4c giggles)
4c: I gotta—
Shauna: You were waiting for your demise, (through laughter) you were just waiting it down. But I know 4c's with Nom, I'm gonna let that happen.
Nom: (putting an echo effect on his voice) Where are you?! (Abolish and Shauna laugh)
CC: 4c this is diabolical.
4c: You'll see it eventually. (4c laughs) I think it's pretty decent.
CC: This is a—just the sheer scale of this painting makes it so like—
Abolish: Yeah, makes it invisible.
CC: —you're just guaranteed to get points. (Nom shoots 4c and the bell dings to indicate the Hunters won)
Nom: Little bastard!
CC: There we go.
Shauna: Oh my god.
Abolish: Nice.
Nom: (exhales) God I hate hunting in this map.
Shauna: You-(breaking up) continued around the map, and you-you stayed with 4c.
Nom: Hey, at least we-at least we both got two.
4c: Hey, at least I wasn't in the shadows. (4c laughs)
Abolish: (through laughter) What? (Rusty laughs) I-who-what?
CC: Has Rusty made another art project?
Abolish: Question mark, question mark. Question mark? (Abolish and Rusty laugh) [while this was happening Nom stopped attempting to hide, and moved to be next to 4c on a painting]
4c: So I know what's about to happen, and I'm a-I'm real upset by this. (Nom begins to laugh)
[Nom uses a red brush to sloppily write '4c' on his guy's torso]
4c: I know-I see you. You're not-you're not slick. (4c laughs, as Nom continues to giggle) [Nom uses a thicker brush to draw an arrow on the legs of his guy]
Nom: (through laughter) I don't know what you're talking about, man. (Nom laughs harder) I don't know what you're talking about.
4c: (quietly, under Nom) It's okay. I understand Nom. For the bit.
Shauna: Aw, aw.
CC: Do you, are you having, is he-is he snitching?
4c: Yeah... (Nom laughs)
Nom: (through laughter) No no no no. [Nom wipes his guy's body clean, and moves away from 4c]
Abolish: I'm ready. (the sound of a clock ticking happens every second)
CC: (imitating Sponge-Bob) I'm ready, I'm ready.
Nom: I'm cooked.
Shauna: So am I, the game just—completely changed the colors on me.
4c: (to Nom) Are you not still here? Did you back out?
Nom: Mm mm.
4c: Oh. (three seconds of the clock ticking)
Shauna: 4c got excited for a moment. (CC laughs)
Nom: I wasn't gonna rat you out.
CC: So you're safe—
Nom: I was just in it for the bit. (4c laughs)
CC: There's one bit that might be visible but that's about it.
4c: I see what you're talking about, that bit. (three seconds of silence)
Nom: Honestly, probably just leave-just leave it.
4c: I'm leaving it, I'm leaving it, to see how they do.
Rusty: Yeah.
4c: How did Rusty get that close, that's scary.
CC: Yeah—
Nom: Yeah, the fact that—like, that's the thing, that's how good 4c's spot is, is the fact that you can do this, [Abolish moves up the painting, barely missing 4c's body] and he's still not being seen. Like, it's ridiculous. (4c laughs in disbelief)
Shauna: Oh wow, he's like really flat—
Nom: Yeah, his spot is really really good.
(the sound of a whistle)
4c: Oh god, oh my god, oh my god—
4c: Oh god. Oh god. (4c giggles nervously)
Shauna: Let's go.
4c: (through laughter) Oh god.
Shauna: Uh oh. (the sound of a whistle)
Nom: Like if I take-if I turn nameplates off, he's just gone. (sound of a gun firing)
4c: (high pitched) Oh!
CC: Yeah, no, he-he's just straight up gone.
Nom: Like he, like even whenever I zoom all the way in on him, like it's. It's crazy. (four gunshots go off)
4c: (through laughter) Oh my god. Jesus Christ.
Nom: What a day.
CC: Yeah, he is in that, yeah, he's right there. (the bell dings, signifying the Hunters won) (Nom laughs) Hey heyyyy.
Abolish: Yep.
Shauna: Oh my god.
Nom: That's-that's insane.
Abolish: I had to like—look, and it was only the slight gray that—made my eyes—
4c: I wanna go see the other ones. I wanna fly around.
Shauna: Do not look at me. (Nom goes up close to 4c's now visible body, zooming in to view the differences before flying away)
Abolish: (overlapping) That was really good 4c.
CC: (overlapping) You can-you can just press left click and teleport 4c.
4c: Oh, ooh. Honestly Nom, for the-for the lack of time, that was actually (noise goes off and banner appears on bottom left that indicates that 4c gave Nom an 'eeyan' [thumbs up]) that wasn't bad.
Nom: Bro no my-mine was chopped, immediately, man, it was fucked. (Nom goes back up to 4c's painting and a clicking noise happens to indicate that Nom gave 4c an 'eeyan' [thumbs up])
Nuke: Wait Katie, I've just seen you—
Piepie: 4c!
Nuke: That's amazing, Katie.
Katie: Hi 4c! Thank you, thank you.
Piepie: Good morning!
Shauna: 4CVIT...
Wade: How, how, how, how have you found—
Nuke: How many people just joined the call?
Nom: (loudly) 4C!
Nuke: Hi 4c!
Abolish: Hello 4c.
Xander (?): 4c!
4c: Mine used to be a lot le-okay, I-okay wait, this is—it's gonna be bad.
CC: Do I know what spot you're doing, 4c? Is that the one you showed me? (CC laughs)
4c: Um—
Nom: And me.
4c: —dunno. No, I'm talking about...I don't wanna give away my spot.
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4c: We're back, we're here—
Branzy: —you got the.
4c: Let me turn on my music again, I turned it off, I was having a very dramatic opening. Explaining everything that's been going on.
Branzy: You dramatic boy. You absolutely—(4c begins spluttering) did.
4c: Why'd you say it like that, Branzy? (4c laughs)
Branzy: No, no, in a good way—in a great way. It's like the storytelling. It's like—
Branzy: Someone's gonna com-compile that with—when I said that me and him could kiss later—
4c: (through laughter, loudly) What?!
Branzy: —and it's gonna be totally out of context, and it's not gonna be—it's gonna end up on some TikTok, and-and I'm gonna be in the middle of the night, watching it, and I'm gonna pop up and be like, "oh my gosh."
4c: (quietly, disbelieving laughter in his voice) Wait, what?
Branzy: Misrepresented again! (4c laughs harder)
4c: I feel like I'm missing some chapters actually, Branzy. I. Wha-what happened? (two seconds of silence, then 4c coughs lightly)
Branzy: I also told Pangi we could kiss later. I-it's-it's-I'm not trying to—I'm just saying—it's more like. Out of like—they felt bad, you know, I wanted them to feel good. They were like, "no one wants to kiss me," and I was like, "aw, that's so sad." (four seconds of silence)
4c: Do I. Wait, how do I phrase this.
Branzy: Ph-don't phrase anything. Don't bring it up again, what if he comes over here and is expecting something? I'm a married man.
4c: (reading what he has typed but not sent in chat) "Branzy was saying he asked to kiss you later is this true?" (three seconds silence) Can I say that, Branzy? (four seconds of silence, then 4c giggles) The pause—! Lay off holding—I'm holding the message, Branzy. (sees what Branzy wrote in chat, starts laughing harder)
[Branzy in game chat: are we still on for our kiss later?]
Branzy: I'll do it. N-no one's gonna—
4c: No one's gonna speak for you?
Branzy: —no one's gonna offer my kisses but me. (4c begins coughing due to laughing so hard)
Branzy: (reading what Pangi put in chat) "Of course." (Branzy laughs) Oh that's so funny.
4c: (reading what he wrote in chat) "This is awesome." (4c coughs)
[Branzy in game chat: 4C wants in]
4c: (saying it as he writes it in chat) "No no no no." (Branzy snickers) "I'm okay actually."
[Woogiex in game chat: nonono 4c is all MINE]
[Branzy in game chat: deal, kisses for all] (4c giggles, Branzy joins, then five seconds of silence)
4c: I-I-I-I'm afraid to interact with this now, (Branzy starts laughing) I'm gonna be honest. (4c laughs)
[KatieGoBrr in game chat: FREEEEE MEEEEEEEEEEEEE]
Branzy: You brought this up, you did this.
4c: I-I should've—I, you know what, it is my fault, I did-(he laughs) I did, I did start this, and I, I've swiftly regretted it.
Branzy: You started the bit, 4c, now we have to see it through. (Branzy and 4c quietly laugh)
4c: I-I don't know if I wanna see this one through, Branzy.
Branzy: I didn't wanna see it through, either. You made it.
4c: T-to be fair, Branzy, I asked-I asked if it was okay first.
Branzy: That's fair, you did. And I-I-I took action.
4c: (through laughter) You know what, I respect you taking the action. (Branzy laughs)
some cute moments from the beginning of 4c's gridlock weekend two stream
4c: (while rapidly 'waving' to Nom, who is coming closer as he 'waves' back in game) We've only-we've only won, uh, three out of the four games, so we're gonna have to. Pick up the weight that we lost before? But I believe in us. We had competitive—com-like, competition, last time. So. (Nom and 4c continue to 'wave' at each other as Nom begins walking backwards, away from 4c) Um. (4c stops waving to open Discord while Nom continues to back away, jumping and waving) I don't know, is-is Nom ready? I'm gonna, I'm gonna undeafen. Just in case. I'll undeafen (4c begins jumping and waving again) so whenever he's ready. (amused) He's just kinda waving goodbye. Goodbye Nom, goodbye, I'll never see you ever again, goodbye. As he disappears into the void. Oh no. (4c laughs) He's just gone.
4c: (high pitched) Oh my gosh, BumpyJake, oh my goodness. (normal tone) Hi BumpyJake, oh my goodness, it's BumpyJake, one of the admins of Gridlock, oh my goodness.
[in chat: bumpyjake: 4C are you gonna win]
4c: (out loud and in chat) Yes. (4c laughs)
4c: No hesitation. Yes. (reading chat) "We're so privileged." (4c laughs)
[in chat: bumpyjake: bet]
[in chat: Nominalgravy: jake why didnt you ask me if im gonna win]
4c: Um. (reading chat) "4c are you-jake why didn't you ask me (through laughter) if I'm gonna win?"
4c: (out loud and in chat) This is true.
4c: Oh my gosh. (Reading chat) "My mom probably won't mind me staying up just this time." "When's it gonna start?" Uh, we're gonna start—
[in chat: bumpyjake: well its a given
[in chat: bumpyjake: if 4C wins
[in chat: bumpyjake: he will carry you to victory
4c: (reading in game chat) Uh, "well it's a given if 4c wins he will c-" (out loud and in chat) pfft.
4c: (through laughter) That's crazy. That's-that's—
Nom: You see this guy? You see this guy?
4c:—that's diabolical ragebait.
Nom: You see this guy?
[in chat: Nominalgravy: Mean and rude jake mean and rude]
4c: (high pitched, through laughter, reading chat) "If he-4c wins he'll carry you to victory," is di—I, you know what, I respect, (Nom giggles) I respect Jake ragebaiting you, that's-that's iconic, honestly. (4c laughs)
[in chat: bumpyjake: kiddingggg you both got this
SB: Well. Well well. Ladies and gentle—
4c: Well well well. (he hits at Katie)
SB: —season eight. of Lifesteal. Can you believe that it's the eighth season of Lifesteal? A-anyone been here for all-all eight seasons?
4c: [in chat, private message to Katie] he said the thing...
SB: So, as you look around, you might, you might see some friends. You might see some enemies. And. You might see your worst nightmares. (4c zooms in to Clown, zooms out and notices that Katie is staring directly at him) This-this server is not about fun.
4c: (muted) Pffft. I can't—!
SB: This server is about-is a challenge. This server is about resilience. And—
4c: When Katie looked at me when he said worst nightmare.
Nom: The funny thing...about us being a duo in this is like, I feel like. This is like-like two different sides of this are our two different gro-uh, like, uh, skill sets?
4c: Mhm.
Nom: Of like, we've always said whenever it comes to like, movement stuff—and I feel like it applies to this as well, like, movement stuff, if it's a mechanical? Kind of like course. Or like, race or something like that, you're gonna beat my ass in the like, mechanical thing? If it's to do with like, quick reacting, to like, things? I'll probably win that. Where like, we can—we get to use that to like, our advantage. So like, the thing there, with the spyglasses, you ju-you know where it is, you know where that pathing is, and then I took the stuff that's more like—okay I land, I loot, I-I like, try to do it proactively? Like, throwing shit together?
4c: Mhm.
Nom: Like, I'unno, I-I feel like that's the two things we're good at whenever it comes to this.
4c: I'm doing more like, bigger, confusing ones, I can like, lock in on those, typically? I dunno. It-but yeah, it's different, it's a different type of game, but it's the same kind of idea, of like, the choices of the reactive and the proactive ones.
Nom: Yeah.
4c: You were saying. Um. It is-it is very true.
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Gridlock - Don't Feed Him Chocolate; Kill a Parrot with a Cookie
In which Martyn doesn't know the parrot mechanics of vanilla Minecraft
Martyn: There's a parrot right there, hello chum. C'mere.
Portal: Aw. Poor little guy.
Martyn: 'bout to ruin your day, fella. Oh there's a few of them, actually. Good. (begins beating the parrot to death with a cookie)
Portal: That's horrible, I have a parrot in my branding.
Martyn: (the parrot dies, no achievement gained) In your branding?
Portal: Well. It's partly in my branding, it's like, my starting soon screen and stuff.
Martyn: Kay. Killing a parrot with a cookie didn't work.
Portal: Oh. Did you kill it or did you just feed it?
Martyn: No, I killed it. Oh wait, is it feed it? "Kill a parrot with a c–don't feed him chocolate." (Portal begins laughing) Oh, you feed it–
Portal: (through laughter) No no no no, please don't tell me you hit the parrot with a cookie in your hand.
Martyn: Yeah, cause it said, cause it said (Portal laughs harder) "Kill a parrot with a cookie." Is that–
Portal: (sounding further away from his mic) Ah, that's amazing.
Martyn: D-don't act like this is normal knowledge! This isn't regular knowledge!
Portal: (normal tone) That is amazing.
Martyn: That is not common knowledge that a vanilla parrot dies to eating a cookie. [Graecie: a quest objective has been unlocked!] I'm not taking that. (he finds another parrot, feeds it a cookie and it dies, giving them three points)
Portal: Technically he was right.
Martyn: Is that a plugin or is that actually vanilla?
Portal: (through laughter) That's a feature.
Martyn: That is mental.
Portal: That's so funny.
4c: I've only found like four slugs so far, I'll keep looking.
Katie: Six or seven.
Wade: Shut up.
Nom: Ugh.
4c: So. I just didn't say those numbers at all. (he laughs)
Wade: Alright, I'm gonna jump off, Nom. Oh, I'm dehydrating.
4c: Oh.
Katie: I'm also dehydrating, I can't find any slugs—
4c: I found another slug, yay! Oh, another one—
Nom: I found a slug—
Katie: I can't find any—
4c: I have six or seven now. (Katie inhales sharply)
Wade: (like he's trying not to laugh) Shut up.
Katie: (screaming) Yeeeeesssss!
Nom: Can I unsubscribe from friends?
Katie: Yeeeessss!
4c: Well, that's like a tv show, you can't unsubscribe from that one.
Katie: Pfffft. (high pitched) That was really good.
Nom: Also. That was. That was not really—
Katie: (overlapping) That was really good, that was really good. That was really good.
Nom: (overlapping) I-I feel like I could've seen that on Facebook attached to a meme photo—you know what, that makes sense that Katie would like that.
Katie: That was really good, that was really good. That was really good. That was good, that.
Nom: Katie, you're gonna make a great wine aunt one day. (Wade laughs, Nom joins)
Katie: Dude! You've been nothing but an asshole to me today, stop.
4c: I just found like, six, like, all in one big clump.
Katie: Hm?
4c: Maybe seven of them. (Katie giggles)
Katie: Very good.
Wade: (through laughter) Oh, I'm full, okay—
4c: I-I love how there were exactly six, but I just said that on purpose, 'cause I just. I heard Katie's voice, like, the change—
Katie: Yayyyyyy. Yayyyyyyy.
4c: I'm sorry Nom.
Wade: Okay. Alright, I'm gonna come back—
Nom: You're not forgiven. (Nom laughs)
Wade: —and get this water and then go to the-we'll go to Noah.
4c: (through laughter, quietly echoing) "You're not forgiven."
Wade: (reading chat) "I hate it here." I love-I love seeing the shared chat and seeing everyone's like, disdain as well.
Nom: I love—
4c: I have so many water slugs.
Nom: Oh my god, I don't know what just happened but my framerate just plummeted—
Wade: Yeah, I-I just filled up with water.
Nom: Same.
4c: Oh, I thought I had more than I did, I only have six. (Katie inhales excitedly)
Wade: Don't. (4c laughs) You don't have to. You don't have to! (Katie giggles excitedly, anticipating what's about to come)
Nom: I don't know how, but I just, I just checked how many I have, and I'm not vocalizing it.
4c: Do you-do you have seven?
Nom: (immediately) Shut the fuck up 4c.
Wade: You don't have to, you don't—
Katie: (screaming) Yes, yes! Yes! (4c laughs, sounding like a tea kettle) Yes! Yes! (breathing heavily in excitement)
Wade: (through laughter) Oh my god.
4c: Oh...(he laughs)
Nom: I kicked KatieGoBrr from the game (he laughs).
Wade: (calming down from laughter) Oh...
4c: Jesus Christ...
Nom: I feel vindicated, me personally.
4c: Oh my god...
Wade: What are you two [Nom and 4c] doing, you're like kissing with your ships.
Nom: That's flipping awesome. (he does a flip with the tadpole, starts cackling)
Wade: No, stoppit! (4c also does a flip with the tadpole)
Katie: 4c!
4c: It-it weirdly doesn't make me sick at all, which is like.
Nom: Yeah, it's sick.
4c: (overlapping, quietly) Goodbye!
Nom: Good luck in Lifesteal, please don't get insta-farmed.
4c: Thank you.
Nom: (through laughter) Let's go.
4c: Don't worry, I'll kill KatieGoBrr for you, um.
Nom: Thank you very much. (4c laughs) Thank you very much.
4c: Alright—
Nom: You already knew what I was going to ask, you already knew. (4c laughs) That's why he's my duo. (Nom laughs) Take care 4c, have a good one, goat.
4c: Goodbye Nom, byeeee.
Nom: Byeeeee—
Wade: I'm gonna call Katie on, uh, the alt account.
Nom: Yuh.
Wade: Can you guys entertain—can I keep you guys live on chat while I try to fix Katie's-Katie's PC?
Nom: (immediately) Nah.
4c: (beat) Yeah, we can do that.
Nom: Oh, yeah we can do that.
Wade: Great, thanks guys. (Nom starts laughing)
4c: The immediate 'nah.'
Wade: Alright, bye. You've got this!
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Nom being a menace and only listening to 4c, a short story
Wade: Hi.
Katie: Hi.
Wade: Look who's not here yet, 4c.
4c: Oh...
Katie: I'm actually enraged, I don't even think you understand. I feel rage right now.
4c: How is Nom the one not here?
Wade: (overlapping) Nom was going like, "I'm going to go—"
Katie: (high pitched, clearly pissed) That's what I'm saying!
Wade: "—I'm gonna go outside and touch a tree." And then—(Nom joins the call)
4c: (joyfully) Nom!
Wade: Well, look who it is.
Katie: I don't even wanna play with him anymore—
Nom: Oh, hey guys.
Katie: I actually don't wanna play with you anymore.
Nom: What's up? (4c 'hehe's)
Wade: Go live, you're still—
4c: (quietly, still happy) Nommmmmmm!
Wade: —not live yet!
Katie: Dude, Nom—!
Nom: What's-what? (Wade laughs) What do you want?
Katie: I rushed my dinner for this and you still haven't started your stream!
Nom: Ohhhhhhhh, I get it. 4c, should I go live?
Katie: (immediately) I left. I left, I'm not doing that. I'm actually not doing all that. I actually, I don't even care. I don't even care. Hang on.
Nom: —4c, should I go live?
4c: Uhhhh (he starts snickering) The way Katie left the call immediately.
Nom: (laughs) I dunno, just, just like, should I go live, what do you think?
4c: I dunno...
Wade: 4c, 4c please, c'mon.
4c: I would, I would say so, probably, yeah.
Nom: Oh, okay. Jeez, Wade, you just had to ask, man. (4c 'hehe's, Nom leaves the call to start stream)
Wade: (crashing out) I asked so many times, 4c! I asked so many times. (4c giggles)
4c: While, while Nom's setting stuff up, I might be right back for two seconds, to like, continue talking about something?
Wade: Yeah, sure, that's okay.
4c: Ping me, ping me when everyone's back, if that's okay, Wade.
Nom: Well, well, well.
Wade: (overlapping) There he is!
Nom: Hey guys.
Wade: Hi.
Nom: (cheerfully) Hello!
Katie: (quietly) Hi Nom.
Nom: Jeez, you guys took forever.
Wade: Shut up! (through laughter) Shut up. (Nom takes an obnoxious drink of his coffee)
Katie: (quietly) Don't start, actually, don't start. Do not start. (Nom starts laughing) It is too warm for this bullshit.
Nom: Oh, 4c's not here, okay. (Nom leaves the call)
Wade: No, no, no he—(Wade makes a keyboard smash with his mouth, sounding like he's put a hand over his mouth in agony as he laughs in agony)
Katie: Can we just play without him?
Wade: Someone in my chat just went, "what tea are you having today?" And I now feel embarrassed to tell them it's not tea, it's Dr. Pepper in a cup.
4c: We're ready?
Wade: Well.
Katie: (sounding tired) Dude, Nom. (she sighs)
Wade: (sighs) We were. And then Nom went, "4c's not here, oh, okay," and then left.
4c: Oh.
Katie: Mhm, mhm.
4c: Oh.
Katie: Mhm, mhm, mhm.
Wade: (laughing) Katie...he's a weapon. He's a weapon today, 4c.
Katie: I could've—
Katie: Oh, look who it is.
Wade: There—hey.
4c: Hiiii. Hi Nom.
Nom: Fellas!
4c: Hello!
Nom: Hello—well, well, well.
4c: (echoing) Well, well, well.
Nom: How are we all, how are we all feeling? We ready to-to fish? Are we ready for fish game?
4c: I'm so excited to fish.
Wade: Yes, I'm ready for fishing.
Nom: Yeah!
There’s an episode of Sesame Street (on Netflix! you can watch it easily!) where Elmo attends a toy-swap, where you offer up old toys you don’t play with anymore and receive someone else’s toys that are new to you. Cute!
But Elmo, after cheerfully surrendering his old toys, sees that the children who swapped toys with him are playing with his toys “wrong”! They’re imagining entirely different make believe scenarios! They’re pretending the football is a dinosaur egg instead of a rocket ship! Aaahhhhh!!!! And this is so distressing to poor Elmo that he does the unthinkable: He does swapsies-backsies and takes all his toys back!
This being Sesame Street, he learns that you can’t control how other people play pretend, but you can join in if you want to! And if you don’t want to, that’s ok, you can just play pretend your own way by yourself or with someone else who wants to play that way too. You can still be friends with people who play pretend differently than you (and aren’t being mean/harmful/etc, do not bad-faith-read this 🤨).
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