OnceUponAVoid

I was born in the exact right generation I love being an unmarried woman in my twenties with my own bank account and no children

Y'know how they say a child writes the best poetry before they learn what poetry is "supposed" to look like? I think a visual artist makes the best visual art before they learn how well it would sell if they made an enamel pin of a possum saying "be gay do crimes"

That's kind of a dated one, what are people doing now? If I wanted to be cutting. Breeding season salmon in a BDSM harness saying "TO BE CRINGE IS TO BE FREE"

I'll admit, I was living in fear of this. But now that it's happened I feel strangely calm

*goes to Coachella in a white linen suit like an antebellum lawyer, sweating profusely and dabbing at my forehead with a handkerchief* now, I’m no fancy scientist, but would you folk know where a simple gentleman such as myself could obtain some acid? Now, I’m no big city lawyer, but could any of you fine youths point a country boy such as myself in the direction of some fucking acid?

it's healthy for academics to have professional feuds. enrichment activity

when you drink all the wine in the house and then you have. :( no wine in the house

me when i excuse myself during a dinner party to sneak outside and milk more cabernet sauvignon from the Creature

had food poisoning when i posted this

Well if you'd pasteurized the Cabernet Sauvignon you milked from the creature maybe you wouldn't have gotten food poisoning from it.

oh suddenly everyone's an expert on the Creature i milk

Given that patent attorneys, especially back then used to have hard science degree, it makes the one about how they know the weight limit on a bridge funnier.

The unsavvy talk about furries like they're some hypersexual excretion of modernity, but drawing animal-people is one of the top 10 neolithic human activities. It's up there with collecting berries and producing clay figures of fat women.

THIS ONE FUCKING WORKS. REBLOG IT.

this for real fucking works

Happy 15th birthday to None Pizza with Left Beef!

Sweet Sixteen

deep sea creature