On the Mend

eyes hit serious diminishing returns wrt resource costs vs vision quality as they get bigger, so the question became: what the FUCK do giant (and colossal) squid need to see so badly that they couldn't see with swordfish-sized eyes that's justifying that massive energy cost? that nothing else in the deep ocean needs to see so fucking badly??

turns out the one strength eyes that big really have over much smaller eyes is: seeing large glowing objects in water deeper than 500 meters from an appreciable distance.

sperm whales are the primary predator of giant squid. sperm whales don't glow. BUT! water that deep is full of bioluminescent creatures-- these creatures light up when bumped into. something a sperm whale's size is continuously bumping into those critters, it's just surrounded by a glowing field all the time when it's swimming at those depths, visible from a distance-- if you have the right eyes-- as a massive glowing shape. so basically the only reason to have eyes the size of soccer balls is if you live in the deep ocean and your life depends on having a heads up when a hungry sperm whale lurking around

Still in pursuit, we followed the ball toward a small lake in Motor World that had been earmarked for a fleet of tiny bumper boats for children. The area wasn’t open yet, but the empty boats were being tested and floated on the surface. The ball soared over the grass and smashed into several of them, scattering the others with rippling waves from the impact, which launched some of the boats several feet in the air.

Charlie and Ken waded into the water looking for the hatch. After some difficulty, they got it open. Charlie pulled Frank out by grabbing him under his armpits like a baby. Frank crawled up the bank, coughing and sputtering. He splayed across the grass as we all stared at the ball, which bobbed in the water like it was attached to a fishing lure.

We did not ask for the inspector’s report, nor did we ever hear of one being filed. Ken Bailey returned to Canada. The snow-makers cleared away the PVC. Told to dispose of the Bailey Ball, they rolled it into the woods, where it remained for many years."

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN EARN THE LOVE OF MY CITIZENS!

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN ADEQUATELY PREPARE MY SUCCESSOR!

EMPEROR OF HAN: I say, these false maidens who attendeth My every act fill me with a deep dread. And I, a man with many conc'bines, speak thusly!

[Enter QIN SHI and BAT, the servant]

QIN SHI: Thou ungrateful cut-sleeve! I shall court these maidens!

SKYLINE: Marqius, he doth speak truth. Thou art a homosexual As the good Lord Qin Shi surely implies.

EMPEROR OF HAN: Fie! I am your emperor, ungrateful knave!

QIN SHI: The good Marquis doth desire of the very gods That he might have a fraction of mine imperial glory!

EMPEROR OF HAN: Glory? A grand jest! Thou sayest this, But I am one of the noblest emperors in China While thou hast need to put "shut up about the mercury" In thine bio! Speak not to me about glory!

QIN SHI: Fie! Thou knave! I am possessed by no man! I say, I am possessed by no man! I, the glorious emperor, can earn the love of my citizens Adequately prepare my successor Establish a stable dynasty!

i would like to add some information for the peasants; my FULL TITLE is qin shi huangdi, which in your barbaric tongue translates to “the first emperor of qin.”

Shi means first

Huang and Di means emperor

Ying Zheng is the name, where Ying is the surname