maybe you and i are both damned

has anyone noticed recently that it's expensive

times like these really make you appreciate pouring river water in your socks

my luminous mama

every day i am thankful to ancient humans for the domestication of the cat. fucking genius idea. agriculture was a good one too btw but you really outdid yourselves with the cat thing

Risencrantz and Grindenstern

at my wedding yes i will have a maid of honour but why stop there. ill give all my maids titles. we will have a maid of hope. a maid of horror. a maid of horticulture. a maid of harm. a maid of healing. and of course. a maid of hogs

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

i feel like i’m cursed forever but other than that i’m doing alright