head of the bus seat fan club

hello. you can get this on inprnt if you want it

as above (gave myself a monk tonsure) so below (also tonsured my pussy)

I can't help but feel a whisper of culture shock any time I talk about how fucked up and fundamentally unequal the textual dynamic between two fictional characters is and folks outside my usual circles react as though I'm arguing against making it yuri.

sometimes i see an out of context discourse post and im like "hm this really sounds like op is strawmanning a reasonable argument and making up a guy to be mad at." and then i check their blog for context and realise theyve spent the past 72 hours arguing with the human embodiments of the strawman. like damn nevermind im sorry for doubting you. you are fighting battles so cartoonishly evil i cant even fathom them as real. good luck out there.

the thing about that weird stuff americans call cheese is that if you heat it a little it becomes an excellent burger condiment despite its failings in every other area. such is the fate of the american cultural product

the American 'cheese' slice was engineered by our best scientific minds (all borrowed from Germany ofc) to melt perfectly onto a burger and for nothing else. Its only purpose is to compliment the one true product of the American people. The hamburger. (also borrowed from Germany)

reeling a little at the implication that the Kraft Single was a product of operation paperclip

anyway the thing about Ratthi and Gurathin is that I could get behind them as a Thing but literally the only version that works for me is Gurathin being So Fucking Mad that he could bite through METAL because it's sooooo stupid that he did the Most Basic Thing imaginable and got a stupid lil crush on the Hot Nice Guy from work that everybody wants to fuck. oooooh wow Gurathin that guy is hot and nice and now you want to touch his junk about it??? groundbreaking. inspiring. idiot. obviously he'll be taking this to his grave. and meanwhile Ratthi's acting like the girl from a horse girl movie. going pspsps with lil sugar cubes. trying to lure Gurathin to his polycule board game night.

Ratthi isn't even doing it with Intent he just thinks Gurathin needs more enrichment but every time he's like oh hey wanna get a smoothie after work :) no pressure :) only if you're up for that haha :) Gurathin's going oh fuuuuuck he's trying to seduce me 🤬

Murderbot isn't adding anything incorrect for the record it's just stressing Gurathin out with extra info. sliding in with shit like "you forgot to note that Variables Three and Seven have recently become romantic partners" and Gurathin's like "bullshit, they're both dating Variable Four but they're not involved with each other" and Murderbot goes "incorrect. they went on their first date this weekend. Ratthi is very excited for them and told me about it this morning. it was agony." and then Gurathin throws up