You EMPLOYE Miette? You make Miette pay rent? Jail. Jail for father ten thousand years

You've heard of the man, the myth, the legend. Now get ready for the woman, the omen, the portent.

Jolene

WHERE is that poem about that person learning all about their partners hyperfixation before getting dumped the last line is like "love is a stack of books on my nightstand with a bookmark near the end" I need it to feel whole help me please

how am I supposed to stay sane after reading this smh

When I was a little boy, girls used to just do random cartwheels for no reason. Then one day, they stopped. Now that I am a man, no women randomly do cartwheels. This is because society is evil and killed the cartwheel impulse in their soul. They don't even spin horizontally anymore. It's fucked up.

Text: congrats on the failure babe, most people don't even try

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remember that guy that had a single auditory hallucination that told him he had a brain tumor and the exact location and then he went to the doctor and it was fucking right

just ask that person out, the worst thing they can say is an esoteric incantation that topologically inverts your body

Youre a mollusk and something potentially bad or scary gets inside you what do you do. Make a pearl around it. Okay. okay