These Are The Days Of Miracles And Wonders

thank you god for revealing yourself through blood and bones and thorns and snakes and spit and tongues of fire and rushing wind and a broken body and the guts of lambs 

I don't remember finding fart jokes particularly funny even when I was a child.

Five year old me, watching a movie with fart jokes: "Oh, how gauche. They're pandering to the lowest common denominator."

When I'm dreaming, but about to wake up, there's the chance that I'll remember somethihg I said in my dream. This morning, I was blessed with the phrase: "August Tenth... the Pumpkin Rapture."

our age of lettuce is collapsing

my friend just told me, “honestly, right now I don’t think you need a reminder that it’s all for God’s glory; I think you need a reminder that Jesus wept.”

it’s quick, it’s easy and it’s free:  pouring river water in your socks

why would i do that lmao

it’s quick, it’s easy and it’s free

relationships are all about love! except love/hate relationships, which are 48% about love and 48% hate.

What about the other 4% in this love/hate relationship? What is that about?

taco bell crunchwrap supreme

I step out of the bathroom after brushing my teeth last night and the first thing I see is my husband, in a chair, cradling the succulent his cousin-in-law sent us as a thank-you gift, with the most funereal expression on his face I think I've ever seen.

Despite a weird mix of overwatering AND underwatering, the succulent has lived to see another day. I've been wanting to name it, but the husband doesn't want to name it until we know it's going to survive, like it's a sickly infant from the olden days

thinking I look chic when in reality I'm kind of giving "movie character who needs to be dressed in such a way so the audience knows they remember 'Nam"

chic as in "looks really enthusiastic about Creedence Clearwater Revival"