no chill to be had

did u guys see the deer with the ribbon

did u see this

are you gonna pick those penne noodles out of the boiling water one by one like a man, or are you gonna use a strainer like some kind of democrat?

also unnecessary!!!! punctuation marks??????? like…… ??? what is going on here????? i!! am!!! so!!! excited!!!!

and™ totally™ unneeded™ trademark symbols™

personally I enjoy Random Capitalisation to show things are Very Important

can we also talk about starting a sentence and then kind of just 

stating something reblog if you agree

dude this isn’t even a collection of memes, this is a demonstration of internet grammar… anyone who says that when you type and communicate on the internet you lose too much inflection to get the real meaning just doesn’t understand internet syntax. the evolution of language in action.

the Rosetta Stone of the twenty first century

Also :) doing :) this :) to express :) bottled :) pain :)

or,,,,,using commas,,,,,, for elipsis’ ,,,, bc,,, it sounds better,,, in your head,,,, than periods,,,,,,,

pu t ting sp a ces in your wor ds at r and om time s because w hat the fu ck

Is it just me, or did anyone else read all of these with different tones of voice, volume, and inflection?

Don’t forget the B I G S P A C E S F O R E M P H A S I S

Remember the sarcasm font? Yeah, still doing that.

*takes an ant outside and lets it free instead of killing it* This one is for you Paul Rudd.

*takes a spider outside* this is for you Tom Holland

*takes a mantis outside* This is for you Pom Klementieff

*feeds some birds* this is for you Anthony Mackie

*waters some trees* This is for you Groot

*pets cat* this if for you Chadwick

*pets roomba* this is for you dum-e

*overthrows America’s burgeoning fascist regime* this is for you Steve

kids have no concept of anything. i walked into my kindergarten class and one kid asked me what my name was. when i said miss jones, he said “i like that name. did you know i’m in love with you”

i asked my four year old cousin how old he thought i was going to be at my next birthday and he said 8. im 23

once i told a 6 year old that i had finished school and was doing “more school” [university] and she asked “why haven’t you found anyone to marry then”

We were at a museum and I was asking for the student discount and my nine year old cousin looks up at me with his eyes wide and says “wait you’re a STUDENT??”

I used to babysit these three kids and the eldest who was around 11 at the time was talking about how adults are boring and when I told him I was an adult he said, “That’s not true, you’re my age”

our aunt teaches and she has this story about a little girl who really was always pretty quiet in class and then on the final day of kindergarten she just up and stated ‘i’m all teached now. i don’t need to be teached anymore. i’m done of being teached.’

once when i was 19, I told my little cousin that i was 19 and she looked up at me with huge eyes and went, “Does that mean you don’t have to bring an adult with you to the pool?”

My 6 year old cousin saw me driving for the first time, looked up at him mom and said “does that mean she is married now?”

I watched my dad and my niece (3 at the time) arguing over a pair of pants and whether or not they were also a dress. My neice’s argument was that they were, in fact, also a dress because they were blue.

I asked the kids in my daycare class what they thought I should be for Halloween and this little boy goes, “ooh I know! A pickle! You’d be such a good pickle”

One time I was working with a kid and he looked up at me and asked “Do you have a boy?” I had no idea what he was talking about, but I told him that I did not have any boys. He looked shocked and then deeply concerned and said “Well, you better hurry up and shave your arms so you can get married; August is next month!”

When my cousin was a kid (somewhere between 3 and 7 I guess) she tried to say something about cookies or smth to her great grandmother. The great grandma in question didn’t hear her. “You need to speak louder, she can’t hear you,” my aunt said. “Why?” My cousin asked. “Because she’s very old.” My cousin nodded, walked straight up to our great grandmother and shouted “WHY AREN’T YOU DEAD?” … yeah luckily great grandmother’s hearing was indeed very bad and she didn’t really catch the question

A girl I was babysitting was trying to talk me in circles so I couldn't make her go to bed and she goes "are you married?" And I said "no." And she says "then why do you have boobs?" and no babysitting class prepares you for that shit

THIS IS THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN.

oh that’s fine i wasn’t using my heart anyhow

Okay Carrie Fisher officially wins the holder of the biggest Dick Energy, because the woman is so extra she found a way to squeeze her way into Episode 9 even from beyond the grave.

I can’t believe people actually use the term pop for soda like what is this footloose?

if yondu were still alive then that battle in wakanda would’ve ended in five minutes tops while no diggity played in the background

There is no unskilled labor, only undervalued skills.

Straight men who embrace their femininity, express emotions in a healthy way and help advocate for minority groups without speaking over them? Big dick energy.

don’t say “but sexuality is fluid” when a girl tells you she has no interest in men

I know I reblogged this mere hours ago, but it’s so good I wanna do it again.