Lumen Musicorum

In which the Dancer reflects on her life, and finds out that all her struggles have made her different... Unique. That they have made her strong - stronger than anyone left untested by such fire... And that she treasures her experiences, painful as they were, above all else. They make her... Her.

In which the Dancer at the Rooftop finally reconnects with music. With the shadow of love lost behind her, the dance floors she no longer felt now boom with brand-new life.

Break it down! For I only feel the music ||: And the assault of its pulsations Leaves me breathless in the dark Dancing, selfless in the crowd That tears the dance floor all around me So alive… Restless once again I will wander through the alleys This idle life through daylight hours leaves me a creature of the night And those white sounds of naked bulbs in my apartment Are screaming echoes that I never learnt to stand So here we are A myriad hours from the sunrise Here we are - we're freezing but that means we're still alive Yes here we are... Uniquely beautified by scars Beneath the rain, just outside the halo I'm snared in place a single step from finding respite there inside A single breath away - and giving in would fix my life! I'm just outside this nightclub's window, craving sound...

In which the Girl says thank you to the Boy - now a man by every right - and corresponds his love once last. The Boy, to this bright day, still says it isn't over - that it'll never be quite over, even if there's never a part two. The two of them keep tabs on one another, but know that life has now moved on. They watch each other grow, like they always have since they were kids... And like they always will. Forevermore.

You are the sunbathed pictures... My primordial dream The steps that walked beside me The breeze that brought me here A quiet, constant longing sings forever in my genes The "yes" we left unclear The scar that never heals

You are the reason that was left behind Yet I'm still here and I have thrived- the wayward girl a woman now I changed my soul, my body and mind just to give you a waking smile- and now I can't... Still I'll spread the Light you sparked!

...So thank you for believing And thank you for the ride I know that you're in me now I'm yours and you are mine Forever, love, forever Forever... You and I -S

In which the Dancer, now a loveless beggar roaming nowhere, makes a stand. She turns to the Boy, who had become an adamant stranger giving her small alms of love, and asks if this is all that's left. She dares him to say that they are truly over.

So this is it? What we’ve become, then? Is this in truth all that remains? Of me a loveless beggar roaming nowhere- without a purpose but still searching through the rain And you a faceless stranger... Giving only when you feel compelled The insipid phantom of a sentiment?

Let tortured heavens bleed And tell our tragic myth In shallow pools reflecting Our two lone figures in the mist

We carry on still craving Through all these grudged thoughts, all our buried faults- screaming, in unison Still we waste away pretending- that our story met its ending- and just star in mismatched tales! The scripts to perfect moments are now burning Lover, relish in their flame! I DEFY THE CHANCE TONIGHT! As even if in only a second- There is something in your eyes! Infuriated and wild That longs for all we used to have So face me and tell me that I lie I dare you, tell me that it's over -S

In which the Dancer breaks down, having lost her mind entirely to a single heartfelt song. Yes, it was she that ended their relationship, unable to handle the distance anymore... But now she reverts to the child the Boy once met, and crying as such, she begs the Boy to help her go back to the country she found love, so they can once more be together.

In which the Dancer realizes that she's the one hurting herself by holding on to the memory of her love. She thinks that only by his side the voices in her head stop screaming of self-hate and memories she longs to forget, so she holds on, even to the detriment of her sanity.

In which the Dancer realizes the feelings she holds towards the Boy bind her to sorrow... And that sorrow, somehow, has begun to be a part of her that she isn't willing to let go - consciously or subconsciously.

In which the Dancer realizes that no matter where the highway takes her, she can never truly escape the phantom of the Boy... For their love was so intense, and so insane, that it was better than anything reality can offer... How do you cope with a mundane reality after a love taught you that magic can exist?

In which the Dancer, undone by grief and mourning the deportation that separated her from her love - forcing them into a tragic long-distance affair - decides to break up with the Boy, and chase the light of dreams elsewhere. Her home will always be his arms, and yet...

In which the Dancer falls into a terrible depression, realizing that the best of all her years are being wasted on the windowsill, sighing and longing for things that aren't here nor now - the past, the wasted present, and a dreamless future... Start weaving for her a slipknot. Recall and discover in sobering sleuth That none may return to the golden of youth When all was desire, a search for the truth An innocent error, the time you misused

In which the Dancer attempts to rejoin life, but realizes that she no longer feels it... So she forces herself into the dance floors she once loved, and she wanders a city that she once found full of life... Only to find herself an outsider to everything.

Break it down! For I just can't feel the music ||: And the assault of its pulsations Leaves me reeling in the dark Craving, breathless in the crowd That tears the dance floor all around me So alive…

And I long to understand the life around me And I long to lose myself, sway so freely and feel the Light Yet here I am - another bar, another mimic Here I am again - forever changed by all these scars

So I roam throughout the night And the people past the windows Come together, laugh and dine As I'm drowning in these sighs Just outside their window's halo Craving that...

So break it down! I just can't feel the music... :||

In which the Dancer mourns the loss of her relationship, and how, even if they're nominally "together", the distance is turning her and her Boy... Bitter. She can see the inevitable tragedy in the horizon, so it might as well be already over.

Collecting the pieces of old, broken frames Of paintings of lovers that danced in the rain A lone painter waits for the end of all days For now she has nothing - to capture in paint

In more than a myriad of ways To be, not to last, was always our fate No crossroads ahead Miasma, despair A painting of longing, of days lost to grey

So I must let go of your hand Of phantoms that stand by my side And face this one hardest of facts: To be not to last; to be, not to last…

Burn the scripts written! Burn all that remains! For I gave my all and the ending still came! In forms so abstract... In the slightest of ways The painting grew darker One shade every day

-S

In which the Dancer admits she has to move on, without the Boy she thought she'd share her life with always... But she can also see that the echoes of their love will live within her. Always. A faint but everlasting smile The brightest flame has left these ashes A hope that you’ll return at last A life to forge again regardless

Handprints left upon this body Scents remaining in my mind! All those years of dreaming... Longing Gone like footprints on the sand

A mute but everlasting cry! Still you’re the one my dreams inhabits And will I make it through this night? The dark seems endless... I grow tired

Facing down this storm that we once challenged Standing now alone, but I will not give up This life refused to be what we desired But I will, somehow, carry on

-S

In which the Dancer feels herself slipping into a deep depression after being deported and torn from the Boy. She knows, still, that he’s got her back - even through the distance.

I won’t let my picture fall into the shadow But as a dreamer, I’m awake A mind aware discovers hell And through this narrow sight Of eyes now open, jaded, damned I see no beauty and no Light It sears the eyelids - peace denied

I let it in, a tempest in my haven And now its thoughts and all its hatred Are changing me inside A constant scream is silenced This envying mind is drowned For all around me life is present A burning hunger... Steals the night 

Dreamer of my dreams Sweet apple of my sin I beg of you - remind me Of all the smiles you say I bring Lead me into the Light Lie to me again And tell me that I’m not just made of scars Your words may root within 

I won’t let my picture fall into the shadow! And with your touch I finally wake Without this judgement of the self Beyond this clouded mind And this warped sense of who I am I see my truth is in your eyes Courageous, resolute... Alive 

…And I know you’ll be here shortly I know you are supporting me 

-S