Mia Makes Mods

we are kind of in "fetish world where everyone does my fetish" but the fetish is heteromonogamy

I can't believe we live in a world where there's an AI company unironically called "Palantir," and it isn't a parody. It's a real thing. I remember seeing a picture of an advertisement on here and thinking, "This HAS to be a joke. This is too on-the-nose to be real. They wouldn't honestly name an AI company Palantir, after the Seeing Stones from Lord of the Rings that are supposed to offer knowledge, but famously also might be feeding you misinformation from evil sources because 'we do not know who else may be watching.'" But then here I am listening to the BBC News discussing why the CEO of Palantir just published a Manifesto that sounds like it was written by a supervillain.

momma didn't raise no pervert i got that on my journey of self discovery

maidens if you are going to flee dramatically from my castle in the middle of the night once i reveal my true nature to you please leave your candelabra on the little ledge by the portcullis we are running out of them

starting to think these maidens are stumbling in soaked through from the rain just to steal my beautiful gowns and homewear are any of you actually lost

At the checkout in Home Goods loading the belt with nothing but candelabras in all shapes & sizes while the cashier watches sympathetically and asks if it’s the maidens again

artists fuck better because we turn sex into art, masterpieces, mattresses become canvases where we can paint our love to someone with bodies.

its like, impossible to come up with anything funnier than the experience of seeing this post

pharoahs fuck better because they ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh put the pussy in a scarmophogoghs

the most dangerous thing in the world is a man with nothing left to lose. [thinking] or maybe something to lose. maybe a lot of things to lose? [furrowing brow] or a spider. a really big spider with... poison teeth. [exceedingly pleased with myself] the most dangerous thing in the world is a big ass spider with poisonous fangs

or maybe a nuclear bomb.

[nodding sagely] or a tiger

what about a venomous tigert

😨

agnostic deltarune player: no one knows why the power menu says that

nobody knows why authors use symbolism and implication in their stories it's literally never been studied

40 years ago the idea of having monsters in your pocket seemed preposterous

estrogen and progesterone are nice but they need to hurry up and come up with a third thing that makes your tits grow even bigger even faster

estrogen and progesterone are nice but they need to hurry up and come up with a third thing that makes your tits grow even bigger even faster

estrogen and progesterone are nice but they need to hurry up and come up with a third thing that makes your tits grow even bigger even faster

if you have to rely on specific scripts or turns of phrase to socialise that's totally fine, but you must NOT reveal them to your friends while slightly drunk. it's like showing how the magic trick works, you can't do it in front of them afterwards

i like dogs a lot but i can never remember the differences between breeds (apart from the few types i've actually owned/interacted with). but i know people looove their dogs and love talking about their dogs, so whenever im talking to a dog owner i'll ask what breed it is, and no matter what breed they say i'll say "oh! i've heard they have a really nice nature :D" and they always go YESSS THEY'RE GREAT and start gushing about their dog and we have a nice conversation and i build social credit with this person. anyway i told my friends about this script a few weeks ago when slightly drunk and now every time we're in public together and a dog goes past they turn to me and ask "does that one have a nice nature?" im in a hell of my own making