All Aboard the Ship

why did- why did he throw the other 19 away?

those are the kinds of sharp fiscal instincts you need to be a successful entrepreneur

my mom just had a 7cm brain tumor removed and since she's woken up she's been talking nonstop about this dream she had about going to an art gallery full of colourful paintings by a 'homosexual artist' named klimsdorf who was ethereal and wise, both young and old... at first she was convinced he was a real person but after failing to find him online she's accepted he was a figment of her subconscious mind and is now determined to bring him to life via painting his portrait herself. she's 67 and has never drawn in her life. and now this. blorbo from her tumor

people born in 2000 should be like 12-14 now. but they’re not. that’s how fucked up our world is now

The older this post gets the funnier it becomes

My cousin born in 2000 is a licensed psychologist.

that’s how fucked up our world is now

“‘Your trauma made you stronger.’ No, my trauma made me traumatized. It made me weak, gave me sleepless nights and memory loss. It gave me feelings I never wanted. I made myself stronger by dragging myself out of a dark place and dealing with consequences that weren’t my fault.” - RK @rkkaaayou

did you know if you have a thrush(a yeast infection in your mouth) you have to take five anti-fungal pills a day for two fucking weeks to get rid of it??? because I do. and I wish I didn't.

just realized this is the most "you can tell the userbase of this website is aging" ass meme I have ever made

hopital

That feeling when your body is requesting something but you're not sure what so you just start eating and drinking random stuff to try and figure it out

Me, eating a chocolate waffle at 7pm: Is this what you desire, oh prison of flesh?

cannot watch the return of the king without thinking of that bad bootleg with the fucked up subtitles that said “this will be the end of Gender as we know it” instead of “this will be the end of Gondor as we know it”

official boob post

cats are really good at looking at things. very useful

having two cats essentially means you have a bug and rodent triangulation system. if they are both looking at something you know for damn sure there is some unauthorised fucking thing there.

sometimes it's a ghost tho