The Random Ravings of a Teenage Girl

Because this has always been done in Denmark.

During a recent televised debate, Rep. Jasmine Crockett took Mike Huckabee down over his interpretation of Christian morality.

Jasmine Crockett:

“Governor Huckabee, what does Jesus say in Matthew 25 about how we’ll be judged?”

Mike Huckabee:

He hesitated, mumbling something about sheep and goats.

Crockett: “That’s right. The final judgment. Would you like me to quote it?”

Before Huckabee could respond, she read directly from her phone:

“I was hungry and you gave me food.

I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink.

I was a stranger and you welcomed me.

I was sick and you looked after me.

I was in prison and you came to visit me.”

Crockett continued:

“Jesus doesn’t mention abortion.

He doesn’t mention same-sex marriage.

He doesn’t bring up tax rates or culture war issues.

The only criteria Jesus gives for heaven or hell are how we treat the poor, the sick, the immigrant, the prisoner.”

She looked Huckabee in the eye:

“So, Governor, if you oppose every single one of those policies, what does that say about your understanding of Christian morality?”

Huckabee tried to respond, but Crockett pressed on:

Matthew 19:21 – “Sell all your possessions and give to the poor.”

Luke 4:18 – “Proclaim good news to the poor, freedom for the prisoners.”

Matthew 8 – Jesus heals a man with leprosy, touching someone society called unclean.

“You say I’m not a real Christian because I support feeding programs for kids, universal health care, and immigration reform. But Jesus said those are the exact things that determine salvation.”

Then came the knockout:

“Jesus never said, ‘I was a wealthy corporation and you gave me tax breaks.’

He never said, ‘I was a gun manufacturer and you protected my profits.’

He never said, ‘I was a pharmaceutical company and you let me charge whatever I wanted.’”

Crockett concluded: “Your version of faith asks whether someone deserves help before offering it. But Jesus never said, ‘I was hungry and you checked if I had a job first.’”

She quoted Isaiah 58, Proverbs 31, and Micah 6:8, then addressed Huckabee’s final attempt to challenge her.

Huckabee: “But you still support abortion and same-sex marriage. You’re picking and choosing.”

Crockett: “The word abortion appears zero times in the Bible. Same-sex marriage, also zero. But caring for the poor? Dozens of times. Welcoming immigrants? Direct commands. Healing the sick? Over and over again. So if someone’s cherry-picking, Governor, it isn’t me.”

"I'm pretty sure that fella ain't here legally."

"Well, that ain't your business Chip, it's his."

They hate being preached to. If you pull out words like 'gender wage gap' they'll tell you you're brainwashed by the far left media.

"He's one of them transgenders."

Shut down the conversation without reacting.

"His dick, not mine" will get you much further to shutting that guy down than "well it's really inappropriate to call someone a slur while I'm the job site".

* I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream

*The King in Yellow

* The Lottery

* The Masque of the Red Death

* The Monkey’s Paw

* The Most Dangerous Game

* The Nameless City

* The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas

* There Will Come Soft Rains

*The Yellow Wallpaper

* The Veldt

* “you think those were fucked up? What about [X]!”

I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream by Harlan Ellison

The King in Yellow by Robert W Chambers*

The Lottery by Shirley Jackson**

The Masque of the Red Death by Edgar Allan Poe

The Monkey's Paw by W.W. Jacobs

The Most Dangerous Game by Richard O'Connell

The Nameless City by HP Lovecraft

The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas by Ursula K LeGuin

There Will Come Soft Rains by Ray Bradbury

The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman

The Veldt by Ray Bradbury

Honorable Mention from the comments/reblogs:

All Summer in a Day by Ray Bradbury

*note: this is actually a collection of short stories and clocks in at about 72k words

You can set your watches to backstabbing leftists lmao

Raising the minimum wage

Lowering drug costs

Removing tax-exemption status for Confederate groups

Progressive policies:

Bert: Bert and I

Ernie: Bert and I, we've been best friends forever, but we're also something else too!

ID 2: drawing of a person with glasses who's holding a bottle. The drawing is signed "Walter." Text reads:

The Story Behind Walterberry

Decades ago, our founder and CEO emeritus Dr. Dan Fischer was dissatisfied with the limited flavor options available in the dental market. Most products, if flavored at all, were an awful version of grape that children especially detested. He experimented with many different flavors, taste-testing them with his family—mint, bubble gum, licorice, even piña colada! Bubble gum was the clear winner among his children, but no single flavor was adored by both adults and children alike. So, he asked an Ultradent chemist named Walter to help.

B-17 bomber is riddled with German anti-aircraft fire but miraculously survives. Later they discover the explosive shells were all inert; sabotaged by Nazi slaves working in armament factories.