devojko pomagaj

That said, I’d love to see you blorbo post more!! Now I’m super curious what you’re interested in

yYeag, that's kinda. almost by design. It's a mix of consequences of being bullied a lot irl as a child and witnessing a lot of ridicilous drama happening in fandoms online as a teen, it just wore me down to a nub. And then the pandemic and... yeag ive just had a very demoralizing couple decades.

Also I feel like the escapism part of enjoying fiction and making art kinda ruined my enjoyment of fiction and making art? Instead of growing and letting myself develop my tastes and interests I just kinda stagnated by seeking out the like, next thing that'll bring me the same flavor of dopamine hit that the previous one did. But also since my default reaction to enjoying something a lot is anxiety and shame in case someone Finds Me Out and points and laughs, I never really managed to like. Indulge to the fullest. Truly like FEEL about it, the way I did when I was a kid. So I'd just lurk instead of being part of a community until naturally just passively looking at stuff and feeling stupid made it boring and miserable.

Except ofc with Princess Tutu, bcs by the time I was worn down I'd already had the dedicated blog and a small and chill community of like minded ppl and a kind of persona built around said blog thats pretty separate from literally everything else I do. Which makes it safe.

That and, the crest of a new wave of enjoyers that happened along with the edgelord poll(I cannot thank the edgelord poll enough, i really cannot) brought a lot of fresh perspectives to the show and sparked a lot of new and interesting discussions, which reignited my interest!