my regular tuesday suit

we need to start legally protecting these like make this kind of bathroom part of the national park system

your cat was an honor to see in the window

the first few times shane blows ilya and and ilya knows he's so eager to please and be The Best but he also wants shane to have a good time and to not hurt himself so he's like okay okay slow down, easy easy, dick is not going anywhere i promise, it's only your second time sucking dick ever you don't have to choke on it, please remember to breathe and at the same time shane is like if can't make him cry while i deepthroat it then what even is the point

In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

@theoutcastrogue

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

Sometimes your bad coworker will be like "I can't do anything right & I ruin everything I touch :(" and you can't even comfort them because like damn. Yeah. You really can't do anything right and you do ruin everything you touch☝️

HE'S GETTING FIRED. NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!!!!!!!!!!