Everyone shut up I'm hiding under her bed and trying to unplug the machine but my arms are too short to reach
Wait hold slide over my arms are longer.
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@luteroclockworker
Everyone shut up I'm hiding under her bed and trying to unplug the machine but my arms are too short to reach
Wait hold slide over my arms are longer.

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Hey I'm offering dice and card readings to anyone who drops me a tip on Venmo rn, I'm between jobs and it'd be baller to have some lunch money. I offer 7 dice readings, tarot readings, witch's runes readings, and old Norse rune readings.
Venmo: @abrahm-thrasher
Boosting my bud
collection
more
if i may
MORE
Spooktober in VRChat
Everyone go home this one wins
For the bone brothers
If I donāt reblog this: Iām dead. Avenge my death.
TP dump just threeĀ

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The "women want me, fish fear me" hat but with a third line that reads "fish women are conflicted about me"
I have only known Eido for 10 minutes, but if anything were to happen to her, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself
Please let us have a series of mini quests where we get better living conditions for the eliksni in the city and slowly improve it to a nice looking place
The eliksni deserve happiness and safety, and I will happily punt Lakshmi off the tower to achieve this
[footage of the inside of an ordinary Eastern-European home, taken with a handheld phone camera, the man filming is walking from the living room to the back door of the house]
man, narrating in russian: Every fucking year, this time of the year, the pond at my backyard gets infested. What do ponds get infested with? Frogs? Poisonous weeds? Geese? No. Not my pond.
[The man opens the back door, stepping out into a garden. Three or four nude, human-like figures dash from the borders of a pond back into the water.]
man: Rusalki! I don't know where they come from or how they get here, and I can't afford to hire an exterminator every year. I can't let my cat outside anymore. Last year a rusalka managed to drown a whole deer in my pond, the stench was unbearable.
[He walks as he speaks, approaching the pond. There are several eerily beautiful female beings peering at him from under the surface, their long hair floating in the murky water. Their eyes are gleaming in an unhuman way. The man holding the camera stops to film them.]
man, calm and deadpan: What the fuck are all of you staring at. Get jobs or something.
[One of the rusalki, smaller than the others and clearly not a fully matured adult, slowly reaches out of the water with her white, thin hand, grasping his ankle. He appears unconcerned.]
man: You can't drown me, you little idiot. You're too small. Shoo!
[A loud thud startles the rusalki, making them scatter. A second thud makes it clear these are the approaching footsteps of something massive. The man turns around and points the camera at what appears to be a house, walking past above the treeline with chicken-like legs]
man, now yelling: IF YOUR HOUSE SHITS ON MY YARD AGAIN I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD-
This post is a joy and a delight.
this is the energy
Okay I HAD to do this was just perfect

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Legolas sees Gimliās tiddies for the first time at the counsel of Elrond and bursts into tearsĀ ācause heās never wanted to be railed so bad in his life.Ā
Elrond misunderstands and is like tsk we must overcome our prejudices, Thranduilion 8-|
And then Legolas spends the entire quest like,
ive hung around tolkein discourse long enough to know the true irony here among elves- legolas is the bear, the max level of lumberjack possible for an elf among dwarves- gimli is the twink, silken haired refined poetry spouting
Im sorry but @significantfoliage you cannot leave this gem in the tags!
Sea Shanties 101: Let's explore
TYPES OF SHANTIES
If you've any experience in sea shanties, you've probably noticed they don't all sound the same. Some are slow, some are fast, and some are just downright sad! Well there's method behind the melody, and I'm here to tell you all about it!
A shanty frequently contains a CALL, which is what the shantyman would sing out, essentially the verses of the song, and the RESPONSE, which is what the men would sing back. For example in Haul Away Joe: the call is "Louis was the king of France before the revolution," and the response is "heave away, haul away Joe."
One of the first things to keep in mind is that shanties were used most frequently during tasks that required most of the crew. I'm now going to separate these types of work shanties into categories:
CAPSTAN SHANTIES: these shanties were used for repetitive work that was sustained, such as raising the ship's anchor at the capstan. Examples? Randy Dandy-Oh, Drunken Sailor, Eliza Lee, Barrett's Privateers (though this was written long after the age of sail!)
HALYARD SHANTIES: sung during tasks that took a very long time and required a break for a breath before the men started up again, such as hoisting a sail. Examples? Blow the Man Down, Leave Her Johnny, Hanging Johnny (Johnny really took the piss huh)
PUMPING SHANTIES: let's hope you didnt have to do a lot of pumping! Wooden ships were prone to leaking and so pumping out the water was necessary but tiresome work below decks. Examples? Santiana, Pump Shanty (surprise there)
SHORT-HAUL SHANTIES: for quick work, like shortening sails! Examples? Haul Away Joe, Paddy Doyle's Boots, Haul on the Bowline
There's some of our task shanties! Now why don't we go below and see what our off-duty men are getting up to?
Why, they're singing FO'C'SLE SHANTIES! These shanties are stories of life at sea, the work they'd done, the places they'd been, they can tell you a lot about a sailor's life. Examples? Rolling Down to Old Maui, Ben Backstay, All for me Grog
Fun! How about those far away in the polar seas hunting whales? Well I'm glad you asked because this is where we encounter WHALING SHANTIES! And yes, you guessed it, this is where Wellerman comes in! Other examples include Bonnie Ship the Diamond, The Greenland Whaler Fisheries
Now of course the most important rule of sea shanties is to have fun with your buds! Be sure to tell everyone you know about your newly-acquired shanty knowledge!
Chaotic academia is
1.) Intense obsessions that last maybe two weeks but consume your soul
2.) Spacing out in class but loving to learn
3.) Swearing and slang while discussing deep academic topics
I have been diagnosed with ADHD
goood morning
goood afternoon gamers i see we all need therapy

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I-
I don't even know at this point
Every DnD game that starts out with a serious āLord of the Ringsā type of tone turns into a Monty Python sketch and every DnD game that starts out like a Monty Python sketch turns into Lord of the Rings
DnD game with characters named Kua the Brave, Enoch Bluehelm, and Hallow Greaves: Our current mission is to save the kingdom from the Dark Queen Ravenbone but we fucked up a charisma roll and now Kua and Ravenbone are dating and the king of Fendale was turned into a frog
DnD game with characters named Bunny Wabbit, Ford Trukk, and Dildo Baggins: Our current mission is to find a birthday present for a spoiled prince but in the process we found a lich planning to devour the life force of everyone in the land and Dildo gave his life to stop him in a scene so moving it won the Newberry Medal
If you give your players room to do whatever they want, including be silly, they will most often choose to express themselves. And you'd be amazed how much you'll start to care about characters once people have attached little pieces if their soul to them.
If you try to enforce a "serious" tone, it just makes the gags funnier, and your players will treat you with the same casual blasphemy orangutans show to God.
"the same casual blasphemy orangutans show to God" WHAT THE FUCK I'M DECEASED