was LuciferBecons

i was speaking with a guy i work with and when leaving i said okay see you monday and he went oh no i wont be in monday. im going bald. and i said ?you're what? and he just repeated im going bald monday. wont be in

update: he didn’t show up on Monday and on Tuesday he was bald

they call it amtrak because the trains am on the trak

there's like a thousand ways for a shower to work and you wouldn't even imagine half of them until you have to take a shower at a new place

Things to do with your twin

Actually, there's one more surprise! Look under your seat right now :)

can't believe you fell for it again LMAO

honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

i enjoy the miserable girl character.

if you have adhd and someone says "you don't have to do that right now, you can do it later! :)" they mean well, but that is the devil speaking. you will NOT do it later. do it now!!!