^^ Slight side note:
When I was online dating I used to do what so many of us do; set up a safety check with a friend. I used to be really slick about it; take a restroom break or quietly/subtle check and answer a text. Then I realized what a good marker it was to check if I wanted to actually be on this date at all. So at whatever time check in was supposed to be, I would pull out my phone and say “sorry, I just have to let my friend know I’m good”. If someone was vaguely offended, I might stay depending on the convo we had after. If someone was SUPER offended, I said “this is exactly why. Thanks for meeting me, I’ve got to go.” This happened three times I can remember and the first time my voice was shaking so bad as I said it because, you know. You never know what their response is going to be and he was so aggressively angry I was ending the date “over that”.
The person I ended up with? “Ah, yay-I’m-not-murdered check. Good plan.” Then when my phone was buzzing later (because we ended up on a five hour date on a Monday night) he goes “you should probably let them know you’re still alive. Do you have to go?”
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