Life of Han Comic

i see posts here about how people are so mortified when they are acknowledged as being a regular customer somewhere that they never return. cowards. the employees at taco bell treat me like a celebrity. like royalty. i am their strange little pet customer who gets traded along as staff comes and goes. they know my car before i even speak in the drive-thru speaker. today i was 2 hours late and she ran over and squealed that she "thought i'd left them!" and that she "made my order with extra love!" and you what, she did

it's funny that this is getting notes again, because last night i went to the thai place in my neighborhood. it's run by a family and during covid times i ate there literally almost every day. later i cut back on eating out so much and hadn't been there in two years but last night we went and ate inside for the first time ever and the owner ran over to say hello and ask how i was, and repeated our old regular order. it was sweet. it's so easy to feel like you are an island, but stuff like this reminds you that you are part of a community.

Being a regular is fucking awesome. I've only had that status a few times, but I always feel kind of honored. These people see humans all day every day, and they remembered me?! And not for something bad (as far as I can tell)! I'm flattered af!

Being a regular is the best. Sometimes my DD coffee order is ready before I make it to the front of the line. I walk into my local Vietnamese restaurant and the guy in the back just calls out "you want your usual?" without bothering to get a menu for me; I sit down and they're already bringing out the plate of toppings and my drink while the rest of the order gets set up. I get the best local gossip waiting at the pizza place. It's awesome.

I walked into a place a couple weeks ago to get lunch, and the lady at the register was like, "I was telling them I'm surprised to see you! You're normally here after dark!" Which I am there for dinner most of the time! But I didn't think that they'd ever recognize me, they have so many customers come and go! I'm not even there that often! It was kinda nice, especially since I was feeling pretty depressed and like I didn't matter to anyone. But the lady at the pizza place near my house made me feel a little better.

My friends and I had a list of the various levels of regular for our local Alternative bar- hardest to achieve/highest was furniture, as they'd pretty much just sweep up under you at closing time because it was that or let you help them clean up :P Coffee shops that knew me were great, because my order would be ready, and I'd have my money ready- with a warm smile for them, because I felt cared for.

Buffy... gotta call her Buffy, I swear to Bob, Buffy...

Lakes and graveyards are very similar in that if you detonate a large explosion inside either one a lot of dead bodies come to the surface.

Hi, um. How is being the necromancer's apprentice going for you OP?

You want I should raise dead, I raise dead, no problem. You want banish dead, no problem, have plenty more nitro. I do this, ten minutes.

CHUNKY STEW IS NOT BANISHMENT.

Chunky stew, very bad necromancer. We banish, no problem, no chunks. I give you number of cousin Yvgeny. Will power wash house, very good prices. No other necromancer does this for you.

Is....is...is Yvgeny....alive?

Eh. Is alive enough.

See, I read that in the voice of the guy from Atlantis with the dynamite :P

Thor would find it very hilarious, appeal to him, I know he'd do it just for shits and giggles...

look, it's easy, okay? High Fantasy has An Hero whose Destiny is Sword, and Low Fantasy has Some Schmoe whose Job is Sword.

expanding it to a full matrix: Sword And Sorcery has An Hero whose Job is Sword, and YA Fantasy has Some Schmoe whose Destiny is Sword.

wow, this is an exceptionally effective taxonomy.

I read 'YA Fantasy' as 'ya fantasy', like, some gangsta got isekai'd there and now has to fight the big bad :P

Words cannot describe how happy I am that this resonated with so many people.

I'm fairly certain the intrusive thoughts in my head are just Statler and Waldorf, really :P

~Lord Puffington :P

do you guys have tumblr

no

Cringey internet stud-muffin.

reverse transcriptase dominatrix wild card, which I will gladly take :D