And it was *amazing*

U dont understand i had to write the first 70,000 words because if i didnt the sex wouldnt be as perilous or emotionally fraught. Which is the POINT.

Maybe quantum physics is different in a universe where a mob boss built a working supercollider that could create portals to other worlds in 2018

I thought that only the bag of chips was knitted so I was like lmaoo fucking idiot bird got owned then I saw that the bird was knitted as well then I realized I was the fucking idiot bird getting owned

Happy 10th birthday to tumblr user 2-shane-s being the fucking idiot bird getting owned

I think maybe the thing I like most about the human race is that we will invent something completely, utterly, blazingly stupid and then do it because it brings joy. This is so dumb. This is so awesome. This makes me so happy.

I like to imagine King Arthur refused to believe he was adopted as a child because if your mean older brother said “You’re not even related to us, a wizard dropped you off at our house when you were a baby.” you would be sooooo skeptical.

But maybe less so if there was an actual wizard fucking around all the time?

Trying to sleep during a heatwave is a great reminder that all oil executives need to die painful painful deaths

good suggestion

Going to sleep with the blinds closed for the first time in a millennium (at least)