how do i make this ironic

partially-managed mental illness is so fucking funny i'll be sitting around doing my job and suddenly think "wow i hate myself" and immediately get confused because, like, that's not TRUE! i love myself so much. who are you to talk to me like that

Bro wants to be a fop but he's barely dapper

Bro called himself bohemian with zero joie de vivre

did anybody else feel like an intense hyperempathy towards the hoodwinked schnitzel guy. i got really sad when he lost his schnitzel truck or something

Item: Corset of Visibility

Every time you are at ease while being misunderstood your cells improve nutrient absorption by 10%

My old person take today is that I feel like people have normalized being on your phone every single moment including when you're spending "quality" time with others so much that they're defensive if someone isn't ok with it. Yes, you have a problematic relationship with your phone and social media if you physically cannot put it down for a couple of hours to like, have dinner with your friends. It's a show of respect for other people's time and energy as well as important to be present and connect with people around you. Your parents who told you no phone at the table were right for that one.

… I am unironically here for this

this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life