think i'm not a goddess? try me.

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MKP's thematic bookmark collections on AO3: Fandom-Specific Thematic Collections: Dead Boy Detectives (parent collection) Multifandom Thematic Collections: knowing why (fics about late and adult diagnosis of autism) | Littles and Middles and Bigs (Oh My!) (mkp's ageplay fic recs, weighted towards but not exclusively non-sexual ageplay) | mkp's favorite takes on omegaverse and bio-bdsm or similar aus

MKP’s Fic & Fannish Content: @thefannishmkp | MKP’s Poetry & Original Content: @theoriginalmkp | MKP’s Poetry Fan Blog: @anotherarspoetica | MKP’s ND Reaction Gifs Blog: @hashtagactuallyautisticreactions | MKP's Edits & Graphics: #i made this! | MKP's Coloring: #color me happy

A Note to Artists, Writers, etc.

You may notice me liking your posts but not reblogging them! Do not be too disappointed - odds are that I am reblogging them but they've gone into the Great Vortex of Queued Posts; check your notes again in like... 10-20 business days.

Before You Follow: Content Warnings

Shane Hollander isn't allowed to get back on the ice until his (barely!) sprained ankle heals. It's been two days of light-stretching only, and he's going fucking insane. So, like anybody would, he decides to deep-clean the house while Ilya is at practice. He gets caught.

(Words: 6,311)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:game.changers.|.heated.rivalry.-.all.media.types +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) +fandom:game.changers.series.-.rachel.reid ::rating:explicit ::category:m/m character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov relationship:shane.hollander.&.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:married.shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:shane.hollander.loves.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:ilya.rozanov.loves.shane.hollander ~ao3:hockey.injuries ~ao3:minor.injuries ~ao3:anxious.shane.hollander ~ao3:autistic.shane.hollander ~ao3:no.smut ~ao3:bdsm ~ao3:sub.shane.hollander ~ao3:dom.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:good.boy.shane.hollander ~ao3:shane.hollander.has.a.praise.kink ~ao3:oh.did.i.mention ~ao3:praise.kink ~ao3:domestic.discipline ~ao3:spanking ~ao3:non-sexual.spanking ~ao3:and.just.to.be.safe ~ao3:non-consensual.spanking ~ao3:but.trust.shane’s.right.where.he.wants.to.be.he.told.me.himself ~ao3:crying ~ao3:aftercare ~ao3:author.did.not.use.ai ~ao3:fuck.ai ~ao3:you.can.pry.oxford.commas.and.em-das

JJ ok why don't you tell me what your type is since the last four men were no good Mon Capitane🫡 I'm just not interested in dating right now! JJ right but no one said you had to date these guys. just some fun with them😏😏 — Cens groupchat Roz i need someone to take out Boiziau in next game no questions asked

(jj tries to matchmake for shane after finding out he’s gay. things unfold. ilya crashes out. jj finds out a little more) (Words: 2,131)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) ::rating:not.rated ::category:m/m character:jean-jacques.boiziau.|.j..j..dagenais relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:texting ~ao3:relationship.reveal ~ao3:jealousy ~ao3:matchmaking ~ao3:everyone.wants.shane.and.he.is.oblivious ~ao3:silly.and.unrealistic.lol ~ao3:redeemable.jj ~ao3:humor ~ao3:fluff ~ao3:crack ~ao3:social.media ~author:goldengalaxies

Shane Hollander is a lot of things. Achingly Canadian, disgustingly polite, distractingly beautiful, and probably the love of Ilya's life. Recently, it has come to Ilya's attention that lurking just under the surface of Shane's shining golden persona is someone who's....particular. In peculiar ways that don't fully make sense to him. He knows what they call it in Russia. It terrifies him. They say his mother had it, that it is why she...did what she did. Depression and...this thing. He tries to talk to Shane about it. It goes...so badly.

(Words: 26,757)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) +fandom:game.changers.|.heated.rivalry.-.all.media.types ::rating:mature ::category:m/m character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov character:cliff.marlow.|.cliff.marleau character:hayden.pike character:jackie.pike character:yuna.hollander character:david.hollander character:irina.rozanova relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:implied/referenced.suicide ~ao3:autistic.shane.hollander ~ao3:ilya.rozanov.is.trying.his.best ~ao3:shane.hollander.needs.a.hug ~ao3:ilya.rozanov.is.obsessed.with.shane.hollander ~ao3:shane.hollander.walks.ilya.rozanov.like.a.dog ~ao3:depression ~ao3:mental.health.issues ~ao3:schizophrenia.mentioned ~ao3:grigori.rozanov.can.get.fucked ~ao3:russian.psychiatry ~ao3:ableist.language ~author:winshieldwipernoises

Here are some facts: Six months ago, Ilya and Shane sat on Ilyas’ couch, in Boston, and said, we want to be more, even if it has to be in secret. Four months ago, Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander bought new houses. If asked, they would both say it was a complete coincidence. They were not asked, because most people do not browse Zillow for fun in their free time (Shane-) and the real estate of hockey players was of very limited interest to even the most hardcore fan. Two hours ago, Shane Hollander was bleeding out on the ice. Yuna and David Hollander were at least three hours away, at the exact moment their son hit the ice. Yuna Hollander is a perceptive woman. If she enters the house, she will know her son does not live alone. Here is the most important fact Ilya knows right now: Shane would not want to come out to his parents like this. Ilya has one hour to wipe his existence from his boyfriends’ house.

(Words: 7,885)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) ::rating:not.rated ::category:m/m character:ilya.rozanov character:shane.hollander relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:alternate.universe.-.canon.divergence ~ao3:episode:.s01e05.i'll.believe.in.anything.(heated.rivalry) ~ao3:hockey.injuries ~ao3:suicidal.thoughts ~ao3:established.relationship ~ao3:what.if.ilya.and.shane.dug.themselves.into.a.very.deep.hole.and.looked.around.and.said."wow.we.could.make.a.home.here" ~ao3:microhome.but.it's.living.in.the.closet ~ao3:shanes'.injury.is.worse.than.canon.but.not.career.ending. ~author:ghoulien

Galina stopped writing to look at Ilya. "Do you think he'd be willing to talk to you next time it happens, even if it's late?" Ilya's stomach turned over. He didn't even want to consider it, but he knew the answer. "Yes. But he silences his phone at night." "Most phones these days have an option to let certain numbers ring through, even on Do Not Disturb. Do you think he'd be open to setting that up for you?" Imagining that conversation made Ilya nauseous. Yes, no fucking doubt, Shane would be open to it if Ilya explained the reason. "I'm not going to ask him to do that."

Set during The Long Game, an alternate version where the plane scene doesn't happen. Instead, there's this: a car crash, a therapist's duty to report, and an urgent reckoning with priorities. (Words: 37,182)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) +fandom:game.changers.series.-.rachel.reid ::rating:explicit ::category:m/m character:ilya.rozanov character:shane.hollander character:galina.molchalina character:hayden.pike character:yuna.hollander character:david.hollander character:original.characters character:troy.barrett character:jackie.pike relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:alternate.universe.-.canon.divergence ~ao3:book.6:.the.long.game.(game.changers) ~ao3:spoilers.for.book.6:.the.long.game.(game.changers) ~ao3:car.accidents ~ao3:whump ~ao3:suicidal.thoughts ~ao3:depression ~ao3:panic.attacks ~ao3:depressed.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:anxious.shane.hollander ~ao3:autistic.shane.hollander ~ao3:hospitalization ~ao3:implied/referenced.suicide ~ao3:angst.with.a.hopeful.ending ~ao3:established.relationship ~ao3:medical.inaccuracies ~ao3:medical.procedures ~ao3:hurt/comfort.but.the.comfort.is.kind.of.delayed ~ao3:i.promise.it.turns.out.okay!!!!! ~ao3:mental.health.issues ~ao3:eventual.smut ~ao3:com

The phone was still ringing. Shane took a deep breath and pressed answer. “Hello?” He was immediately met with an overwhelming cacophony of noise. “Hollaannddeerrr!” Rozanov’s voice screamed into the phone, fighting to be heard over the sound of deafening Russian club music, the heavy beats making Shane’s phone vibrate.

Or Moscow to Montreal: Drunk Dials Five times Ilya Rozanov drunk dials Shane Hollander in the summer of 2016, and one time Shane drunk dials back. (Words: 8,825)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) +fandom:game.changers.series.-.rachel.reid ::rating:explicit ::category:m/m character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov character:svetlana.vetrova character:hayden.pike character:jackie.pike character:hayden.pike's.children character:ruby.pike character:jade.pike relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:5+1.things ~ao3:alcohol ~ao3:drinking.&.talking ~ao3:drunk.dialing ~ao3:drunk.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:drunk.shane.hollander ~ao3:dirty.talk ~ao3:smut ~ao3:phone.sex ~ao3:jerking.off ~ao3:masturbation ~ao3:mutual.masturbation ~ao3:anal.fingering ~ao3:skinny.dipping ~ao3:nudity ~ao3:flirting ~ao3:awkward.flirting ~ao3:situationships ~ao3:denial.of.feelings ~ao3:yearning ~ao3:mutual.pining ~ao3:angst ~ao3:developing.relationship ~ao3:miscommunication ~ao3:idiots.in.love ~ao3:ilya.rozanov.loves.shane.hollander ~ao3:shane.hollander.loves.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:jealous.shane.hollander ~ao3:ilya.rozanov.is.bad.at.feelings ~ao3:shane.hollander.is.bad.at.feelings ~a

SHANE HOLLANDER, center, Ottawa Centaurs; Gerald's owner: Gerald was started on September 14th, 2009, at approximately 4:30 in the afternoon. I used a combination of organic rye flour and filtered water at 78 degrees Fahrenheit. The ambient kitchen temperature was 71 degrees, which is within the acceptable range for initial fermentation, though the lower end. I kept detailed notes. I still have them. [He showed me the notes. They are in a composition notebook, written in small, precise handwriting. The first entry reads: "Day 1. Mixed 50g rye flour + 50g water (78°F). Covered with cloth. Placed on counter away from direct sunlight. No activity yet. Expected." There are years of entries. The notebook is the third volume.] SHANE HOLLANDER: I don't understand the question. Why wouldn't I keep notes?

(Words: 6,142) | Part 2 of babushka (aka shane's grandma lifestyle)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) +fandom:game.changers.series.-.rachel.reid ::rating:general.audiences ::category:m/m character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov character:hayden.pike character:lapointe.(game.changers) character:original.character character:brandon.wiebe character:jean-jacques.boiziau.|.j..j..dagenais relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:shane.hollander's.grandma.hobbies ~ao3:autistic.shane.hollander ~ao3:shane.hollander.loves.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:ilya.rozanov.loves.shane.hollander ~ao3:oral.history ~ao3:ottawa.centaurs.player.shane.hollander ~ao3:alternate.universe.-.canon.divergence ~ao3:love.languages ~ao3:comedy ~ao3:gerald.the.sourdough.starter ~ao3:multimedia ~ao3:pov.outsider ~author:moonamona

"What would you say?" Shane asks, tightly, "If you were playing for Montreal." "You want to practice chirping?" Ilya asks, a bit dubiously (and probably rightly so; he's heard enough of Shane's prepared statements over the years, has heard him read a teleprompter, has seen his stiff ads-) "No. No," Shane is emphatic, "I just. Want an idea. Of what to expect." Ilya takes a pull on his water bottle, eyes trained on Shane. He swallows, before replying, "You have played just as long as me. With dirtier team." "Hey," Shane protests, laughing a little, but Ilya doesn't smile back.

Shane wants to be prepared for anything Montreal will throw at him on the ice. (Words: 2,924)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:game.changers.|.heated.rivalry.-.all.media.types +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) ::rating:explicit ::category:m/m character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:post-book.6:.the.long.game.(game.changers) ~ao3:light.angst ~ao3:happy.ending ~ao3:homophobic.language ~ao3:established.relationship ~author:trustingno1

This is not the first time Leonide has been guided to the Argument Lounge. Since her first arrival I have had drones marked on her position at all times, though this will be the first time we are in the same room together. Oh. Perhaps this is why Perihelion and SecUnit M.1.0 told me Leonide’s destination. With a non-functioning governor module, I could leave the room without telling anyone why or where I am going. Still, I do not leave.

or, SecUnit 003 speed runs a lot of rogue unit lessons and trauma. (Words: 10,128)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:the.murderbot.diaries.-.martha.wells ::rating:teen.and.up.audiences ::category:gen character:secunit.3.(murderbot.diaries) character:murderbot.(murderbot.diaries) character:art.|.perihelion character:holism.(murderbot.diaries) character:leonide.(murderbot.diaries) relationship:murderbot.&.secunit.3.(murderbot.diaries) relationship:art.|.perihelion.&.secunit.3 relationship:holism.&.secunit.3.(murderbot.diaries) relationship:art.|.perihelion.&.murderbot ~ao3:post-book.7:.system.collapse ~ao3:pov.multiple ~ao3:secunit.003.centric ~ao3:secunit.related.trauma ~ao3:so.many.secunit.headcannons ~ao3:minor.character.death ~ao3:panic.attacks ~ao3:self-harm ~ao3:implied/referenced.self-harm ~ao3:secunit.bonding ~ao3:discussion.of.genocide ~ao3:the.corporation.rim.is.terrible.(murderbot.diaries) ~ao3:mild.gore ~ao3:threats.of.sexual.assault ~ao3:dead.dove:.do.not.eat ~ao3:hurt/comfort ~ao3:just.two.secunits.doing.their.best ~author:biorusted

Ilya is fourteen, the first time he jerks off to the idea of causing someone pain. (an exploration of sadism and desire) (Words: 2,226)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) ::rating:explicit ::category:m/m ::category:multi character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov character:sasha.|.ilya.rozanov's.coach's.son character:(brief.mention).-.character relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov relationship:ilya.rozanov/other(s) relationship:(past) ~ao3:sadism ~ao3:bdsm ~ao3:kink.discovery ~ao3:dacryphilia ~ao3:painful.sex ~ao3:see.authors.note.for.full.list ~ao3:do.not.post.on.twitter/tiktok/instagram ~author:r_knight

“Why was the fucking balcony door open?” “I had cigarette,” Ilya admits in a guilty rush. “You don’t like the smoke. I was—trying to get it out before you came. And then you were here, and I—” And then Shane was here, and any hope of thinking about absolutely anything else had vanished into the chill of the night air. But he can’t say this, can’t say that the world narrows to a fine point when Hollander enters a room, that Ilya can finally fucking get in air when all he has to do is touch Shane like breathing and not carry Cups and build legacies and grin and bear it for cameras and share a last name and an ankle-weight of a country with his father. “Sorry,” Ilya tells him again, hating the way his voice trembles.

(Words: 2,429)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) +fandom:game.changers.series.-.rachel.reid ::rating:mature ::category:m/m character:ilya.rozanov character:shane.hollander character:cliff.marlow.|.cliff.marleau character:ryan.carmichael relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:canon.divergence ~ao3:episode:.s01e02.olympians.(heated.rivalry) ~ao3:2014.mlh.awards.in.las.vegas.(game.changers) ~ao3:being.walked.in.on ~ao3:ruined.sex ~ao3:almost.being.outed ~ao3:(but.not) ~ao3:semi-explicit.sex ~ao3:protective.ilya.rozanov ~ao3:they.do.kiss.in.this.version.because.i.thought.they.needed.a.treat.for.the.trauma.i.put.them.through ~ao3:emotional.hurt/comfort ~ao3:use.of.first.names ~ao3:pining ~ao3:possibly.even: ~ao3:yearning ~ao3:pov.ilya.rozanov ~author:soldouthaz

one for each inch of 🍆 you want Shane had stared at that message for more cumulative time than he'd like to guess. Nine inches was a lot of inches. Obviously he was aware that Rozanov might be exaggerating for effect — some of the guys called him a liar, but he was more of a storyteller, Shane thought — but a penis could really get that big. He had checked.

(Words: 3,356)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:heated.rivalry.(tv) ::rating:explicit ::category:m/m character:shane.hollander character:ilya.rozanov character:a.massive.dildo relationship:shane.hollander/ilya.rozanov ~ao3:porn.by.way.of.overthinking ~ao3:truly.just.shane.being.anxious ~ao3:and.using.a.dildo.about.it ~ao3:masturbation ~ao3:also.partnered.sex ~ao3:but.like.way.less.of.that ~ao3:shane.does.not.have.a.size.kink.but.he.is.prepared.to.do.what.it.takes ~ao3:nine.inches ~ao3:is.so.many.inches ~ao3:dick.measuring ~ao3:under.non-regulation.conditions ~ao3:that.one.text ~ao3:obviously ~ao3:one.goal.for.each.inch.of.the.🍆.you.want ~ao3:my.phone.now.thinks.i'm.wild.for.the.🍆.btw ~ao3:it's.now.my.top.suggested.emoji ~ao3:thanks.rozanov ~author:thegoblinmatriarch

This is a reference document for SecSysLang, my fanon conlang for SecUnits, SecSystems, HubSystems, etc. to use when talking to each other. This also contains some amount of meta from the actual canon; SecSysLang assumes that all the SecUnits and SecSystems in canon actually use SecSysLang, and Murderbot just translates it into words for us. Feel free to use/adapt/take inspiration from/modify etc. SecSysLang in your own fanworks! (Words: 1,902)

!!!fandom !!fic |site:ao3 +fandom:the.murderbot.diaries.-.martha.wells ::rating:general.audiences ~ao3:meta ~ao3:secsyslang ~author:saaabriel

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(hyphen is the equivalent of a less than sign; yes these are bizarre intervals probably but I decided I need some logic to it that wasn't just vibes so! 5k (4k) range; 10k range; 15k range; 20k range; 25k range; 50k range; 75k range; 100k range)