I Am.

he was fucking just eating cookie dough alone on the dance floor I can’t handle this

it is my great pleasure to share with you that the “cookie dough” was in fact cocaine and HONY censored the story for publication

lifehack: when you see a Take One candy bowl in a restaurant, wait until noones looking and shovel candy into your pockets. god may judge you but his sins outnumber your own

“God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own.” We really need to start collecting and sourcing these Potent Quotables.

Pretty sure it was the second Spy Kids movie

my name backwards spells “disappointment and skin problems”

nice to meet you, Smelborp Niks Dna Tnemtnioppasid

You really shouldn’t put your full name on the internet, it’s not safe.

I’m done

Smelborp for president

“you all are great people, and what you’re doing is art, but it’s also a crime punishable by 28 days in prison” is a real sentence that got said to me tonight by a security officer i think i’m living my best life

my healthcare plan is if i get sick, i’ll shrink a group of my friends and they’ll go and beat the shit out of whatever illness i have. 

if fall out boy come off hiatus i’m dropping out of school and following them around the world via kayak 

too beautiful not to reblog

I am so proud of this person

Congragulations, you basically just killed your chance to get payed anything higher then minimum wage in America, to follow a band around.

why do all americans on this website assume everyone else is american that is what i want to know

The sheet says Phoenix… A city in Arizona… In… The U.S. …

and above that it says Melbourne…. A city in Victoria… In…. Australia…. because phoenix…. is…… a song 

This still really is incredibly stupid tho

IT GOT BETTER

Still a bad idea to drop out of school to follow a band. Not a wise decision

Been a while since someone replied to this post and I think it’s good time to remind u all that I’m in law school now xxxxxx

I have immense respect for op

Also op said that they would follow them around the world, so like it wouldnt matter if one tour ticket said a US city or an AUS city, we still wouldn’t know where they lived.

Omg these are so cute!!! need 😍

Want

Tumblr Code.

This is an absolute tumblr relic. I feel like an archaeologist right now. This is incredible that this is on my dash.

this is from an era long passed

An ancient artifact

rebloging this because maybe now I can stop feeling like a horrible person at stores because now I can fix it!!

SAVE A LIFE

Hey - please folks. If you take a shirt from a pile, re-folding will go a long way to making those clothing dept. employees happy and their jobs just a little easier.

how many people could be working on actual problems in the world instead of being forced to do jobs that they are over-qualified for just because they dont want to go homeless and starve?

climate change is threatening to kill us and people with biology degrees are working at starbucks if they didn’t get lucky in the nepotism department.

Millions of people want to be doctors but can’t afford medical school, it is a well known fact we don’t have enough doctors for the demand. hmm wow real efficient capitalism.

He discovered true power in wearing a wig.

I FELT that “biitch”😂

What the fuck am I looking at here?

How is this so visually unintelligible?

dug up this explanation from the notes because it was driving me insane

The one time the answer to “am I having a fucking stroke” was “yeah kinda”

i know this might be hard for some people to digest but……sometimes laws are wrong

steve rogers ghostwrote this vaguepost to stark about the accords.

do u nerds ever stop talking about your make-believe people