Ready, Set, Fly

using "what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament" to mean "yeah i made an embarrassing reference but you understood it which is also embarrassing" is very funny to me

my favorite part is that absolutely nobody says this except here. so if you use it in public, it's a dead giveaway that you spent the last ten years on tumblr. but then again, they recognized it, which means they were at the devil's sacrament

snake bit me today (non-venomous) (i deserved it)

once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)

taylor swift would release a 30th special edition of the tortured poets department to block the vampire lestats spot on the billboard chart and within 24 hrs travis kelce would go missing

i’m on that weird shit. i’m jacking odd. disturbating. creeping my meat

[Image description The background for Blues Clues with Benoit Blanc from Knives Out]

Now I’m naht puhticularly familiuh with how everything wurks around heeuh, but I- I do buhlieve we just gawht a lettuh… wonduh who it’s from…

Now, one might look at these numbers and be lead to believe that half of all tumblr users don't read posts. However, in the replies to this post you will find over a hundred users who will happily clarify to you that actually the reason why they voted the way they did isn't cause they didn't read the post but actually because they didn't bother to look at the words in the post and process them as language, a technique commonly referred to as reading the post.

i appreciate the amount of people reblogging this despite me not really tagging this at all. im glad many of people feel the same anger i do.

no matter how little you think you know about history you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it because there is always someone who knows less than you and is more confident about it. someone once said that bridgerton was medieval to me

another person also thought that the middle ages were the period in between wwi and wwii so you should always be proud of yourself for having any sort of knowledge about the medieval period. i’m proud of you for not thinking fdr was an important medieval figure.