normal about everything always

How about Other people start worrying about how I perceive them

she's right cause I'm gonna fucking get her

Apple has announced a new emoji of a little gay guy getting fucked in the butthole by a big gay guy and an emoji of a big gay guy getting fucked in the butthole by a little gay guy

you have to read to your kids you have to read with your kids you have to read in front of your kids you have to take your kids to the library you have to talk about books with your kids you have to let your kids read books that are a little difficult or scary you have to teach your kids to love reading

Yeah sorry I can't come into work today. I accidentally heard Primadonna by Marina formerly of and the Diamonds. So I need the day to be a primadonna girl. Yeah it's going to be the whole day.

Oh my fucking god.

JESUS CHRIST

I’m still amazed at how they got a “noot noot” to sound so much like a “fuck you”

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business

this is america son you rip that cart til it tastes like pool liner gotdammit

theres a whole album of song titles you can make just from the words of this tweet

this makes smoking weed sound so much cooler than it is

Dude frying my tendies at the raising cane's has the black nitrile gloves over the hairy forearms this is not good. Puppy's leaking. The situation in my Target boxer briefs is gonna go from Gushers to Go-Gurt real fast here. I'm so horny I deserve to have copper wire snaked through my teeth

If the backrooms post can get a movie then so can this

I want to believe

"we cut the nobody scene from the odyssey" "we cut the religious trauma and parental abuse from carrie" i'm starting to think that studios barely funding original films is starting to have an effect where directors make up a story and then slap an IP on it in order to sell. or maybe some bitches just can't read anymore idk it's one or the other

anti abortion propaganda that tries to like scare you into feeling guilty by reminding you that the fetus has body parts are so funny. "uwu please don't abort me I have eyes at 4 weeks old 🥺" nice try sucker I don't care if you see it coming