im 9 years old and i work for nintendo

The funniest thing you can add to any piece of media is a boy detective. Breaking Bad needed a 13 year old child who goes around looking for clues to the caper and whatnot.

Hank

she’s grinding pathetically on my thorax

the most important part of blood loss is to have fun and be yourself

its called a cd because it stands for compact disc

its called a dvd because it stands for digital versatile disc

it’s called a blu ray because it stands for blue ray

it’s called a cassette because that’s what it’s called

why does uber give me notifications like “hey… do you wanna take an uber rn?” As if I’m ever just chilling like yeah a $40 car ride would go crazy right now

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

its like ive never seen herbivore

pranking my horse by feeding it a chicken bullion cube rather than one of sugar