everything will be okay

I’ve tried a few porn games, but all they have such bad user design. so like one of the games was a platformer, I thought okay, I used to play mario, this’ll be no problem. WRONG. I couldn’t even get through the first level. two straight hours of missing the same jumps and near sobbing about it. at what point am I supposed to get horny? I can’t even reach the naked demon lady because I CANNOT! MAKE! THE JUMPS! so I try another game about seducing milfs. you need to clean the milf’s house to make her like you. okay, I have limited energy per in-game day, so I vacuum her house, I tidy her magazines, I clean her dishes, I go to sleep. this repeats for days. the milf still doesn’t like me. why?? I’ve spent real hours of my life vacuuming her digital floor. why won’t the milf fall in love with me? what am I doing? what am I doing?

not to be a pedantic hater but i wish tumblr accent wasn't the commonly used term to describe tumblrina typing quirks and phrases bc that is Not an accent it's a dialect!!

what's the difference here?

i could smell your boytoy coming from down the road. Wretched little rotted morsel of a thing, may he fall to time and become carrion

all i'm getting from the tags and replies on this post is the butter pillow has cast a devious spell on most of you. you have fallen for the trap of the butter pillow.

how easily the human will crumples in the face of the butter pillow

Absolutely fascinating use of free will. Was it always your life's goal to get electrocuted in the shower while your screams are drowned out by the screams of The Machine?

also have you, perchance, considered un-making it

Hey jsyk op of that post disgraced their dojo

Callout posts in the Draconis Combine be like:

am i allowed to say kill all trillionaires or is that too specific of a threat