Up To No Good

Not only that the language itself sounds straight out of a marvel forcibly funny haha moment, but Menelaus? The Menelaus who all thoughout human history, from Homer, to Sappho, to Euripides, to Virgil, to Shakespeare, to Brooke, to Barth; from Classical vases to Medieval poetry to Reinessance art, has been known as the man whose sword fell from his hands at the sight of his wife after 10 years apart?

"What joy for me to hold my wife" Menelaus?

"He flung the sword away, and kissed her feet" Menelaus?

"I believe all. I understand nothing. I love you" Menelaus?

"I have no fault to find; my wife, he daughter of Zeus and Leda, is mine again, she whom her brothers on their snow-white steeds, whilst torches blazed, made my happy bride, but gods removed her from my home." Menelaus?

The Menelaus who was picked out of the suitors by Helen herself? The Menelaus who couldn't kill a begging Trojan so his brother had to do it for him? The Menelaus who rescued Odysseus and got out Patroclus' body? The Menelaus who volounteered to fight Paris one on one so everybody could go home? Who kept expressing his guilt about himself being the cause of war through every assembly he spoke at in the Iliad? Who after 10 years away at Troy, took his wife through a 7-year long journey at sea back home, where he reinstated her as the queen of Sparta? Who wept like a child in front of Telemachus recalling the war and his brother and all the friends he lost and the only consolation being his wife' gentle hand on his?

You want me to believe that man scarred Helen's face and called her only worth half the ships because of it?

Woah indeed.

I was trained in the dark arts of the cover letter by my mother, who is a hiring manager. And her training has paid off: I've been consistently told my cover letters are excellent. Let me pass on the wisdom.

The job of a cover letter is to give a prospective employer strictly more information than is on the resume. This is where you take the resume contents and put them into context. You look at the job requirements (you are looking at the job requirements before applying, right?) and look at your resume and ask the question (in your head) "why would a person think this candidate would be good for this job?" and your cover letter is the answer to that question. If you don't answer that question, the hiring manager is going to have to do it themselves, and you have way more information to work with than they do.

This is especially important if you're moving from one industry to another, because then the relevant connections aren't obvious. It's also very important if you're overqualified, because then you can use the letter to say "I know it looks like this job would be too entry-level for me, but I'm interested to pursue it for reasons x, y, and z". You can also use this space to explain away something that might otherwise be disqualifying, like job-hopping or a long break in employment. The tone to strike here is always matter-of-fact and constrained to topic - don't go into detail about health stuff or personal tragedy, just tell them what they need to hear: that this period of your resume was affected by [bad thing] but that it's now in the past and you're looking forward to the next chapter. Remember, one of the things they're trying to learn is whether you'd be content in this role, or whether you'd be miserable and leave after 2 months, which would force them to do all the work of hiring again. You're trying to establish that you will fit right in and not cause problems. Knowing what drew you to this job in particular (and don't just say 'money', that's true for everyone) helps with that.

Meanwhile, Lassie sticks to last names across the board and does not change that. Juliet is probably his closest friend, and I can't remember a single time he ever used her first name. Gus stays Guster, even when nobody else calls him that, I like to think the only reason Victoria didn't get the last name treatment was because they were married and it would be weird to call someone by your own name. Or maybe he did, and that's what kicked off the divorce.

In contrast, Jules seems to default to first names unless the situation requires she doesn't. I think early on, that was show that she was new around here, and that she's friendly and personable. It also sort of hints at how fast she gets emotionally involved in things. We all know she goes way overboard when undercover, that just goes to show that she doesn't commit to names, she commits to entire fucking identities. I almost wonder if Shawn giving her a nickname subconsciously changed how she interacts with him. Like, if he had never called her Jules, would their dynamic still be the same? Many such questions

And lastly, Gus social mirroring personified. During the early seasons, he mirrored Lassie's insistence on sticking to full last names, but over time, started calling him Lassie alongside Shawn. Juliet has already just been Juliet, he mirrors her tendency to stick to first names. And maybe unrelated, but he seems to avoid calling Henry by name? It's always just "your dad" or "Shawn's dad" or even sometimes "Mr. Spencer." It's like he never had anyone good to copy, he can't call him what Shawn does, that not his dad, they're definitely not on a first name basis, and Mr. Spencer might be too formal. Idk I just thought that was a little funny