Stripey is my middle name. My first name is Keb.

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

Keep thinking about when my therapist explained to me that believing you are cursed is another form of believing you are special and I was like okay I see it

It kind of fucks with me that somebody killed ötzi the iceman because ötzi himself is like whatever but the silent presence of human hands that drew back the string of the bow that shot the arrow that killed him is crazy. the idea that there were various people involved in that situation and while one of them has had his last hours painstakingly reconstructed and studied to no end, the others now only exist insofar that an arrowhead had to get into his shoulder somehow. imagine killing someone and then suddenly your entire existence is only a vague shadow implied by the fact that you killed them. much to consider

Testing the mummified bone marrow of ötzi to figure out his ancestry whole time there’s definitely another person, maybe more than one, standing in the room with us but I can never see or speak to them because I only know them through the assurance that they were there too in the form of one single arrowhead. I hate prehistory so much it’s unreal

i go to a gay bar and notice the furry convention's in town. i see a fine lookin bear remove his fursuit, revealing that underneath, he's also a fine lookin bear. I raise my eyebrows and say "woof" and all the cat furries immediately hiss and scatter

I know we’re all like lawless nonconformists but you really can’t be texting and driving. that’s one of the ones you’ve gotta listen to for real

Opera plot: Local Noble realizes that his affections for Pretty Village Girl have a rival in the form of Honest Laborer. Having read enough romances to know that a girl asked to choose between a rich man and a poor man will always pick the poor man, whereas in a love triangle between two rich men it's anyone's game, he decides that his chief object must be to elevate his rival's wealth and status as quickly as possible. What the Compte de Genre-Savie over here forgot to account for, however, was the overwhelming power of the Pygmalion Effect, and now he has to deal with watching two people he's in love with develop ever-stronger feelings for each other. Eventually all of this resolves via...I don't know.

#first of all: ''comte de genre-savie'' is PERFECT. just great. absolutely no notes.#I would love an opera with this exact plot. bonus points if the comte is genuinely genre savvy#he keeps bringing up opera tropes only for the other characters to look at him like he's insane.#the score is diagetic to him; when he points out reoccurring themes or transitions to minor keys#the other characters ask him what the hell he's talking about. the whole chorus gets together to sing about how#comte de genre-savie is going mad. the comte tries to sneak away and keeps getting pulled back in.#I wonder if you could even push it further - have it so that only the comte can speak or 'hear' spoken words;#all other characters communicate in recitativo secco or formally composed songs#then you can have scenes where the comte is speaking but the other character in the scene can't hear him.#this can be played for laughs (the comte tries to order something from a shopkeeper; the shopkeeper walks away as he's talking)#and for dramatic effect (the Honest Laborer is singing a heartfelt duet with the Pretty Village Girl#and neither of them can hear the comte saying 'I love you' in between their lines)#........I am into this actually. I had to convince myself that this wasn't just cyrano de bergerac but no. it isn't. I'm into it.#upon the stage (via @notbecauseofvictories)

"everyone is paying super close attention to everyone else all the time" actualy statistical error. hypervigilance georg, who enters fight or flight when someone starts breathing differently, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

how to get up in the morning tutorial

how to get up in the morning walkthrough

how to get up in the morning tips and tricks

Stop doing it scared and start doing it scary. Invoke sheer eye-clawing terror into all those who have ever wronged you

its been said so many times before but i absolutely adore the fact that here on tumblr.com you can follow the most incredible artists writers etc and then like. they follow you back because you're Good At Reblogging. probably my favourite thing ever

everyone line up i've got one bottle of testosterone gel and there's 17,000 of you i'm about to pull a move not seen since jesus did the bread and fish glitch 2000 years ago

"comparing apples and oranges" has always been funny to me as an expression because people's go to exampe of two things so radically different that they defy any useful comparison are apples. and oranges. like you would struggle to find a more comparable pair of objects than that. theyre literally sold right next to each other in most stores.

big fan of the recent trend ive noticed of people adding flaming text of the original word over censored words in posts. do NOT sanitize the internet. say fuck with your chest