This one guy at work is like, just super sweet, just so nice and calm, and his phone started ringing and I just noticed the caller was “THE LOVE OF MY LIFE ❤️” and I just love knowing there are sincere loving men around.

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@kaikiky
This one guy at work is like, just super sweet, just so nice and calm, and his phone started ringing and I just noticed the caller was “THE LOVE OF MY LIFE ❤️” and I just love knowing there are sincere loving men around.

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To the surprising number of people commenting on animal rights posts to claim that "plants feel pain too":
Do you actually behave as if you believe that plants are capable of subjective experiences, despite having no nervous system and no brain? This is a serious question. Do you walk on grass aware of the fact that you’re potentially causing pain? Do you think about this when you’re eating spinach? Do you try your best to reduce the amount of “plant suffering” you are supporting through your purchases?
If the answer to all of these questions is no, then you probably don’t actually believe that plants feel pain. Or you do, but that belief is essentially meaningless since it makes no difference at all to your behaviour. If you’re thinking and talking about this exclusively in the context of debates with vegans then you are acting in bad faith.
That being the case, I think you then you have to ask yourself what it is about the claim that animals should have rights that you find so threatening. Why do you feel the need to occupy a troll position in an attempt to prevent an earnest conversation about the ethical issue of animal suffering?
I do appreciate how at my office, anytime someone from the public sends an email written in formal language, whoever got the email will do a performative reading of it for our entertainment.
People are really out here thinking writing formally makes you sound smart and respectable, but here on our end we just make fun of it.
God I wish people would just write and talk like normal people. No one wants to deal with your stiff, pompous attitude.
The christian family in these memes (which are absolutely all over facebook these days) genuinely do always look miserable. Who the fuck is relating to these stock mormon farm cultists. That is a couple who made love only once in pitch darkness with bags on their heads then celebrated the pregnancy with a feast of uncooked potatoes and warm tapwater. The baby seems intrigued though. Maybe only by the bottle of pills??
Could not leave this in the tags <3
the awe on her little face, she just realized there is hope
so there's a natural order to this world and we need atleast four million mans in boots with armor, vehicles, and firearms to enforce it, otherwise something unnatural might happen

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"that doesn't sound sincere- it sounds rehearsed" is one of the most devastating and fucked-up statements you can make to anyone in the neurodivergent/ADHD/Autistic/Schizophrenic/Disordered Personality sphere. yeah bitch it's rehearsed. because i wanted to get it right when i said it
I’ve recently discovered how much better life can be when we normalize this. My best friend and I have started saying “hang on, I’m scripting” when we need a minute to mentally rehearse during big conversations (and “bear with me, I’m doing improv” when we’ve reached the end of our script and start to struggle with words lol)
people will be like how come everything always comes back to race/gender/class/capitalism/imperialism with you well that is called living in a system
trying to explain why i love being aroace is like if love is the light spectrum romantic and sexual attraction are visible light and then every other possible kind of love is outside of the visible spectrum and it’s like. just wait till you guys find out about radio waves they’re actually really important in a lot of modern technology. same with x-rays and infrared. and if you guys knew where and how to look you’d actually see there’s way more light around you than you actually thought there was. you’ve trapped yourself in a fake box of what light is based on what you can see but if you try a little harder to look there’s so much more out there. visible light isn’t special just because it’s what you happen to be able to see, stars are made of all of it, every wavelength, visible light is just a fraction of their radiance. if you didn’t bother with visible light so much you’d be able to appreciate what light truly is so much better. just saying.
Happy pride to my fellow aro & ace homies ! ⚔️
I don’t have time to unpack my full thoughts on the whole argument of ‘you shouldn’t be a burden to the healthcare system’ but I would like to chime in on it:
so, all athletes should immediately stop playing sports. construction workers, anyone with jobs that put them at risk, they need to find different employment. people with uteruses shouldn’t ever get pregnant, either. actually you know what? don’t enter a car or vehicle at all! and don’t even get me started on old people. what age do we think they should just give it up & throw in the towel? 50? 60? after that they become way too burdensome. it’s a problem.
sweet baby eugenicist, your anger is misplaced. they want you to blame yourself instead of their crumbling system. you should be asking, what kind of a fucking healthcare system is it if it can be burdened by the very thing it exists to provide? which is healthcare?!

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I think if you want to understand bigotry against aromantics, I have a good case study. Let me talk a little about my dad's family.
My dad has 4 half siblings and two step siblings. They're all a decent bit younger than him. When I was a teenager, we went to a family reunion, and I realized something—my dad did not respect his siblings. He looked down on all of them. He saw them as fuck-ups and overgrown children. My dad had the American dream: well paying management job, suburban house, wife, and three kids. My aunt and uncles did not. Excluding my aunt, none of them were married or in serious relationships. They hadn't really settled into long term careers. Several of them were working the kind of jobs that get called "Unskilled labor." So he looked down on them because the youngest one was in his thirties (and several were much older), and yet none of them had "settled down" into what he saw as lifelong, permanent careers and relationships and lives. He was polite to their faces, sure, but I heard how he talked about them behind their backs, to my mother.
And then a few years ago, we visited his brothers again for Thanksgiving. And I realized something again--he respected them now. He saw them as equals. Why? Well. All of a sudden, every single one of them had serious, committed romantic partners. They didn't even need to still be with those partners—one of my uncle's fiance passed away from cancer before they could marry—just having had one showed that they matured into a real adult participating in society. In fact, at one point, my aunt was telling my mom about how one of my uncles was no longer living in an apartment she owned, but instead, after having a steady girlfriend for about a year, he moved in with her. And my mom literally said to my aunt, "wow. Look at that. He finally grew up."
One of the lines that frequently gets repeated about anti-aspec sentiment is "why would anyone hate asexuals/aromantics/etc? They aren't even doing anything." And that's exactly it. In the eyes of amatonormative culture, we aren't doing anything. Adults are supposed to do things. That's how you become a member of society.
I know that my father will never see me as a successful adult. He will never approve of my life. And I think most people would assume that that's because I'm trans. And don't get me wrong, he sure as shit doesn't like or respect that, but I do think if given enough time, he would get used to it. He would eventually realize that it isn't going away. And if I settled down with a spouse and a respectful job and a few kids, he could see me as a successful adult that he could be proud of anyway. But of course, that's not going to happen. Because I'm aromantic. So I'm never going to do that one thing that signifies that his job is complete, and I'm officially a full-fledged adult. I will perpetually be that fuck-up kid who won't settle down. In my personal case, that's okay. My dad is a conservative piece of shit, and if he doesn't approve of you, that just means you're doing something right. But on a societal level? This kind of attitude is a massive problem. Aromantics deserve to be treated like adults, and to feel like the accomplished adults that they are. We should feel like we belong in society.
the christian veneration of the lamb has always been terrifying to me in ways i can’t explain
here’s this figure that is vulnerable and easily abused and what’s admirable about it is that it doesn’t fight back and it doesn’t try to defend itself and it’s suffering is noble because it just sits there and takes it. pain is beautiful when you surrender to pain, suffering is godly when you don’t question or try to protect yourself and survival is ugly… like it is just me or is anybody else’s fucking skin crawling rn!!
And then they eat them
There is also a disturbing amountof talk about "sacrifice" and "honouring" the animals we confine, exploit and kill for profit.
personally I am of the opinion that vegans who are like “the way our food system currently works under capitalism on a large scale is exceptionally cruel to all animals including humans and is not sustainable, so I’m doing what I can to make the most ethical choices available to me about what I eat and encourage others to do the same” are generally very reasonable people who I agree with in spades. but vegans who seem to think human beings are not themselves animals who are ultimately also part of the food chain but instead some kind of other paternalistic higher entity that can never engage in ethical and sustainable hunting practices (and especially the fringe I’ve seen who think other carnivorous animal predators are also evil and need to be eliminated) are people I regard as foolish at best if not actively anti-indigenous and racist
veganism as an anti-capitalist endeavor in pursuit of greater liberation, not as a merely individual endeavor. veganism where everyone has a responsibility against animal agriculture, not just those who respect or empathize with non-human animals.
We are facing the largest mass extinction because people refuse to stop BUYING meat. Why do we have slaughterhouses while first nations people are facing food deserts? What you see is genocide and colonialism. Who cares about hunting. A deer died, yeah ok I'm sad but what about the millions of acres of habitat that were clear-cut for settler agriculture? A deer died but there will be more deer; there will be no more nēnē-nui. Turn the corn fields and CAFOs back into rainforests and rivers and grasslands.
It's not "veganism vs indigenous hunting," it's "veganism vs complicity in extinction." Animal agriculture took native lands away. Give it back. Stop buying animal products. Give it fucking back.
Yall don’t even listen to indigenous vegans or other vegans of color as a whole (in response to OP) so like
I don’t even understand what you’re saying
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imagine if people actually took romantic consent seriously. wouldn't it be fucking awesome. i know they never will, but just. take a moment and imagine it with me
no more "just give them a chance, maybe you'll end up liking them!", no more "if you're going to reject someone, at least apologize to them!", no more shaming people for breaking up/divorcing, no more demonizing people for rejecting other peoples' romantic advances, no more shoving romance in romance repulsed peoples' face on purpose to provoke us, no more "i know we agreed to just be friends with benefits, but i thought you were going to fall in love with me eventually!", no more "i can fix them" when the only thing "wrong" with them is that they want to fuck without dating.
wouldn't it be nice?
A friend I used to hang out with every week once confessed his feelings for me, which I didn't reciprocate. I wanted to stay friends, didn't see why we couldn't, we had been friends the whole time without any romance, why did that have to change? but he decided to stop hanging out with me.
I was heartbroken and felt tossed aside. I didn't understand why our friendship wasn't worth anything to him if he couldn't have me romantically or sexually. I felt betrayed and dehumanised, like I didn't matter to him as a person but only as a romantic prospect.
When I told other friends about it, to my surprise they all sided with him. "He is heartbroken, it's hard to get rejected" even my THERAPIST said this. It's not like I didn't empathize with him, but wasn't I rejected too? No one else could see that but me, they placed me as some sort of villain that had power over him in that situation, when all I did was set a boundary between friendship and romance. All I did was not consent to the terms he wanted for our relationship, I rejected them, my terms were different and he rejected those.
I've had my heart broken by friends over and over and it hurt the same, if not more, than any romantic heartbreak. Why is friendship undervalued next to romantic feelings?
To be honest, to this day I'm still pissed that no one sided with me on this. There's so much unraveling that needs to get done around how we view different relationships in our lives, and I feel like most people can't even scratch the surface when it comes to this questioning.
i desperately need people to stop avoiding what this post is actually about. stop derailing and trying to make it be about something else instead.
THIS POST IS ABOUT ROMANTIC CONSENT.
even if the person in question didn't want to fuck them, even if he just wanted a wholesome, purely romantic, nothing sexual at all relationship, it would STILL be fucked up to BLAME someone for rejecting that.
similarly, if someone really wanted to just fuck, but they were honest and clear about that, and handled rejection gracefully, there would be literally no issue with that.
when will you people understand what i thought i made incredibly fucking clear in the original post. the problem is not, and never was, the presence of potential sexual attraction. the problem is, and always has been, ignoring ROMANTIC CONSENT.
#people think that relationships are made of two parts#one part being ~Love~ (when it is Real it is perfect and pure and incapable of harm)#and Lust (dangerous and only ever potentially safe when tamed by a high amount of Real Love)#and thus they can only imagine that harm done in or relating to a relationship#is because of a lack of Real (romantic) Love + the presence of Lust#also i say relationship instead of just romantic relationship#because i dont think allo society is actually that good at distinguishing between types of relationships#they don't really see friendships between people who could potentially date as its own form of relationship#as much as a liminal space waiting room between being strangers and being romantic#anyways it's so fucking annoying how insistently people think that romance is only harmful because either#the person doesn't Really Love You or they ONLY want to fuck you (inherently a shallow thing to want as well!)#amatonormativity has such a grip people genuinely struggle to imagine that genuine feelings of romantic love#can be anything other than inherently good and beneficial#op you are NOT overreacting people just don't fucking understand what it's like being aroallo#and they don't give us nearly as much grace as we deserve when we get frustrated with this shit
keeping @genderkoolaid's tags because they are Important
you'll never believe. whose main blog that post was from. hi, it's me, tumblr user radioactive-yuri, formerly known as thermodynamic-comedian. this is my side blog. and a good few years ago, i made that very post on my main blog.
i have been fighting in these trenches. for YEARS.
Then only privilege going on here is being so privileged you believe your taste buds are more important than another individual’s life.
source: emptycages.vegan
My problem with veganism has always been threefold... With the first being the biggest point of damnation in my eyes.
It presumes there is morality in the consumption of living matter. But only in matter they consider relatable to their experience and not in the consumption of living matter that they -don't- find relatable to their experience. Plants SCREAM when they are cut on ultrasonic frequencies. Plants release chemicals to warn the ants that live inside them of the danger when they are harmed. Plants communicate through connected root systems and fungal messengers. But because vegans can't hear it, it's morally okay to eat a plant, but not a chicken, because the vegan can empathize with a chicken but not a plant. Much less the microscopic organisms that live on the plant.
The destruction of environments and populations to sustain monocultures. Yes. Beans like soy and lentils are able to sustain vegans. And in order to sustain a vegan population we need MASSIVE QUANTITIES of them in vast monocultures of plantations which result in communities being priced out of local staples because shipping it to America yields more profit. Add in the potential for global supply collapse due to the spread of hypereffective fungus or other crop-destroying disease...
The people who literally cannot survive on a Vegan diet. Whether due to genetics or later acquired traits, there are folks all over the world who are unable to sustain themselves on a vegan diet. People with Crohn's, for example, often have to avoid foods with high insoluble fiber content and the best possible proteins they can consume are fish or chicken in order to avoid malnutrition.
When someone tells me they're a Vegetarian I go "Oh, okay." and in my mind I know this person doesn't eat meat. Maybe because of dietary restrictions, religious tenets, moral identity, or simple preference.
When someone tells me they're a Vegan I go "Oh, okay." and in my mind I know this person considers themself to be morally superior to me because for them it is an explicit moral position and I exist in a state they consider immoral.
Veganism, by its very structure, is designed around in-group out-group boundary generation with the Morally Superior Vegan in group and the Morally Inferior Meat-Eater out group.
And they hold themselves in that state due to their own ignorance. Because plants do not communicate to us their pain in a way they can personally hear and understand it is okay to eat -that- living thing, but not one that can moo or quack or oink. Because the vegan can hear the moo, the quack, the oink.
Trying to build morality around the consumption of nutrients is, at best, a fool's game based on assumptions and nothing more. And I hate it, deeply.
Once we get to spontaneous generation of nutrient-rich material with no exploitation of labor and poor people, or death of living things, -then- we can get morally superior about consumption. Everything prior to that is just moral masturbation.
Hey! Put this on my vegan blog to address these questions/concerns.
1: I get that, and considering the life of living things is something I always try to do. It can be worthwhile to consider the ways in which we harm all living beings, not just animals. In fact, Buddhist thought has a lot to say about this, and is a tradition with a long veg history - far longer than any in an english speaking country. However, contemplation on the suffering of the bugs we step on aside, we have to eat. Ultimately, if your concern is for the wellbeing of plants and animals, the answer is harm reduction: how do you consume where the least beings are harmed?
If you look into how plants and animals are used for consumption, reducing animal products is by and large more efficient. We grow mountains of corn and soy, mostly to feed animals. This is a waste of both plant life and human life. If most people were to go vegan, than a lot of the land currently being torn up for both animal agriculture and the monocultures that feed them could be rewilded, benefiting the ecosystem in huge, tangible ways.
Veganism isn't simply a concern for just animals. It's trying to reduce the harm we do.
2: I mentioned this in the previous part, but most of the soy we grow is not for people. The US soybean board's report from the '24/'25 states that ~6 million metric tons of soybeans were used in human food total, most of that for soybean oil. Compare that to the amount used in animal feed: 35.8 million metric tons, about 96.5% of all soybeans used. This is not even accounting for eating the soybeans as their own food or in tofu, tempeh, ect. This falls under "other edible products", and only accounts for 0.4 million metric tons.
3: Yeah, some people can't go vegan. Some people could, but it would be exceptionally hard. This is true. However, most people are not in this camp. Most people can go vegan. They do not want to.
And as a note about the morality aspect, I think a lot of people get very self conscious when someone is taking a moral stance they do not take. I will acknowledge that people on the internet are inherently more inflammatory, this is the nature of the medium. However, calling it "moral masturbation" and saying things like "Trying to build morality around the consumption of nutrients is, at best, a fool's game based on assumptions and nothing more." downplays the actual ability for people to enact change. How, perchance, do you think we will get to "spontaneous generation of nutrient-rich material with no exploitation of labor and poor people, or death of living things"? Who will try to find these technologies, these solutions? Will it be the people who claim that there is nothing to do, so they might as well continue with the (admittedly!) unethical behaviors they inherited? Or will it be the people who are fighting to make consumption more ethical, day by day?
Just to respond to this whole "plants SCREAM when they are cut" thing, this has to be one of the most widely misrepresented facets of biology and one of the most inappropriately applied half-truths I can think of. I'm sorry for the incoming rant but I am sick of being asked to take this idea seriously, as if it isn't just a complete fabrication of what the current research actually tells us. I don't think that the people putting forward this argument take it seriously themselves.
To start with, plants do indeed emit ultrasonic sounds when they are under stress, such as when they are dehydrated or physically damaged. These sounds resemble popping or clicking noises and occur at frequencies that are inaudible to humans, but not to many animals. These are sounds that are the result of a physical process, for example with dehydration, air bubbles form and collapse in the stems of the plant, creating vibrations that result in these ultrasonic noises. These noises are what we mean when we talk about plants "screaming."
Screams in plants are highly unlikely to be the expression of a subjective experience. This is simply a misunderstanding of what scientists mean when they talk about plants "screaming," and honestly, is more often than not the result of reading the clickbait headline but not the study itself... We can't know any of this for certain of course, just as I can't know for sure that you experience pain, but none of the available evidence even implies the existence of subjective experiences in any organism that does not have a central nervous system or a brain.
Compare that physiological response to a stressor, with a scream in an animal. A scream for an animal is a way to alert others of distress, it is indeed likely that plant "screams" function in the same way. They key difference is that in animals, a scream reflects a subjective experience, which is the state of being scared, shocked or in pain. The scream of an animal is not simply an automatic response to a physical process, it is the expression of a subjective experience. Suffering is the morally relevant factor, not relatability, and not empathy.
Plants are complex organisms, and can respond to their external environment in relatively sophisticated ways. Through our recent discovery of what we call "The Wood Wide Web," we understand better the extent to which they can communicate and even share resources with one another, However, we have no compelling evidence whatsoever that plants experience anything even resembling the pain we observe in animals.
I am not aware of any respected botanist who takes seriously the idea that plants feel pain, or a peer reviewed study which demonstrates or even suggests that they do. Plants not only lack a central nervous system or pain receptors, they don't even have nerve ganglia. More fundamentally, plants lack the brain that is necessary to process those signals into a pain sensation, even if those signals did exist. Plants lack all of the biological apparatus we believe is required to experience pain, or any subjective experience of sensation at all. That plants emit sounds and chemical signals is utterly irrelevant to the question of whether or not they are capable of subjective experience.
You can disagree with me on philosophical or spiritual grounds, and it is completely fine if you do. That said, it is dishonest to pretend that this conclusion is based on the current landscape of scientific knowledge, or that this is anything other than an unsubstantiated belief. Nothing we know about plants suggests that suffering, or subjective experience of any kind is possible for them, and there is an overwhelming scientific consensus on that.
The implication that the physiological response to stressors is somehow morally comparable to animals who we know suffer at our hands, is not just inaccurate, it is morally repugnant. I use that term seriously. I find it genuinely revolting to be asked to take seriously the comparison between the suffering of a pig in a factory farm and the chemical response of a sunflower getting their leaf cut. I think that this rhetoric is cynical in the extreme.
This is not an attempt to centre the experiences of plants or to encourage people to value them more. If it was, you’d be encouraging people to eat less meat, since farmed ruminants take in far more calories in crops than they will ever produce in meat, meaning that most meat eating diets require more plants to sustain than a vegan’s does, to say nothing of the vast swathes of formerly forested land now used for grazing. This is less about valuing plants and more about devaluing the pain of non-human animals and put it on the same level as an automatic physiological response in a non-sentient being.
Slitting a pig's throat and picking a strawberry are not morally comparable, and realistically, I think you already know that. I do not believe you are out there in the world behaving as if you believe that every plant you touch, stand on or eat is experiencing pain. I think that this is something you only talk or even think about when you’re arguing with a vegan. To imply that you think that electrocuting a chicken and picking weeds are morally comparable is engaging in mental gymnastics in a deliberate attempt to obscure the issue.
In short, the morally relevant issue is subjective experience, not simply "living matter," or the fact that plants are not "relatable." To pretend that this is why vegans eat plants but not animals, as if there were no other morally relevant difference, is either wildly ignorant of what vegans believe and what the current research actually says, or it is an intentional misrepresentation of both.
(Predictably, this response earned me a block...)

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it really is crazy how quickly people were willing to just let chatgpt do everything for them. i have never even tried it. brother i don't even know if it's just a website you go to or what. i do not know where chatgpt actually lives, because i can decide my own grocery list.
"We need to challenge the hierarchy in our own lives, and begin living in a way that promotes mutuality. If we take this point seriously, it only makes sense that we begin systematically examining and extirpating hierarchical thinking and actions from our lives. Only in this way, will we begin to reconceptualize our relations with each other and with the natural world as complementary rather than dominant and conquering."
-Bob Torres in Making a Killing