sugar sweet venom

I am doing it. I am fighting my brain and its shitty attention and memory issues to CATCH UP WITH THIS COMIC'S ARCHIVE after years of trying and then fucking forgetting where I left off.

Oh goodness it's so good I love it so much.

Hi please read A Ghost Story if you are into disastrously human protagonists getting into deep paranormal trouble.

Taking in a lot of the themes about creation in deltarune and thinking about Pink in chapter 5 had me thinking about her cousin and how he’d want to get in on making his dream come true as well (who wouldn’t?). It would be nice if MTT and Tenna could come to Castletown with Pink in chapter 6, but we’ll just have to wait and see.

I puzzled over drawing Pink as another ghost in the early part of the comic since ghosts in utdr lore dubiously can’t un-possess a vessel once they’ve chosen/bonded with it, and post-ch5, she’s possessing Asgore’s Mew Mew figurine, BUT for the sake of emoting/gesturing and showing her and MTT coming from the same place, I just had her as her ghost form. One last “HEY GUYS IM MOVING. GONNA GO LIVE AS MY REAL SELF BYE” before she’s gone. Gotta get her goodies, you know? And take her depressed cousin with her.

When MTT and Ralsei meet in the comic, I had Ralsei ask his name and pronouns, not only because it’s a first introduction and Ralsei is polite like that, but because he’s sensitive to the emotions of the Lightners. I also just like to see this greeting expressed in media because it should be so normal and natural, but with certain people in my life (even not explicitly anti-trans people) it turns a conversation tense or awkward. There’s nothing weird or wrong with asking someone’s preferred name and pronouns! And as a trans person, it doesn’t feel awkward to receive the question if it’s out of genuine respect and curiosity to get to know me. In fact, (like MTT in the comic) I’d be pleased to be extended that question in an introductory conversation. It’s no big deal to answer, just like answering “what’s your name?” Or “what are your hobbies?” It’s just another part of me, my gender identity. Nothing to be afraid of!

As for trans Ralsei, I see that trans coding within that goat… I don’t know what his gender identity is (since it seems even Ralsei has not figured that out about himself yet), but it’s there. Maybe we’ll see him explore more about himself, what he likes, who he feels he needs to be, and who he wants to be. And maybe Ralsei will realize she’s a girl or that they’re nonbinary (my personal headcanon leans Ralsei demigender—demigirl, demiboy, idk. But some kind of in-between) But that’s for Ralsei to figure out! I can only speculate… Whatever happens next for Ralsei, I hope he comes to love himself as an individual.

And Spamton. He enters the comic since he also has ties to MTT, but like with the rest of his life, he’s excluded, and worse, defeated by the reality of his world. It’s fiction, all of it. You might be able to draw the perfect you, might be able to imagine a body that would perfectly align with who you really are, but it’s all imaginary. An image. A dream. He’s trans despair (at least in this comic) for that discrepancy between body and mind that will always remain in some degree. His despair is the same as Mettaton’s despair, who narrates alongside Spamton’s visuals. They’re in unison there because they’ve both experienced the same feeling, only now with the help, care, support, and love of his community, Mettaton is able to feel more like himself—the true him through creation. It might be an imaginary Dark World, but it came to life with the love they all share, with the excitement they bring together to see Mettaton’s dream come to reality. When he leaves Castletown, he might just be a drawing of a fancy body, and Pink may just be a figure of a catgirl, but everyone they love helped them feel more themselves than they have their entire lives. And that made their real selves a reality.

And THAT’s why you share the pen with Spamton. He may be little and weird, you may not know him very well, but wouldn’t you have wanted that olive branch extended to you? Wouldn’t you have wanted someone to hand you the pen and tell you “I see you.”

this video was from pep’s first birthday 12 years ago (2014)! and here is a recent video from the last few months on their YouTube channel which still updates regularly: