perfect immortal cell

woke deadbeat father: i'm just going to get some oat milk

theoretically it should b possible 2 do smth in between oversharing and not telling somebody Anything but this is simply not possible. scientists told me so. u can only do those

MY biggest fear as an artist: thunderstorms. thunder loud and scary

interview with the masquerade

vampire: the vampire

My disguise fucking sucks and i am going to get killed

there’s just something so awesome about a character you love getting really badly hurt

I was born with the dragon soul. you will not put me on hold

northernlion was reading out a sweet note his daughter wrote him in kindergarten that said "i know my dad loves me because he's my favorite person and i'm his favorite person" and someone commented "circular reasoning"

Youre a mollusk and something potentially bad or scary gets inside you what do you do. Make a pearl around it. Okay. okay

the problem with writing fantasy is that i have to constantly stop myself from having people say "jesus fucking christ." jesus didn't exist here dammit. i need a fake swear that means the same thing i think

Did I ever talk abt the time i was at a bdsm club and one of the pups was on all fours and barking and being cute and the dom on scene was like “hi puppy! Do you do any tricks?” And he said “I can beatbox!”

I was like. Doubled over incapacitated laughing the entire time. He was really good and a big sweetheart and I felt kinda bad but I couldn’t stop thinking “why the am I getting the beatboxing puppy unskippable cutscene at the bdsm club”