I was browsing aimlessly the indescribable Temu website, a couple of days ago, looking for the predictable kitschy expressions of the OL paraphernalia, part of which usually cost an arm and a leg at any given fan event stand.
As expected, there is a deluge of S pics and Sassenach declinations, on any given material one could think of and for any given activity one could think of. From sleeping in Mackenzie tartaned polyester sheets, to drinking from JAMMF cups, to cooking in one of those questionable JAMMF aprons Lasagna Lady once made famous across the fandom, Temu got you covered.
However, I was not expecting this particular product assortment, which immediately made me stop in my tracks:
A Sassenach Spirits wall tapestry (LOL?), priced between 6 and 16 euros, according to size.
A flannel (a girl can dream, this being Temu, after all) 'high quality Sassenach Spirits blanket', priced between 7 and 10 euros.
A 'soft and durable' polyester 'Sassenach Spirits kitchen towel', pretty steeply priced, at 5.25 euros apiece.
A Chinese (hungry) ghost who is, however, able to deliver to Bucharest.
I wonder what the hell SS's marketing and legal teams are busying themselves with, on a daily basis, and I am very serious. These are clearly cheap, low quality, pirated derivate products of their brand. The very fact they are cheap, low quality, pirated and available on a Chinese sales hub of questionable repute is very toxic and damaging to SS's brand storytelling and product benchmark. For obvious reasons, like this cruel farce being at complete odds with the entire personal passion project and high-level crafting concepts, that define Sassenach Spirits for its potential target clientele and markets.
To be honest, this is not the entry I had imagined for them, as far as the Asian market is concerned.
And yes, I cannot unsee the irony of a brand still in legal crosshairs over trademark issues being shamelessly stolen by petty, anonymous Chinese scammers. Who clearly try to make a quick buck out of the Mommies' perpetual adoration.
But fear not. If we are to believe the OG troll's threats, their legal team seems more concerned about what is being currently discussed on Tumblr. And soon enough, I predict Norouzi will show off another motorbike, at that July ride or die event.
To paraphrase Alpahville's old and corny one trick pony summer hit - 🎵China can wait, they're only watching the skies.🎵 Due diligence was never their forte, was it?
Ended by choosing their other half-forgettable hit. Seemed more appropriate:
turnnoffyourmind
yousharknotpass
dededos
andulkaphoto
origamiaround
