i’ve been so well-behaved i deserve to light things on fire now

advertising lemonade is pointless. the human body already knows it needs it

i have tested positive for tzatziki

going on a guilt trip do yall want anything

if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask

its not only normal to cry at work its a requirement. you can get a promotion on the basis of crying and sobbing even

your cat was an honor to see in the window

it’s okay if your future goals are like “still be alive then” and “find happiness” and “have a will to live”

croissant seeking behavior

there is always some fucking laundry and dust and some other shit

im going to fix my entire life

When?

Like Um. later

you have to listen to loud music . it scares the evil creatures from your head

i love people so much that im trying to be one myself. its a bit crazy, i know…

i chose to sever my connection with the divine by drinking diet coke