literally so silly dumb why i am even still thinking about them

Love Begins
trying on a metaphor
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
NASA

if i look back, i am lost

#extradirty
Monterey Bay Aquarium

Origami Around

ellievsbear
Show & Tell
EXPECTATIONS

shark vs the universe
official daine visual archive

Jules of Nature

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@inhaletherain
literally so silly dumb why i am even still thinking about them

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“why do you like xyz” pervert reasons, next question
Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable
does the bus know that i have raw chicken in my bag
holy shit have you evver tried this new substance called album in order

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my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!
“Imma destroy that pussy” my friend 😔
“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat
comedians can only dream of writing something this funny
It is imperative that the customer remain unaware that employees drink water, it frightens and scares them to think of an employee as having human needs
pros of being on testosterone: my kermit impression is getting better
cons of being on testosterone: my Mort from Madagascar impression is getting worse
peace and love on planet fucking earth
So I've got this friend whose nervous because she's trans and dating this guy who she hasn't told yet because they've only been on a two dates. For this story let's call the friend Jane and the guy she was dating Jason. Happy ending don't worry.
So I tell Jane to bring her boy over to a bbq I'm having and she can tell him she's trans at my place surrounded by queer and trans people who love her and will support her if he ends up being awful.
She waits till the end of the bbq to tell him the news, by which point the rest of us have learned that Jason is a kind, friendly, empathetic, hard working, dummy. So we sit down, all of us a little worried about this gym bro's reaction when she tells him she's trans, and that she understands if he doesn't want to keep dating her it's no big deal.
He's baffled, so we explain what trans is, and after the disclosure that she hasn't had bottom surgery yet...
"Oh you have a dick?"
"... yeah."
He look's around at the room full of people with baited breath, his clearly a little afraid girl friend says
"Oooohhhh! I get it! You think- don't worry Babe! Watch this!"
And ya'll this man jumps up, runs into the kitchen and returns with one of the bratwurst we had for grilling and proceeds to tilt his head back, put it down his throat, hold it in his mouth for a moment, and spit it up without even a whisper of a gag and then looks around at the group absolutely beaming with pride.
My mans saw his worried girlfriend and her support network and thought to him self "Oh they don't think I can't please my girl, but I'll show them!"
I do feel the need to add that later he excitedly tell the group that as a straight guy, he never thought that skill would be useful outside hotdog eating contests.
"Man its too bad that im straight since I've got like no gag reflex and all."
"Honey, I must tell you, i am in fact trans and I have not had bottom surgery."
"My god... everything's coming up Jason."
Pure of heart dumb of ass hetero of sexual

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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You have to careful about masturbating to your imagination cause god doesn’t know about imagination so he will assume you are jacking off to whatever is around you like dust, a dead bug, birds nest. And if you jerk off to a poisonous bug (or if god assumes you have) then you do go to hell
it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible
and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring
just ate an orange… no scurvy for me thank you… #NoScurvy
having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
ai fucking sucks i miss when everything was cake