the whole citrus universe

me after a minor inconvenience: i hope i get hit by a [remembers i’m anti car-centric infrastructure] pedestrian

I love asking friends, without context, "what are you really into this week?" I'll go first. this week I'm really into mouthwash and sudoku. Last week I was into peaches.

we used to be a society on here!! reblog, don't like! I want to hear what you're into!!! I'm literally looking into the nyt game Pips!!!

someone said it's also a cautionary tale about mistreating your wife and I think that's spot on especially for other related types of stories e.g. the crane wife. like I think these stories are very much Husband Anxiety Stories. the Woman-Creatures are black boxes whose interior experience it is impossible to know and who have strange and often seemingly arbitrary rules that you must follow or else they will disappear. idk. like. that's why I think that any empowering-to-women-ness qualities of these stories is incidental. I think they're externalized anxiety about coercive societal heterosexuality and the inability to truly Know one's wife in such circumstances.

was waiting on an emergency plumber, decided to smoke by my car instead of stare at my fucked up kitchen. he pulled up next to me, leaned out the window and goes "i'm assuming you're the client" like yeah buddy, read that one right

honorary best friend, mike the plumber, has saved the day. "don't worry, i've got pvc couplings you've probably never even seen before." brother, i wasn't aware that was something i could worry about

sorry im not giving into the cutting out sweet treats propaganda. life is hard enough

whoever writes the nyt connections categories is experiencing joan of arc type visions & hallucinations

Has anyone noticed that translating poetry is not easy

It's kind of like if you were in unrequited love with the crossword puzzle

*wearing an intricate and tacky necklace made of plastic dinosaurs and mismatched beads and a T-Shirt that says "I STEAL TRINKETS FROM THE TREASURE CHEST WHEN THE DENTIST ISN'T LOOKING"*

miss taking an uquiz every time i opened the tumblr app… it was an era i took for granted

I don't know whether any of you guys have looked outside lately but it's leaves as hell out there