Random fact vending machine

when you’re telling someone that you were on the wikipedia page for defunct US retail outlets and they’re like “why” and you suddenly realize that this is not someone you can successfully communicate with

you have permission to pick that 2 year old "abandoned" project back up. it's not mad at you for setting it aside. and maybe time and distance have helped ease or erase the things that made you put it down in the first place.

here, have one 🥦

or... 🥕

“Are you a green flag?” “Are you a red flag?” bitch im a white flag 🏳️ i GIVE UP

Illustrated break-downs of how common objects work. Currently featuring a mechanical pencil, PEZ dispenser, retractable pen, and Zippo lighter.

I don't care if we're mutals, I WILL be scared to talk to you

Alarm Off perfec t time for put lying in bed to t/hink! Inside very Quiet and Peace thoughts very productive put in Alarm Off. Put Thinking in Alarm Off time. no problems ever lying in bedd with alarm off because good Contemplation and Eyes Closed for difficult deep thoughts about day. alarmOff yes safe place to close eyes lie in bed can trust not to fall back asleep. friend bed

no weapon formed against my sweeties will prosper

when a moot changes their pfp i feel like a baby whose dad shaved his beard

Use your PTO

the fact is that while it is true that in “a muppet christmas carol” kermit and piggy’s characters’ children are green boy frogs and pink girl pigs, like their parents, in “muppets take manhattan” it is made explicitly clear that piggy’s ideal concept of their children is pink frogs and green pigs

"incurious" still GOAT insult. You could be better but you're not. You could learn but you won't, and for no good reason, just a base dispositional apathy. Get fucked