playa vista scares me
Xuebing Du
Peter Solarz
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

@theartofmadeline
KIROKAZE
🪼

blake kathryn
almost home
styofa doing anything

pixel skylines

Kiana Khansmith
Claire Keane

Love Begins
hello vonnie
Misplaced Lens Cap
we're not kids anymore.

shark vs the universe

Monterey Bay Aquarium
trying on a metaphor

seen from Malaysia
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seen from Hungary
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seen from Singapore

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@hellofapotato
playa vista scares me

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what if we all explode
This very production of Orpheus & Eurydice is now available to stream, free, for the month of June.
i think avoidance is such a little-recognized ocd compulsion. all the time i talk to people with ocd who are like "i was always having intrusive thoughts about using kitchen knives and harming myself or others but i'm okay now because i just stopped using knives ever 👍 so i'm good now"
and i'm like unfortunately i have bad news.
if you don't know why this doesn't work, the issue is that ocd never stops when you implement a compulsion. it evolves. today you've "solved" it by never using a knife again (and losing access to an important cooking tool, thus limiting an aspect of your life) but in a few months or a year it'll be that forks are dangerous too. and hey, isn't it risky to use the stove? avoidance will even begin to manifest in places you might not recognize.
the point is that OCD compulsions are never solutions, they're actually the problems. the intrusive thoughts SEEM like the problem and the compulsions FEEL like the solution. and that's how it getsya.
I recently remembered that I was a presenter at the first ever transgender philosophy conference, the Trans Experience in Philosophy conference sponsored by Hypatia: A Journal of Feminist Philosophy, in 2016.
Found my writing for that and it still holds up. I’ll caveat it by saying 1) this is specific to the Americas context (not just North, Maria Lugones is a South American feminist) 2) this is not rejecting feminism or women’s liberation but rather the female sexed subject as the basis for feminism:
My goal is to rethink transgender politics by placing it within the context of colonization. ‘Queer’ decolonization studies focuses on the colonial erasure of pre-colonial gendering and sexuality, with some arguing a non-existent pre-colonial gendering and sexuality within some contexts. In taking these critiques seriously we must ask the question of what transgender and feminist politics within colonized spaces means with an understanding of these politics as developing from a eurocentric framework.
To do this we must place Judith Butler and Monique Wittig in conversation with the tradition of Black and Indigenous Feminisms to better understand the role race plays in the construction of gender. A common Black Feminist critique of the Radical Feminist movement in addition to other Feminisms, is the unspoken assumption of the white sexually dimorphic body as universal female experience. Wittig spoke of the biological model for sex as part of the legacy of patriarchy naturalizing the social divisions between men and women when used by both gender science and feminism. The Combahee River Collective made a similar claim against radical feminism, coming from a racial lens, to describe biological essentialism as racialized and why they rejected it from the perspective of often not being considered to be ‘real women.’
We know from Judith Butler that there is no pre-discursive body, that to describe a body before discourse is to discursively construct it, and because of this biological sex is always already gender; the move towards essentializing sex is to discursively construct a category as pre-existing discourse. Gender is always already heterosexual, the symbolic categories of ‘man’ and ‘woman’ existing to naturalize divisions that exist to propagate itself through reproductive futurism that produces the gendered subject. But these gendered subjects, the assumption of universal whiteness by excluding the narrative of race from its conception, was always already racialized. Gender is a white nationalist politics that associates the purity of the nation with the reproduction of the white race and its subjects. This is a departure from the framework that there is a universal female experience based in the naturalism of sex. Instead, Maria Lugones’s framework of the Coloniality of Gender, or gender as part of the European colonization of the Americas and Africa is where we’ll base an analysis of gender from.
The Coloniality of Gender describes the arising Enlightenment project of scientific naturalism replacing the theological basis for race. In this process, scientific naturalism seeks to explain previous theological justifications for race within biological terms - naturalizing social divisions within the pre-discursive. Maria Lugones argues that gender is part of this process within Enlightenment thought.The biologizing of gender cannot be separated from the biologizing of race. The Coloniality of Gender describes the supposed universal dimorphic sexed body as white. By placing attention to the context where Black and Indigenous Feminists were describing their gendered experiences as racialized - that their womanhood is not a universal assumption but a contested space we can rethink gender politics as a racial politics. Coexisting with the assumption of the white sexed body as the universal female experience is the assumption of Blackness and Indigeneity as outside the symbolic integrity of gendered categories. The Coloniality of Gender is seen in the colonial encounter - the meeting space of the colonizer’s eurocentrism with the colonized subject. Maria Lugones describes this colonial encounter as not carrying forward the notion of a universal sexually dimorphic body. The colonial encounter instead produces racial subjects within what Lugones terms the ‘light’ and ‘dark’ side of gender. The dark side of gender is seen in the colonial literature describing Black and Indigenous persons as non-normatively sexed, as intersexed, disfigured, mutilated, excessive, as not dimorphic but rather masculine and feminine in ways unintelligible in the face of the model of sexual dimorphism as white.
Hortense Spillers further problematizes the notion of a universal white sexed body by arguing that the violence of the Middle Passage and enslavement is an ungendering violence, and making visible that violence into the flesh. Her distinction between body and flesh is essential to an understanding of gender as racialized. Black Flesh being ungendered further proves the white sexed body is not universal. Black persons existing outside of the Enlightenment Humanist discourses shows us that the body belongs to the human while Black Flesh does not belong to the human. The flesh can never be part of the light side of gender, as dimorphic or heterosexual.This historical narrative of gender as racialized confirms much of what Black and Indigenous Feminism have already described starting with “Ain’t I A Woman?” Gender politics being based within accepting the narrative of the Coloniality of Gender answers this question for us: No. Sex is the naturalization of white supremacist racial politics, not existing within the body before discourse, and sex relying on the separation between the liberated subject position of the body versus the ungendering of the captured flesh.
The implications this has for a transgender and feminist politics is immense. Returning to Butler, we know that in Gender Trouble she described that feminism produces the very subject it claims to be representing - the female subject. If we recognize the female, sex as always already gender then it becomes necessary as part of a decolonization effort to reject the female as the basis of feminism. If biological sex and thus the female arises from a context of colonization and slavery, then we can come to the conclusion that gender essentialism that places transgender people as outside can only exist because of colonization. Transmisogyny and the antiblack violence against Black Trans Women and colonial violence against transgender indigenous women is a direct consequence of the biologizing of sex and race. The essentialist politics of Radical Feminism, based within the female subject as a revolutionary subject, is therefore a racial nationalism. Cissexism and transmisogyny are therefore racialized in its formation. There cannot be a female subject without the white sexed body. The main purpose of feminism as the liberation of women as a sexed-gendered category, which has been exclusionary in both racial and trans contexts, cannot be a truly liberatory gender politics.
the reason that learning to speak dog helped me learn to speak human is that I was able to translate verbal communication into dog and back. by which I mean, I was able to interpret things like "this is intended to deescalate the situation" "this is an appeasement signal" but also in that I was able to translate what signal I wanted to send INTO Human Word Language. this is a situation that I want to deescalate. what do I say to indicate that? this is a person who I think may feel threatened by me. I want to let them know I'm not going to do or say the thing they're scared of. what do I say to indicate that? this person is trying to push my boundaries and get a reaction out of me. I want to let them know that I won't be rising to the bait, but without starting a fight. what do I say to indicate that? a friend is apprehensive about something I have experience with and I want to help them understand that it's safe. what do I say to indicate that? etc etc on and on it just made everything SO MUCH EASIER for me
that really blew my mind wide open

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'Transfem DIY HRT' and 'Transmasc DIY HRT' are a pair of zines aimed at teaching transgender people how to safely self-administer DIY Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT).
Both zines are 100% free to download here from Little Mouse (who also made the zine). Print, share and distribute to those who need it!
The information contained in this zine is collated from, and openly available from, DIYHRT.info.
Remember to brush and floss, you're worth the effort, and it matters more than you may think!
X and as always, a half ass is better than no ass!
Hundreds gathered in San Francisco’s Chinatown as city leaders and community members celebrated the opening of the world’s first Chinese LGB
Hundreds gathered in San Francisco’s Chinatown as city leaders and community members celebrated the opening of the world’s first Chinese LGBTQ museum. Mayor Daniel Lurie joined supporters for the ribbon-cutting ceremony at the OUT Museum, a space dedicated to preserving and sharing Chinese queer history and culture. The museum was founded by Chinese artist and LGBTQ advocate Xiangqi Chen, who spent more than 20 years promoting queer visibility in China before moving to the United States in 2023.
June 5, 2026
an amv of just machines and cute girls from 80s/90s anime, set to fun music
(youtube link)
ive been trying to make a princess tutu au/crossover work for a loooooong time. most of these were drawn last year, there were other things i wanted to include but i ran out of steam. thought it was about time i shared it anyway though!

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my favorite amv for the last like 15?? years has been a princess tutu one "hold me now/hall om mig" uploaded by komichi. the need to recreate it with deltarune is so strong.
would you believe that video is nearing its 20th birthday? and it's still one of the most well-timed amvs ive ever seen! i know it's been directly responsible for a LOT of ptutu's viewership, myself included. it kind of works as a perfect trailer (technically showing tons of spoilers but not giving enough context or time to dwell on them unless you know whats going on already), and it's also a major inspiration for what i try to achieve as an amv editor myself. my ideal is to do exactly what this amv did, be entertaining and engaging even for viewers who havent seen the source material and hopefully encourage interest in it as well.
i love ur robot girl cure so much. i love that 13 has this one sided relationship with her because she keeps seeing the ghost of someone and superimposing it onto cure. what does cure even do? medicine still?
yup, and she's very proud of it
house study
Console buttons from Star Trek: The Original Series (1966-69)
yummy snack?

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Posting something very not horny: My hysterectomy and HRT zine
A short zine about hysterectomies and HRT.
Do you want bottom surgery in the future? Want to make sure you can't have babies? Masculinize a bit faster? Just curious about HRT after a hysterectomy? Do I have the zine for you! This zine is based on my own personal experience and up to date medical research.
Free to download, but if you're feeling generous, buy me a shot of Soju.
A lot of criticism of delivery apps focuses on the fact that they offer convenience and variety, which I find much less compelling than criticizing the fact that the apps often send their contractors on fetch quests from Hell.
There are real labor problems here. Base pay is often insulting. Customer tips carry too much of the burden. Workers need better protections, more transparent algorithms, protection from arbitrary deactivation, and actual recourse when the app or a customer screws them over. Car-dependent delivery is also an environmental and infrastructural problem, though in a denser city I’d still be doing this work; I’d just be doing it by bike.
But when people talk about delivery work, I rarely see them talk to actual delivery workers. I see a lot of abstract arguments about convenience, consumer decadence, “hustle culture,” and internalized neoliberalism. Meanwhile, when I’m out working and waiting in restaurants for orders, the other Dashers I meet are usually people who only speak Spanish, people who read as neurodivergent, visibly physically disabled people, or some combination of the above.
I have not met this mythical Disco Elysium poor ultraliberal hustlegrinder-wannabe people seem to be arguing with. Maybe that archetype exists somewhere. If it exists among any kind of gig worker, it would probably be rideshare drivers. But most of what I see looks less like “rise and grind” and more like “this is one of the few forms of work available to people who need flexibility, low barriers to entry, limited managerial surveillance, or a way to work around language barriers, disability, burnout, chronic illnesses and injuries with symptoms that come and go unpredictably, caregiving, résumé gaps, or discrimination.”
That does not make the current system good. It means the current system is filling a real gap that a lot of supposedly better systems do not even acknowledge.
As a disabled person who is burnout-prone and demand-sensitive, contracting as a delivery driver has given me an unprecedented level of financial flexibility. I can work when I have capacity. I can stop when I’m deteriorating. I can build my day around my actual body instead of being trapped under a manager who thinks “reliable” means “able to perform the same way every day no matter what.” That matters. It does not cancel out the exploitation, but it is also not fake just because it is politically inconvenient.
And delivery itself is not some inherently decadent evil. Sometimes people live alone. Sometimes they are sick. Sometimes they are disabled, exhausted, overwhelmed, grieving, overloaded, or recovering from something else - perhaps the stress and fatigue induced by their own job. Sometimes they need medicine, groceries, or a meal that will actually unplug their sinuses instead of whatever generic community-care slop someone thinks they should be grateful for. Humans are allowed to need specificity. “Food” is not the same as “the food I can actually eat right now.”
A serious labor critique would ask how to make delivery work safer, better-paid, less tip-dependent, less car-dependent, less algorithmically punitive, and less precarious. It would ask what kinds of flexible, accessible work should exist for people who cannot thrive in conventional employment. It would ask how cities could support bike delivery, worker cooperatives, public infrastructure, and real protections without simply replacing one bad system with a moral sermon about how nobody should ever want takeout.
But a lot of the discourse does not do that. It treats convenience itself as suspicious. It treats wanting flexible work as false consciousness. It treats the needs of disabled people, immigrants, and other people who can't fit into traditional employment structures as details to be swept aside in favor of a cleaner political image.
I guess the opinions of delivery workers only count when they are politically convenient.