Bread & Circus

how come you only become aware of how tipsy you are in bathrooms

People often say they hope their deceased pet dog is chasing squirrels in doggy heaven… what did all of those squirrels do to deserve an afterlife of torment?

Dog heaven is also squirrel hell it’s a very efficient system.

i can’t stop fucking laughing at the thought of squirrels sinning so much in the mortal plane that they have to be sent to squirrel hell to atone

They know that the bird feeder isn’t meant for them

stop using chatgpt!!!! take a bronze pin and carve your questions onto an ox scapula, then toss it into the fire!!!! use the cracks to divine the gods answer!!!!

citations still have to be APA 7th edition though. if you plagiarise, the gods will flood the yellow river again. and you'll lose your academic standing.

I endorse this post!

put on my leitmotif bro i feel a monologue coming on

sorry about not replying I think I’ve gone missing

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

“bend over” “bend what? over”

I hate this place

Sometimes it’s possible to have too much determination.

I was waiting for the payoff and I was NOT disappointed

(guy who is wearing all yellow voice) Boy i sure hope no one looks at me in a noticeable way

How's Curious George doing btw

hey. That was devastating

meet me under the pier we are going beast mode

my human vaporizing machine continues to mistify people