toushindai / 30s / she/her. A known bisexual. Sometimes I pretend to be serious but mostly I just fandom. Currently: Hades II mostly, watch out for spoilers
A known bisexual. Administrative coordinator by day. Writer also by day. Asleep by night, unless something’s gone terribly wrong. Autistic, at all hours.
My special interests take the form of serial fandom obsessions. It’s basically Hades II right now? With some occasional bursts of TOTK. If you followed me for (counts backwards on fingers) Tears of the Kingdom, Hades, Transistor, Baccano!, Soul Eater, or any other fandom I don’t post about anymore, sorry about that. I do not have any control over the direction of the special interest.
I write a lot of fanfiction, specializing--I may as well cop to this, I think it's been the case since I was in college--in what we'll call eroticized power dynamics. You can find me on AO3. That and tumblr are my only social medias presently, on account of the horrors.
Below the cut, I'd like to highlight a few of the fics or fic series that I'm proudest of for each fandom.
Tears of the Kingdom
Questions of Kingship: Two PWP one-shots followed by a multichapter plotted work. Elements of dubcon and noncon throughout. Recommended if you like made-up politics, think TOTK maybe should have thought a little harder about the implications of its made-up politics, or just want to see two horrible men who hate each other fuck about it.
Following Ganondorf's oath of fealty to Hyrule, Rauru "invites" the Gerudo chief to stay at Hyrule Castle while Gerudo's subsumption into Hyrule is negotiated. It's a strategic action; Rauru does need to keep an eye on him. But his frustration with Ganondorf's false humility hides a desire that even he is not comfortable with, and Ganondorf has his own plans for the self-styled king of Hyrule.
Hades
Hello it is I a megzag main. reach out and grasp will be your best starting point. It focuses on Megaera's friendship with Thanatos and how it is affected by her (and Thanatos's) relationship with Zagreus. This series is available as a pay-what-you-want e-book at itch.io. From there, feel free to branch out; there is a lot of porn here and some things that are not porn. A further guide to my Hades fic can be found here.
Transistor
Not so much of the power dynamics in this fandom but I love Red/Boxer so much. I am not immune to a sword with a gentle voice. Here's the two of the on the verge of becoming a couple; here's what was as far as I can tell the first Red/Boxer smut on the entire internet even though I showed up three years late. Here is a post-game fic in which they finally must discuss the final act of the game.
Baccano!
Maskmaker trio my beloved. I've written over 100k across two separate "Monica is alive" AUs and my sole comfort is that I could never be as obsessed with this thought as Huey is.
Mad Religion is a one of my masterworks: set in the 2001 of an AU where Monica never died, Huey and Monica stumble upon a branch of SAMPLE only to discover that Elmer has already stumbled upon the cult on his own and is trying to make their sacrifice smile. Because that's what he's for--isn't it? If you like writing dealing with unnamed religious trauma, this one is for you.
Other than that--wow I cannot even begin to summarize my work in this fandom. Here's Ronny and Maiza getting to know each other in 1711. Here's Huey being the worst father imaginable to Liza. Here's a lil tone poem of Huey thinking on Monica and Elmer in the 1930s. Conversely here is Fermet leaning real hard on Huey's boundaries. There's more out there, my friends, but it's so scattered. I'm not even mentioning Ronny/Lucrezia here.
Soul Eater
Hello it is I a Medusa/Stein main. And also a "Stein's relationship with Lord Death/authority" main (I was working through some things at the time).
What it Means to Lose Control: When Stein has to give up control in order to fight, some are more than willing to step in and claim it from him. A Medusa/Stein divergent AU. I turned this into an e-book, with some side stories included; you can get that here (mobi | epub)
A God without an Ego: An examination of the relationship between Stein and Lord Death—where it works and where it falls apart. Looks like I never put this one on AO3... well, I'm not linking each piece individually on ff.n. The best way to read these ones is on e-book (mobi | epub)
Prior fandoms
If you want to go further back than "the tail end of my college years" godspeed and for god's sake please don't tell me about it. WallofIllusion on ff.n, you'll find some The World Ends With You, some Ace Attorney (original trio), some Death Note, and some Yu-Gi-Oh!. Also more Soul Eater than I transferred over to AO3.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
imperial radch fanship that has abilities unjustifiably beyond those possessed by canon characters, making it perfect, blameless, and universally lovable. call that a mercy sue
they don't tell you this but when an event is advertised as "for all ages" they mean kids. they mean kids. if you, a grown-up, show up expecting to do the arts'n'crafts, you're the weirdo. even though they said "all ages."
great news everynyan, the event that inspired me to make this post in anticipation had an art'n'craft that WAS in fact for all ages, including grown-ups. (in fact it was mosaic-making from recycled glass, with the tools to cut pieces down to size yourself if needed, so it was decidedly for people of a certain age.)
I understand 100% where you're coming from and I have a rant on what the organizers probably meant by "all ages". This is coming from spending too many years running public festivals for anywhere from 100 to 20,000 people at every size of venue from school cafeteria to national convention center, though of course there are exceptions.
The organizers almost certainly really did intend that anyone of any age was welcome to participate in the activities. The problem, I have found, seems to come in 2 parts: the audience's socio-cultural expectations and how they respond to peer pressure (real or imagined), and the likelihood of who shows up at certain kinds of events depending on the regional demographics and how the event is advertised.
My rambling below the cut:
Take this with a grain of salt but I find it interesting and have spent a decade in arguments about it, so. The (US) audience for many hands-on / interactive events that appeal to both kids and adults, based on all the marketing data I have personally collected or paid tens of thousands of dollars for from third-party agencies, basically says that women ages 30-45 are driving almost all the social media views. Many of those women are trying to plan educational and fun excursions for their children ages 2-13.
The problem comes when you, the adult who is actually invited to participate in said activities, comes to an event with a lot of families with children ages 2-13. People with social graces will say: "I need to let the children enjoy this; it is uncomfortable if I take a spot from a child. Also if I am a man or otherwise have some caution I might be worried that as a solo adult surrounded by kids I will be seen as suspicious." So they just watch from a distance and then usually go home. Which to me sucks because there's often nothing inherent about the activity that makes it enjoyable only to kids.
But too many events don't seem to be at the stage of understanding you need to signal in 1) the advertising and 2) the actual physical setup that both adults and kids are welcome, or need separate stations, or hours that are for certain age groups. I think this is why a lot of museums started doing adult nights, especially science museums. If you ever go to the Exploratorium in San Francisco, this will be abundantly clear: the museum is genuinely designed to be fascinating to anyone from a preschooler to a postdoc but unless there's space to allow for all and curated exhibit design with big and small tables, for example, it triggers the mental block of "let the kids have this".
Anyway I spent a decade of my life arguing two things:
Built the event so that both kids and adults have separate and mixed space and train the activity leaders how to welcome and engage the whole spectrum of participants.
Recognize that sometimes you actually do need to provide a separate interaction time or space to make the adults feel welcome, especially childless adults, or at least signage to make sure everyone understands that no, it's actually the point.
I usually work on events that have "low threshold, high ceiling" activities so your mileage may vary. (Meaning: anyone can try doing the thing, even at a very basic or shallow level; the ones who want to go deep focus or discussion about what's behind the activity will find the presenters are VERY capable of talking details or having a back-and-forth about it all day.)
I had a really fun time running an event at a big public television station's festival where just as many adults without kids accompanying them did the activity as kids did, and stayed for a full hour or more as it really was pure fun, and also sensory-friendly compared to much of the other activities. I also wore myself out trying to argue with co-event organizers over the years that hands-on stuff really does appeal to everybody BUT sit-down performances and lectures usually really do have age categories, and it can be a big waste of money to try to combine the two in one mega-event if you don't have ticket revenue or reservations to judge interest by in advance.
That said, I definitely find more events run by neurodivergent people or audiences try harder to be welcoming – especially if the presenters get to engage in their special interests with all kinds of people.
I could write an essay on online or hybrid event design as well, featuring such sections as "you need to ASSIGN SOMEONE TO TELL THE ONLINE PEOPLE WTF IS HAPPENING AND MAKE SURE THEY CAN SEE/HEAR" and "people's attention spans rarely exceed one hour, and even that is a lot when online". Gretchen McCulloch did a really fabulous blog post series during the pandemic about taking LingCon online only and what they learned about event design. If you enjoy gatherings as much as I do, I also highly recommend Priya Parker's book The Art of Gathering because she basically point blank says what vibes and outcomes are you trying to achieve, does the event model you believe you need actually achieve those things (whether it's a baby shower or a happy hour or a conference), and what do the attendees actually want that would make them happy to be part of it.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
they don't tell you this but when an event is advertised as "for all ages" they mean kids. they mean kids. if you, a grown-up, show up expecting to do the arts'n'crafts, you're the weirdo. even though they said "all ages."
great news everynyan, the event that inspired me to make this post in anticipation had an art'n'craft that WAS in fact for all ages, including grown-ups. (in fact it was mosaic-making from recycled glass, with the tools to cut pieces down to size yourself if needed, so it was decidedly for people of a certain age.)
Mercy of Divven One Divven Three and its captain, Soe Miraali. The fic I'm writing about them proceeds apace, so if you've enjoyed what I've written about them before, I hope you're looking forward to more! The summary (provisional):
As civil war rages in Radch space, Mercy of Divven gates abruptly out of Tstur Province of its own volition, and it is powerless to explain to its officers why it has set a course for Athoek. Though they've heard the rumors. Ship and crew alike must contend with the changing balance of autonomy and status amidst the isolation of gate-space travel.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
tragic: local woman really enjoyed writing self-contained backstory scenes but now must return to working on the longfic, which is in the state of "oh my god I'm never going to make all of this work together"
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming