here we eat avocados

more ppl need to get hooked on this drug called album in order. not enough people on album in order these days

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

Actually if you look at his username you’ll see he’s played at least one other game

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

shakespeare was so funny for that scene where the antagonist tells the protagonist “let the record show that i AM into women THAT BEING SAID holy shit, thou mars, seeing you here is like an even better version of my wedding night. like WAY better. i’ve been dreaming about you every night for years, and in my dreams we take off each other’s armor and beat each other to a pulp and i wake up all hot and sticky 👍”

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, CRUSTACEAN.

There's a different species of barnacle, Sacculina, that parasitizes crabs in a similar way to this. It has a very cursed lifecycle and I assume the crab is also having a weird time.

i bet the pain will end if i arrange a perfect enough sentence about it

being moderately proficient with computers in the early 2010s was casting a hex on your family to call you sheldon

i got a big bang theory box set and a bazinga t shirt for christmas when i was 16

my dad wanted to get me a psych eval so i could say "im not crazy. my father had me tested." like sheldon did and after the psych eval they diagnosed me with paranoid schizophrenia

this could be the funniest thing that has happened to anyone ever. my condolences king