the purpose of friends is to have people who unconditionally hate your shitty exes & relatives. like maybe YOU have a complex relationship with your father but i sure don't. i'm outside his house with a gun. he's not the unforgivable asshole who raised me he's just an unforgivable asshole

its not inexplicable to me. i could explic it.

so the mom just managed to find the most haunting large object behind which to hide a child

PREHISTORIC PROTO-MONKEY: I don't need ascorbic acid. From my cells. I eat fruit all the time dude. I'm better than that OTHER PREHISTORIC PROTO-MONKEY: I agree with your lifestyle and will fuck you raw to prove it GUY LOOKING FOR THE NORTHWEST PASSAGE 36,530,125 YEARS LATER: ow oof my shitty british teeth

You always be on that damn tapestry

just another hour of tapestry in bed

"Woah lol check this out" *Hefts tapestry over to show you a section that's incomprehensible without context*

everything is a circle so we’ll be right back

rothko in the turner gallery???

we are not reviving the r slur. if you hear someone say it tell them to cut that shit out. it’s not funny or edgy and we need to make people embarrassed and uncomfortable saying it

The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

how dare you say we piss on the poor

all hail the 1 million note Piss Post

captured by a vampire but theyre trying to find a good youtube video to watch while sucking your blood and youre just like come on can you just get it over with