there was an incident at work today
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@garbageboy-stinkman
there was an incident at work today

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Actually if I was miles edgeworth and I had to fight against Phoenix ‘bullshitter’ wright I would go insane too. He just starts bringing up meaningless shit interviewing your witness, completely irrelevant to the case, and the judge just lets it happen cause he loves gossip. He says shit like ‘sir the witness was obviously lying! Two days before the murder they didn’t wake up at dawn! They woke up 15 minutes later!’. And miles has to be like ‘what the fuck does this matter we literally have photographic evidence and dna analysis of your client KILLING THE MAN’ and. And then. He wins. He strings together a line of irrational bullshit so well that your witness goes ‘ARRRGH AAAHHHH ALSKJDJSS. I DID IT I KILLED THAT GUY’. Now personally if that was me I would strangle him but becoming psychosexually obsessed with him works too I guess
Fun fact: by just using imaginary numbers, some Evil Math, and 101 rotating vectors You Can Create a shitty approximation of a fish.
two points of view on math fish
I do not agree with veganism as a moral standard. If it is your personal moral stance, that is fine. If you think humans eating meat is inherently immoral, I don’t want to deal with you, you’re hopeless. Vegan ideology behaves more like a sect of evangelical Christianity than a dietary choice.
Veganism is better for the environment, but claiming that it's a morally superior choice ignores cultural and economic factors that make people eat animal products.
It is not inherently better for the environment. That is the thing. When you begin trying to explain that local, sustainably sourced animal protein is better for the environment than imported plant proteins that are farmed 3,500 miles away using slave labor, they start tuning you out. Down is better for the environment than polyester stuffing, leather is better for the environment than pleather. We should work on making animal agricultural practices more sustainable instead of trying to shame everyone into eating plant products that are also farmed unethically and unsustainably.

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Don’t let fake fans tell you different, Trek has always been queer 🏳️🌈🪐🚀
Stuck in a historical war
You are stuck as a soldier in this historical war
(this is a magical universe where people who wouldn't usually be able to fight would. so you can all suffer.)
How are you doing?
good somehow
I might survive
OW
dead
results/other
DNI if you've ever:
Been to Greenland
Been to Denver
Buried treasure in St. Louis (or St. Paul for that matter)
Been to Moscow
Been to Tampa
Been to Boston (only if you went during the fall, though)
Hoisted a mainstay
Swabbed a poop deck
Veered to starboard
You know what just DNI if you've ever sailed at all
Walked a gangplank
Owned a parrot (I shouldn't have to explain this one)
Been to Boston in the fall (cannot overstate this)
Okay, but what if I've never plucked a rooster and I'm not too good at ping-pong, and I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall, and I've never kissed a chipmunk and I've never gotten head lice, and I've never been to Boston in the fall?
You're safe
i love it when jake and nog do stupid nickelodeon bullshit. this is the final frontier.
the suite life of jake and nog
like u shouldnt be expected to work hard on monday bc its basically still the weekend and u shouldnt be expected to work on tuesday bc you are still getting ready to work and u can work a bit on wednesday. and u shouldnt be expected to work on thursday bc its almost the weekend and u shouldnt be expected to work friday bc u have been working so hard alllll week

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1001 Dalmations
Incredible faces OP, love how loose the lines are and the expressions/profiles are brilliant
fun fact about me: When I was 6 years old I sent so much hate mail to the president (the second Bush) that the mail carrier had to tell my mom I needed to stop before we got FBI’d
I was COMPLETELY unaware of the US political scene or why the adults in my life hated Bush, but I knew I hated him because he let people shoot wolves from helicopters and that’s mean and shitty
I also had a poor grasp on how stamps worked, so given that I wasn’t allowed to continually throw money away by putting stamps on my presidential hate mail, a lot of the times I just drew squares with little pictures inside on the corner.
Love, love, love reading more proof that everyone should encourage the children in their lives to write to elected officials--it teaches them about citizenship and can also be very funny.
When I taught second grade, one of the options for students who had finished their work was to write a letter to the president. I would send all of the letters in a big envelope at the end of every month.
Watching my students get more and more frustrated with him (and concerned about his wellbeing) was not the result I'd hoped for when I came up with the idea, but it was kind of hilarious.
See, Obama had a standard packet with information and activities about his dog he'd send in response to letters from very young citizens...and of course his office sent one back to our class every single time we sent mail.
So eventually all of the letters looked something like this:
Dear President Obama, I am writing about the environment. I am sad that the Great Barrier Reef is hurt. Also the Amazon Rainforest. Can you help? PLEASE DON'T WRITE BACK TO TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DOG AGAIN. WE ALREADY KNOW ALL ABOUT BO. WE COMPLETED THE MAZE AND COLORED HIM IN. It is good that you love your pet a lot. But try to remember the environment. It is also important.
Every morning, the queen asked her magic mirror to show her the most beautiful person in the world.
The mirror replied "To whom?"
"The miller who made the flour for my bread," the queen would say, or "Whoever spun the thread my shawl was made of".
The mirror would show her, and she'd be amazed.
The first time, she says "To me," and the mirror dutifully shows her her reflection. And she is pleased.
The second time, she says "To the King," and she is pleased to see herself once more.
The third time, she says "To the Royal Advisor," and is once more satisfied to see herself.
The fourth time, she says "To the scribe who takes the King's letters." She is shown the man's wife. And she seethes, but quiets herself, for it is only right that a man loves his wife.
The fifth time, she says "To the Court Wizard," and is shown the man's departed mother as he remembers her from his youth, radiant and smiling and warm and larger than life.
The tenth time, she says "To the Stable Master," and is shown the fastest horse in the stable, majestic and free as the wind even in captivity
"To the baker," she is shown the man's daughter, young and adorable and full of joy and laughter.
"To the artist who did my portrait," she is shown a painting of a woman done by the man's teacher, who he still looks up to now that he is well established himself.
"To the Royal Knight," she is surprised but not displeased to see the castle's entire guard force in the middle of doing drills.
The one hundredth time she asks the mirror, and it asks her "to whom?" she once again says, "To me." And she does the same the one hundred and second, and again and again and again.
It is a different person each time, and they are all beautiful.
i think 'I trust you with my life but not your own' as a trope is one of the ones that can always fuck me up no matter what
"I trust you with my life because you are good and kind and noble--I know you will not hesitate to do everything in your power to save me.
I do not trust you with your own life because you are good and kind and noble--I know you would not hesitate to sacrifice yourself to save me."
THAT is where it's at!!!!!
I only watched the first three seasons, there’s only so far this parody can go.
wait, I remembered one more thing I know about Supernatural

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Bugs Bunny and Lola Bunny reinterpret this cartoon first published in German magazine Lustige Blätter in 1932: