Just A Chicken

Asexuality is something I feel so deeply and it's impacted my life in huge ways (often negative), and I need media that captures those huge feelings ya know? I read an article or smth recently where it was singing praises about some character that's asexual but their orientation isn't their whole identity or the main focus, and that's great! But for many people it is a huge deal! And I just feel like that's not all that groundbreaking for an asexual character, when thats also every asexual character ever, just one small little sidenote that won't be explored much.

And assuming its chill for me to talk about my own personal hatred of sex...as a sex repulsed ace whos experienced SA, sex is not a neutral thing to me. To me, sex is horrifying, not just "ew gross", but something I can never experience safely. And I cant stop thinking about a horror story that explores those feelings of being a sex repulsed suevivor in such a sexualized world. Experiences of someone that where others see a beautiful or desirable physical act, they see body horror. What others see as the ultimate declaration of trust and intimacy, they can only feel a deep violation.

Chapter: #21

and then thinking about all the people who call her cold or uncaring or clinical about what she has to do to save earth. eva stratt, who had silly t-shirts and vodka and favorite meals stored in the Hail Mary and treated with the same level of importance as the finely tuned equipment and the centrifuge the entire planet relies on for salvation.

and then thinking about eva stratt nodding and saying, “yeah, I’m pretty awful. that’s why i’m in charge” with a neutral expression and even believing it. as if crafting the most beautiful coffin and homage to her soon-to-be dead friends won’t haunt her always.

thinking about eva stratt being the first person on the “eva stratt is a monster” train, welcoming ryland grace aboard and knowing she believed in him more than anyone else.

She surveyed the disaster below. “Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.”

Good writing: