Khepri’s Favorite Meat Puppet

Your 30s aren't too late. Don't let nobody tell you that stupid shit.

Your 40s aren't too late. Don't let nobody tell you that stupid shit.

#as long as you're alive it's literally never too late

"kung pow penis," a phrase commonly used in reblogs to indicate utter disdain for OP, has twelve letters, each of which (traditionally) must be supplied by a different user. the unanimity of disdain indicated by these twelve unrelated users has strong parallels to the requirement of unanimity for a jury—also traditionally of twelve—to arrive at a verdict. in this essay i will

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I genuinely think there was no greater insight into the modern Christian mindset than when the Pope said he very much hoped Hell was empty and he was absolutely hounded by both Catholics and Protestants outraged at the idea of a man who wanted a place of infinite suffering to have nobody in it.

This 1️⃣ goes out to all the horny 💏 couples out there who are thinking 🤔 of getting rowdy 🔞 this 💌Valentines💮 day evening: 👍 👎DO ❌️ NOT👍 👎 If you do your child 🧒 will be born 👏 a ♏SCORPIO♏ Now, why ❓️ don’t ❌️ we like Scorpio's♏? For starters, “Scorpio” has 7️⃣ letters 🔠. 7️⃣ letters 🔠: 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins ✝️ 🙅‍♀ Now, what are the 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins? Wrath, Sloth, Gluttony, Envy 👏👏 Envy is associated with the color GREEN 💚 What else is green 💚? Marijuana. Just 1️⃣ more pothead in the world 🗺️. LAME. Now where is pot 🍲 legal? Canada 🇨🇦, Washington, Colorado, Oregon, Alaska, airplane ✈️ bathrooms if the pilot’s 👨‍✈️ chill. And where can 🥫 planes ✈️ take you? California 🕶. And what’s on California’s state flag 🚩? A BEAR 🐻. Your child 🧒. Is gay 👨‍❤️‍👨.

The execution is like slam poetry but the content is clearly a shitpost and that’s def the most powerful combination I’ve encountered in a while

I still think that should be the thing for which he's the most famous. It should be brought up every time he's mentioned. In any news article, any interview, any history book. "Elon Musk, who was offered a chance to end world hunger and turned it down." Put it on his fucking gravestone.

wormblr is great because yeah i get to talk about Worm but also occasionally i see entirely unrelated discussion of worms and that’s also cool

there are so many things on gods green earth that are not platonic but are also not romantic. the erotic, the familial, the unconditional, weird codependency, weird codependency (hatred edition), etc. let us all broaden our horizons

reverse gaslighting where i pretend to know exactly what you are talking about

academic conferences

Work meetings

Interviews

Auditory processing disorder

conversations with my cats who are yelling

Me letting that little kid with their hyper fixation tell me every single fact they know about it

Goncharov (1973)