emily

spent several minutes really confused at the correlation between "topping" and "having a penis". i forgot y'all are like having penetrative sex? very confusing. don't you know that sex is something you do with your teeth?

it’s been like two days since i’ve been touched and im like crawling out of my skin i’ve been absolutely insatiable recently it’s torture. can someone come over and touch me always? thanks.

it really doesn’t feel like thinking anymore can someone come over and hit it over and over and over again? if that’s not too much to ask. okay. sorry.

broken glass in my fingies owie ouch ow

better or worse than fiberglass?

okay so i technically didn’t mean to cast the ‘spell that turns you into a wind-up doll’ on you but everyone kinda agrees that you’re a lot cuter this way so i think i’m just gonna leave things as is.

i talk big shit about monsterfucking but the truth is nothing has ever made me as indescribably aroused as that one shot of dragoon gloves in the ffxiv heavensward trailer

im glad this post has been a big hit with gay people everywhere

when are we going to do the tea party? ??? sad dollie? tea party.............................. does no one want to play with me? sad sad dollie

reblog this to pet the user you reblogged from please

Reblog this to multiply the pets by petting everyone down the reblog chain until it goes all the way back to OP!

they’re saying specifically the way you want attention is like, immoral and bad and wrong for a person to want. yeah. They got all the scientists and all the philosophers and all the wise men of the world and they kinda looked at you and frowned and said the way that she wants attention makes her a bad person :(

they’re saying specifically the way you want attention is like, immoral and bad and wrong for a person to want. yeah. They got all the scientists and all the philosophers and all the wise men of the world and they kinda looked at you and frowned and said the way that she wants attention makes her a bad person :(

they’re saying specifically the way you want attention is like, immoral and bad and wrong for a person to want. yeah. They got all the scientists and all the philosophers and all the wise men of the world and they kinda looked at you and frowned and said the way that she wants attention makes her a bad person :(

after a couple hours chopping dried sea urchins into tiny pieces with a razor blade you start referring to the razor blade as yourself in your thoughts. a little while afterwards you'll inevitably think something along the lines of "i'm getting a bit dull, i'm going to have to throw myself out & get myself a new self" at which point your internal monologue has pretty much returned to baseline

This happens with mobility aids too. I bump into shit with my forearm crutches and say "ow" before I realize those are not, in fact, More Legs. Then when I get up and try to walk without them for a second there's a moment of feeling like a dog walking upright

I think there’s a teaboot(?) post about this with a huge security cam system

Yeah I get twitchy when I don't have my eyes